I found that taking my daughter for a ride in the car, just the two of us, did wonders for her opening up and talking to me about things she wouldn’t normally have talked about at home.
Just don’t push her to all of a sudden start talking. My daughter and I played silly games like making words out of the letters in license plates we saw, or picking a letter and coming up with words that begin with that letter. Eventually, I would bring up something that happened to me in my childhood and ask if she ever had something like that happen to her.
Also, while I understand that the pressures of being a parent can be tiring and distracting (I was a single parent for 16 years) I do think it’s important to know and understand your daughter, and be cognizant of when she’s nearing the point of exploding. Pay attention to what is leading her in that direction, what behaviors she’s exhibiting beforehand and see if you can remove any of those triggers from her environment.
Before you can help her, you have to understand what it is that’s influencing her or causing her to react. And in order to stop the explosive outbursts, she needs a safe outlet for those pent up emotions.