Driven to Distraction, The ADHD Effect on Marriage, and You Mean I’m not Lazy, Crazy or Stupid are excellent books for people with ADHD to recognize themselves in. Written in layman’s language, they are gentle introductions to the subject. As bromides (ADHDers are “creative”, “gifted”, etc.), the books sometimes encourage an ADHDer to get evaluated, formally diagnosed and treated.
However, to families and partners, stressed and exhausted from dealing with ADHD behaviors, these three books have a disadvantage: their focus on what others can do to help the person with ADHD. (Taking personal responsibility is suggested only very quietly to the ADHDer.) Friends and family are better advised to quickly read these books and move on to more-detailed, practical sources of information:
ADHD in Adults: What the Science Says, by Russell Barkley.
The ADD Roller Coaster, by Gina Pera.
Attention Deficit Disorder: The Unfocused Mind in Children and Adults, by Thomas E. Brown.
The Barkley, Pera and Brown books are highly readable and easy to understand.