|Adult ADHD Home||Succeed at Work||ADHD Self Test|
|Love & Friendships||Manage Time & Money||ADHD Adult Blogs|
|The Organized Life||Stress, Sleep, Health||Adult Support Groups|
|Apps & Gadgets||Inspirational Stories||Expert Answers|
|ADHD Parenting Home||Schedules & Time||Sample Routines|
|Discipline & Behavior||Teens & Young Adults||Parent Support Group|
|ADHD Parenting Skills||Nutrition & Diet||Parenting Blogs|
|Friendships & Social Skills||Sports & Hobbies||Summer & Camps|
|ADHD Treatment Home||ADHD Medications||Medication Reviews||Adderall|
|Treating Your Child||Nutrition & Diet||Fish Oil Printable||Daytrana|
|Expert Q&As||Non-Medical Treatment||Find Professionals||Strattera|
|Behavior Therapy||Brain Training||Quillivant XR||Vyvanse|
|ADHD/LD School Home||High School & College||Accommodations|
|IEPs & 504s||ADHD Study Skills||ADHD School Guide|
|Working with School||School Organization Help||College Survival Guide|
|Social Skills at School||For Teachers Only||Is it LD? A Self Test|
|ADHD Diagnosis Home||ADHD & Women||Is it ADHD? Self Tests|
|Getting a Diagnosis||Is it a Related Condition?||Medical Q&As|
|ADHD Symptoms||Post Diagnosis Next Steps||Myths & Realities|
|Is it Learning Disabilities?||ADHD Treatment||ADHD Support Groups|
|Tools and Checklists|
|ADHD Topics A-Z|
|Share Your Story|
|Give a Gift|
|Buy Back Issues|
I Can't Understand My ADHD Husband!Filed Under: ADHD and Marriage, ADHD and Relationships
"When I sit down to talk with my ADHD spouse, he jumps from one topic to another, and I can’t follow him. When I ask him to explain what he means, he hits the roof. What can I do?"
First, have a conversation with your attention deficit husband, and go with the flow of his thoughts. Try to follow the drift of his words without worrying about point-by-point specifics. After he’s done, repeat what you think he said. Say, “So you’re saying X.” If you misunderstand, he’ll correct you without feeling that you’re attacking him.
Second, point out to your spouse that people without ADHD think more linearly than those who have it. These differences lead to misunderstandings between the two of you. Remind him that your questions are meant to clarify what he said, and that you are not criticizing him. Or, if you find this difficult to discuss with him, write a short letter explaining why it’s important that you and he respect each other’s ways of processing information. Your goal is to defuse his anger by helping him understand that the communication breakdown is due to the fact that his ADHD brain is wired differently from your brain. I’m sure that this approach will result in more productive talks.
What do you think of this article? Share your comments on www.ADDConnect.com, ADDitude's community site. Check out the new ADHD Medication User Reviews and the ADHD Adults Support Group. Your fellow ADDers want to hear from you!