Hi – I feel for you and your son. I would not let them downgrade him to a 504, that would only be if he was improving and the school environment was effectively working. The dr we see swears that medication doesn’t effect behavior yet Focalin has been very effective in a way that enables my son to be much more attentive in school and less disruptive, impulsive with language. As he gets older Strattera is the other option but we went through 3 medicines before Focalin and the effect of Focalin is subtle without side effects so what we want. Negotiating with son to give a medication a trial but also be firm with it and exercise as the behavior is disrupting his life too. My son hates ever being pulled out so push in worked to support the classroom and the amount of designated IEP time has gone down and as freshman in HS is going down from 5%.
He will still having IEP with social and academic goals. (In your case I would feel threatened if they suggested changing him to a 504) If socially he is doing well with Spanish and is learning in that class I can see why that might not be effective but he may complain no matter what so have to look at what they wish to accomplish and whether pull out will help. You did not say exactly how old he is but if able to have an Advocate come with you to the meeting that maybe helpful too especially if they are pushing for a 504. Rock climbing might be a good winter sport or biking/hiking. Ours walks to the corner store to get lemon drops – gets him outside for half hour or more and there’s some personal freedom there.