Ask the Experts

Are You Afraid of Expressing Yourself?

Blurting. Putting your foot in your mouth. Interrupting. They’re practically synonymous with ADHD. But, that doesn’t mean you can’t participate in conversations. Learn how, with these strategies.

Q: “Although I can be very passionate about things, I find it difficult to express myself on a deep level, especially in casual conversation. I consider myself intelligent, but often I am reluctant to open my mouth, for fear that I’ll look like an idiot. Please help.”


As you know, ADHD can affect your ability to demonstrate your intelligence to the world. First, try pausing for a moment to collect your thoughts before responding. This sounds simple enough, but it isn’t easy for ADHD folks. Practice with a close friend or family member, someone you feel comfortable with. Try to come up with two or three main points before saying anything. If the setting is appropriate (you’re talking on the phone, or you’re in a meeting), scribbling some brief notes for yourself can keep you on track.

If there are certain topics that your friends discuss regularly, like global warming, spend some time thinking about them. Listen to the news or do some online research to help you flesh out your own ideas. You’ll be better prepared to weigh in the next time that topic comes up.

If conversation turns to a topic you haven’t thought a lot about, it’s OK to admit that. Offer to get back to the person, or ask what they think, then play off of their ideas. Don’t feel that you must have all the answers.

[Free Download: 8 Ways to Get Better at Small Talk]

Updated on October 19, 2018

1 Related Link

  1. After reading these articles in “Friendship” I now realize it was ADHD all along – The reason I have never been able to keep friends or even make them. It all makes so much sense now – I never thought about how it could be related to ADHD before. I have a lot of research to do now on this but this has been an eye opening discovery.

Leave a Reply