I’m so sorry you’re going through this. You are a good wife to plead on his behalf. What you described of him, sounds like my brother–who will argue at the drop of a hat & “follow” you into a room until he feels he’s established that he’s “won” the conversation. He’s FOR SURE borderline personality.
I hope you find some relief soon! People who are chemically imbalanced can be completely functioning when given the right medication & combination therapy.
GOOD LUCK! Good vibes comin you way.