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Hey, I don’t really have a lot of advice here but I just want to say I know how you feel. ADHD can be a mess and I get it. I’ve had a lot of the same problems, school, anxiety, coming out as bi, and it’s hard. High school has been a huge struggle. My junior year was the worst. I’m a senior right now, and I’m still in a bit of a mess as far as school goes.
Coming from someone who’s had a lot of trouble figuring myself out, don’t be afraid to tell people what you think is going on. It’s okay to talk about yourself sometimes. And even if you turn out to be wrong about yourself, it’s okay. The people who care about you want to know what you’re going through, and they’ll accept you for who you are as you figure yourself out. It’s okay to be wrong, it’s okay to be scared, it’s okay to be stressed and anxious and afraid of being judged. Believe me, I’ve been there. Just test the waters with one person at a time. Find the one person you trust most, and wait for the opportunity, or make one, and tell them everything. Finding someone who you can talk to is super important in figuring things out. (I found someone and well… now I have a boyfriend.)
Also don’t be afraid of wasting your time. You have your whole life ahead of you. If something doesn’t work out, it’s not a waste. It’s just a part of your life, and you can always start over with something new. Don’t be afraid of doing things too late or wasting time. Time doesn’t really mean anything, don’t be afraid of living your life in whatever order you want. Hair grows back, tattoos hold memories, and picking up a violin can change your life… or it might fall flat, but that’s okay! I wanted to play drums and get a girlfriend, take AP Classes and learn to program computers– now I play the Cello, have the best boyfriend in the world, am taking classes I enjoy and like to paint. Once you start to realize that you can do whatever makes you happy, things become easier. I’m still stressed, I’ve still got the pressure and the expectations and the bad grades of past years, but I’m happy. I don’t want to die anymore, I know there’s no need to be perfect and I have all the time in the world.
Sorry for the long reply. Just remember that you’re not alone and it’ll be okay. And let me know if you ever want to talk! 🙂