Do you think asking her to be a “body double” could help you organize a few things at home & help her understand how routine things AREN’T routine. Maybe “acknowledging” that you do need help in certain areas, instead of saying “I can’t because of ADHD”. Talking to her & recruiting her to your side might help bridge the gap. Maybe ask her to post a couple reminders to you for an event, or help “finish/cleanup” an event or projects with you, or whatever you do together Pre-plan, divide your tasks based on your strengths & ask her help where needed. Someone mentioned Habits/routines. You may need to hire someone to help you set up systems to support your needs, but ultimately, you have to do your work also & know when to ask for help. It is very difficult to establish routines, but the more you practice “starting” each habit, the longer you sustain it until it becomes self-sustaining!