Forgiving My ADHD Impulsivity: Will She Get Over It?
When ADHD impulsivity results in infidelity and lies, non-ADD spouses sometimes struggle to forgive.
Undermining a partner’s trust — by having an affair or lying about something important — can damage your relationship for good.
The best way to help your non-ADHD partner forgive you isn’t to rush her, but to acknowledge her hurt while letting her know that you’re trying hard to avoid making the same mistake. In your case, this might include eliminating your ex-girlfriend from your e-mail contacts and Facebook Friends list, as well as promising your partner that you won’t contact your ex again.
Telling your partner, however gently, to get over her feelings, only creates more hard feelings, because you are denying her pain. You’re saying that her feelings about your indiscretion don’t matter as much as yours. Be patient and penitent.
[Click to Read: “What I Love About My Wife with ADHD”]
Melissa Orlov is a contributor to ADDitude, a coauthor of Married to Distraction (#CommissionsEarned), and the author of The ADHD Effect on Marriage (#CommissionsEarned).
Related resources
- Free Download: Manage ADHD’s Impact on Your Relationship
- Can an ADHD Diagnosis Save a Relationship?
- When Both Partners Are Diagnosed: Understanding the Other’s ADHD
- End the Coaching, Mend the Marriage
#CommissionsEarned As an Amazon Associate, ADDitude earns a commission from qualifying purchases made by ADDitude readers on the affiliate links we share. However, all products linked in the ADDitude Store have been independently selected by our editors and/or recommended by our readers. Prices are accurate and items in stock as of time of publicatio
