I cant offer you advice as I too am struggling with the same crippling fear of failure and feeling of worthlessness. I commend you for your achievements,be proud of yourself. Any success with ADHD is a success far surpassing those of “normal” people. Know that your past success is proof that you are stronger than your ADHD. Also know that you are not alone in your self-defeating feelings. I share your pain in my life as a housewife. Whether it’s getting the dishes done or thriving in your occupation, ADHD is hard. It makes everything hard and the world is not designed for people like us. But if anyone can overcome their ADHD, you sound like a person who can. Hang in there friend.