Ask the Experts

5 Ways to Avoid Marital Conflict

Practical tips to ensure that your home life runs smoothly.

1. Post a family calendar in your kitchen or home office. List all appointments, social engagements, family events, and so on. Check it together at the same time every day or week. To keep romance alive, ADHD coach Nancy Ratey suggests scheduling at least one couple-only vacation a year, and one night a week as “date night.”

2. Create “time cushions.” Always allow 30 minutes longer than you think you’ll need to get out the door. That way, you won’t be late – even if you forget something and have to run back inside, or have to finish a task before leaving the house.

3. Break down big projects into small tasks. Set a deadline for each task, as well as an overall deadline. If you’re redecorating your living room, for example, set dates for picking out paint and fabric, finishing the painting, hanging the curtains, and so on. Record your progress in a notebook. For example, “Called plumber on Saturday. Awaiting a call back.”

[Free Download: 6 Ways ADHD Sabotages Relationships]

4. Plan on procrastination. If you or your spouse works best under pressure, be sure to keep your calendar clear in the days leading up to the deadline for a big project.

5. Keep track of daily activities. For one week, the partner with ADHD should write down everything he or she does each day and how long it took to do it. This will make it easier to estimate accurately just how long it takes to get things done.