Hi! I am an ADHD mom with two ADHD boys, 9&11. Personally I will do everything I can to avoid medication because I feel that they are too young to be on a medication for the rest of their lives. However, I would consider if I am unable to find other help. The first thing to learn is that there is no one size fits all.
I still don’t take anything but didn’t realize I was ADHD until (40+ years old!) working with my oldest son when he was showing signs of ADHD. My oldest takes an Omegas + D liquid every day and it is completely evident when he misses a day or two. For the most part he’s been doing this since 2nd grade and all Omegas are NOT created equal. Most don’t work like the one he’s on (Coromega big squeeze). My younger son took longer to show up in school because he’s very quiet (shy) but wouldn’t remember to take his jacket off, writing his name on papers. Decaf green tea helped him for awhile and he still likes it and how it makes him feel but we are just now reintroducing him to the Omegas too and hoping for the same results.
If you medicate or try natural alternatives, it’s only a part of it. I will say this, it will take a lot from you to make things go smoothly.
For me, it was important to boost their confidence, which isn’t always easy, but I sure understood a lot about my feelings after being diagnosed and hated school by 3rd grade. It made my life difficult. I start with talking very openly about it. It’s nothing to be ashamed of and there’s not one person who is perfect. Some imperfections are just easier to see than others. Both my boys play sports so each year I (we) come up with “Game Plans” with their teachers and we become a team. I always have to sit with them for homework. You also have a boy. Public schools methods of teaching cater to girls minds (if you research there’s several studies and they’ve known for quite some time). Boys do get restless.
Unless you’re son needs a special ed teacher for learning (LD issues), I would do the 504 instead of the IEP. It’s easier for both sides and covers from medication, fidgets, gum chewing and breaks. Fidgets are great if they aren’t a distraction (like the fidget spinners which become toys!). Walking breaks can also be very beneficial.
Lastly, unfortunately, there’s often a lot of anxiety that goes along with ADHD. It’s not easy and not always, but we try ending the day reading a story in bed which relaxes everyone. I also point out whenever possible successful people who have ADHD like Adam Levine and Howie Mandel.
I hope this helps. ADHD people are very smart, they just don’t fit the mold. Aside from intelligence, they are usually compassionate and creative- which is another reason why I prefer to not use medication. I don’t want to dull or change that! I feel that it’s very important to have open,honest communication with my sons. If the teachers know you’ve accepted the diagnosis and you are open about it, they will be more open with you and more willing to try different approaches for your son as well.
Sorry, last thing! Some days will be trying. Know that so you don’t overthink it. Now that my older son is 11 1/2 I’m seeing some changes in him. We increased the Omegas a little bit and he really can’t miss a day anymore. But because I’ve been open with him and trying new things he’s already finding strategies on his own. About 2 months ago he started getting up about a half hour earlier for school so he could watch a little TV before school which has helped calm any anxiety before school.
Good luck for you and your son. Your attitude in your text is very positive and open and that is the best way help.