Guest Blogs

“ADHD Relationships and Reading Cues”

The psychotherapy and medication treatment for adult attention deficit disorder take a back seat, while the personal life reaches new heights.

The Sensitive Guy is a chatterbox. Every other night he calls and we are on the phone three, four, sometimes five hours (and I am the adult with ADHD). Time flies, and he laughs and listens to everything I say. I wonder if it is because he’s lonely, I mean he just moved to a new city, new job, and there’s the pressure of studying for the boards. I feel like I am clothed in a veil of uncertainty with him. The overall feeling is that he’s interested and yet is moving at a snail-like pace when it comes to commitment.

The bottom line though is that I am terrible at reading social cues. I wonder if it is the adult ADHD that is the cause of this, and the real reason why I feel the urge to turn to the stepmother or a friend for a second opinion. The ADHD treatment has taken a back seat since I started the job. The bottle of Adderall is empty and I’ve skipped on several ADHD group meetings.

I’ve been on cloud nine-on a bit of a honeymoon-and it seems like luck has turned around. The father returned from a trip to Asia a couple of weeks ago, and said he visited the big Buddha in Hong Kong. He kowtowed to the Buddha, and shook out a fortune from the incense can and it said, “Good luck for the rest of the year.” I told him that half of the fortune was his since he did the shaking, but he said it was completely mine.

Looking back, it seems amazing that I’ve escaped the trailer park in the ‘hood, and now have an apartment in one of the best neighborhoods in Manhattan. The 10021 zip code sits pretty, even if it is a temporary sublet. The apartment materialized through a friend, who pointed me to a middle-aged woman who spends most of her time in another state. The apartment is suspended high on the upper floors-the view at night is breathtaking and brings a single word to mind: Gotham. I’ve never had my own place in a two-doorman building, and the idea of an elevator vs. a walk-up still doesn’t seem real.

But for the first time I am sleeping in my own apartment in one of the ritziest neighborhoods in Gotham. I fret and fear that the other shoe will drop, but then I stop myself. Sometimes you just have to take a step back and enjoy it. 10021 here I come.

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