Sorry I left this so long- it’s been a while since I signed in, sorry ><
First off, honestly, don’t feel guilty about any of this. Yes, he has struggles, yes, things are hard for him, but just because he has a challenge you don’t doesn’t mean that you have to put up with the outcomes of that. You have to be able to live your life as well, and it’s completely ok to take exception to the way you’re being treated.
If he’s asked you to write a list before, then that’s all to the good. It means he’s aware of it as something that might help with the issues both of you face. And as he suggested it himself, he’s more likely to put in the elbow grease to actually make it work. These are all good things.
Finally (sorry this is so short, but I’m in the office), if he’s having trouble sleeping on his meds, that suggests to me that he may be on the wrong kinds of meds. I’m assuming that he’s on stimulant medications. Has he tried any of the others, or told his doctor that he has sleeping issues on his current meds? Maybe they can work out a plan to try different medications, or change his dosage, or somesuch, that would make his adhd symptoms manageable without causing sleeping issues.
I’m glad my earlier comment was able to help you, I hope this one does too 🙂
@Kendall Glad you can relate 🙂