Adult-to-Adult: “How has ADHD affected your relationships?”

Getting diagnosed with attention deficit is usually a relief for the person herself, and for those around her. Our readers share the good and the bad about ADHD’s effect on family and friends.

ADHD can cause cracks in a relationship
ADHD can cause cracks in a relationship

ADDitude asked: “How has ADHD affected your relationships?”

My parents accepted the fact that I needed to do things differently, and they didn’t make a fuss about it. I struggled with teachers and others not understanding my ADHD. My husband’s not understanding my condition has been the hardest. It is especially hard now that we have a son with ADHD. My heart breaks twice when my husband thinks my son and I are making excuses. B.S., Texas

My having ADHD makes it harder for my husband and me to make decisions. The good news is that our sex is great. -An ADDitude Reader

ADD has screwed up my work life. I’m forgetful, I miss deadlines, my office is a mess, I have trouble processing spoken info and following conversations in meetings. Like many ADDers, I’m creative, charming, and have a good sense of humor. So what? It doesn’t help me have a rewarding professional life. Maybe I need to join the circus. -An ADDitude Reader

My ADHD symptoms tore my marriage apart. I wish I’d been diagnosed decades earlier. My ex said he might have been more sympathetic if he’d known the reason for my behavior. John, New Jersey

I had a rough time with my boss and coworkers, not because of my diagnosis but because of the medication I was taking. My prescription went generic, and I thought that was no big deal. It took me nearly a year to figure out that my anxiety and near-paranoia were not the results of things changing at my workplace, but because the new generic medication was leaving me unable to manage my emotions. Things are a lot better since I went back on the name brand. Julia, Ohio

My diagnosis didn’t change our relationship. I changed after receiving treatment. I became more responsible: I didn’t forget to do things, I finished tasks, I didn’t avoid boring jobs, I finished school. This has made life easier for both of us. Melissa, Texas

My relationship with my husband is challenging, but he sits back and lets me fly. I have an excellent relationship with my child, because he has ADHD, as well, so I’m more understanding of his behavior. I have told my friends I have ADD and explained to them that they should call me out when I blurt out the wrong thing. -An ADDitude Reader


1 Comments & Reviews

  1. Finally being diagnosed with ADHD has affected me deeply, being treated for depression for years almost killed me! My hypersensitivity is understood now, and I’m finally making decisions that make sense for me. What most people thought they seen as depression was antisocial behavior. I have musical abilities I always have, so a withdrawn attitude was not something I saw as a sign of concern. As an adult and being a woman I was in an uphill battle to prove there was nothing wrong with me. I spent time in a mental facility where I met one doctor who asked me one question that changed my life…have you ever been tested for ADHD? I said no. After being tested and being put on the medication my life has been much safer. My husband and now adult children, much more understanding. I fit somewhere…I’m ok now 💃

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