Wow. What a life you have had! Please don’t give up though. You are worth it! I really that you get the help you need. I am 44 and I am going back to college, and I finally see how hard life is BECAUSE of my ADHD. I have not been formally diagnosed, so I have no medications. But I can see a lot of tips on this website that will help. Many people still do not understand ADHD or “believe” it exists. I will not listen to them.
When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hold on. God bless you.