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Many of these traits are not consistent with ADHD. Yes, we have trouble being organized and paying attention and all that. But an individual with Just ADHD still maintains a sense of responsibility and obligation. I’ll tell you what: I have ADHD and my credit score is over 800. I’ve never been evicted. I’ve never been named in a lawsuit. And nobody I’ve dated complained of a pattern of abuse by me even after the relationship was over. (Though they had other legitimate complaints. :))
Also, the bottom line is, you’re miserable in this relationship. I don’t care what he has, your life is suffering because you’re with him. Leave, for your safety. You deserve better.