As a mom of two kids with ADHD – 12 and 15 – our stories are similar. After much trial an error I have found one approach to work consistently. Lives in balance by Ross Greene – collaborative problem-solving. Trust me – I was skeptical but desperate. I read his book ‘the explosive child’ https://www.amazon.com/Explosive-Child-Understanding-Frustrated-Chronically/dp/0062270451by recommendation. Every parent should read this book. I Gave his suggestions a try. Then I started to watch his videos, all free. I downloaded his free worksheets to guide me. https://www.livesinthebalance.org/paperwork It works. It helped. It takes practice. The results are worth the effort.
Additionally, regarding the morning routine with my 15 yr old. Last year I bought the ECO dot for each kid. They were done being yelled at before school, and I was done being their frontal lobe. (LOL) Alexa is the result of our collaborative problem-solving. We sat down and worked backward… What time do we need to be in the car by? 7:10. What time do you need to have breakfast by? What time do you need to be dressed? What time do you need to be out of the shower? What time do you need to be up and in the shower? OK let’s set Alexa to wake you up daily, set Alexa to remind you through the morning routine. It worked. If they have time left over – they get to have their electronics. Hope this helps.