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Explaining the Diagnosis

Q:

"My nine-year-old was recently diagnosed with ADHD. What’s the best way to tell him? I don’t want him to feel 'different.'"

A:

Usually, children are not upset by the diagnosis — they’re relieved. There’s a good chance that your son already knows he’s a bit different from other kids. Without an explanation, he may assume that it’s because he’s “bad” or “lazy.” Just tell him that he has ADHD, and that this means his brain is “wired” a bit differently.

List some of the symptoms you’ve observed in him, so he can see that you understand what he may be feeling. For example, you might tell him that he sometimes seems to have trouble focusing or that he gets bored with activities before his friends do. Be sure to remind him of his positive traits, such as creativity, enthusiasm, and so on. Let him know that “different” does not mean “bad.”

Dr. Carol Brady is a clinical psychologist in private practice in Houston, Texas. She is also a specialist in school psychology and a well-regarded speaker in the area of ADHD, children, and families in trauma and Tourette's Syndrome.

She received her Ph.D. from LSU and she is currently on the scientific advisory board for the Tourette's Syndrome Association and is an adjunct faculty at Baylor University and the University of Texas. Dr. Brady hopes to help children and families who deal with neurological/developmental disorders by serving as a regular columnist for ADDitude magazine.

2 Comments:

  • Posted by dmmk - Jan 22 2009 @ 5:37 PM
    Book recommendation
    I hadn't heard the term bibliotherapy before - but it's a great suggestion. Try the Joey Pigza books by Jack Gantos. They would be appropriate for elementary or middle school kids. When you read what Joey does & how he feels, it really makes you connect (but these are very funny books!).
  • Posted by MissTips - Jan 22 2009 @ 10:19 AM
    Telling a child
    As a former elementary school counselor, I agree that most children are relieved. I also recommend 'bibliotherapy' to supplement - use of story books. When the topic is discussed in terms of a character in a book, taking the focus away from the child a bit (and letting them know that they are not alone), it is sometimes easier to open up a discussion. Your clinician may have some titles to recommend, or search any of the book sites or school or local libraries.
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