Thanks for the response. Your response did not upset me, because there is always that part of me that knows there will always be a lot of judgmental people out there, including those who want to pick on us or make us feel like we are just ditzy/dumb/clumsy/airheaded/addicts/crazy etc etc. That’s why I’m thankful for small communities like this! Here, we are not judged.
I understand what you mean about not wanting to tell people. I have always been of the mind that it is important to speak out about our issues so that we can reach out to those who are suffering in silence. Also I want to play a small part in destroying all the stigma and ignorance surrounding this condition. But I also know that there a lot of times when we may need to protect ourselves. Of course, no one wants to be harassed for something that can’t be helped.
I hope you do find the help you need. Medication alone won’t help, as you know. You need a larger, stronger support system. Without that, our symptoms will remain as they are, and we will continue to suffer. I too am trying to find my support system. Thankfully, I have moved on to new healthcare providers at Columbia University Medical Center (I live in New York City… my goodness, imagine someone like us, living in NYC! It’s a nightmare I tell you. I have dreams every single day of leaving this chaotic place, it is torture to be here 🙁 ), and I am happy with my new psychiatric NP and neuropsychologist, who are working together to help me, and they will likely give me some resources and connect me to support groups. It takes a lot of time and patience (which for many of us, are abstract concepts lol), but I don’t know… we’ve got to keep going.
I am also glad to find someone else here who admits to struggling with emotions. I mean, I wish it wasn’t so hard for us but, there you go. I am glad someone can commiserate. I feel like a child! Again, I know this isn’t our fault, but I was always so used to getting mad at myself for flying off the handle at things everyone else would find minor. And I dwell on the stupidest things… *sigh* Dealing with the emotions is probably one of the hardest things for me. The ups and downs…. they take a toll. They make me very tired.
Anyway, again thanks for the response! I hope you also find this community at least slightly helpful 🙂