3 Ways to Talk It Out with Your Spouse

Q:

My non-ADD partner does not understand the condition, and doesn’t seem willing to learn (I’ve offered books, but he won’t read them). I think he doesn’t want to believe anything is “wrong” with me. What can I do?

A psychologist and ADHD coach explains what to do when someone you love doesn't understand ADHD and isn't willing to learn about the condition
A:

It is difficult for people without ADD to understand the struggles that those with the condition face every day. Fortunately, there are many ways to learn about ADD. Instead of trying to convince your partner to read an entire book, start with some brief articles on the Internet (additudemag.com and chadd.org are good starting points).

You might consider asking him to accompany you to a local, regional, or national ADD conference. When you’re surrounded by dozens of experts lecturing about ADD, and hundreds of people with ADD sharing their experiences, it is difficult to deny the existence or impact of the disorder.

If starting on a smaller scale seems better, both of you should meet with a psychologist or therapist. This will allow you to discuss your questions and concerns, and to address any underlying issues involved in his denial of your ADD.

Dr. Michele Novotni is an internationally recognized expert in the field of ADHD. She is the former president and CEO of the national Attention Deficit Disorder Association (ADDA), an inspiring speaker, best selling author, psychologist, coach and parent of a young adult with AD/HD. She is the author of Adult AD/HD and What Does Everybody Else Know That I Don't?.

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