Therapy is good for talking about stuff (feelings, concerns, frustrations), and the right medication in the right dose is good for adjusting our brain chemistry (symptoms), but ADD shows up most in our behavior. Changing behavior doesn't happen by itself - it takes a conscious, specific plan of action and then we have to practice those actions repeatedly over a period of time (weeks or months) to form new habits. If your treatment program doesn't include new behaviors and habits, it's not complete.

If you were to physically injure your body so that a part of you didn't work quite right, the doctor might discuss the injury with you and prescribe medication to manage the symptoms. That might help your condition a little, but you probably wouldn't fully recover from the injury without some new behaviors, such as physical therapy, regular exercise to strengthen the injured part, and knowledge of actions that might make the injury worse. In order for your body to work better, you'd have to do all these things together - and the most effective part of your treatment wouldn't be the medication or the trips to the doctor's office, it would be your daily efforts doing your exercises and practicing your new behaviors.

Medication for ADD can help manage mood and attention, but it won't fix our behavior - our daily habits. As the saying goes, if we do what we've always done, we'll get what we've always got, even if we feel better about it. Your friend probably can't tell exactly how you feel, but she can probably see what you're doing, your home or workspace, your attitude. If your treatment program isn't helping what you're doing, you might not be addressing that behavior component. You might consider ADD coaching - there are online sources as well as coaches you can meet in person like you meet your therapist - or an online community like Flylady.net (Baby Steps!!) to build up small habits that make big impacts over time.

There's no magic pill that will make us pick up our socks, remember where we put the car keys, show up to appointments on time, or keep our finances in order - that's the product of learning a whole bunch of small, simple steps (one at a time), and then practicing them until we can do them routinely.

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What a fantastic response @kbare! Very helpful advice.

@tickelme, when I read your post I immediately thought of this article on ADDitudeMag.com, "The 10 Worst Therapists for ADHD Adults," (http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/7287-11.html) outlining some signs that it might be time to change course.

I agree with @kbare too though, it may be time to find an ADD/ADHD Coach who can help you move forward and beyond feeling "stuck."

Penny W., ADDitudemag.com & ADDConnect.com Community Moderator

ADHD Momma to Luke, age 7

creator of the Website {a mom's view of ADHD} @ http://adhdmomma.blogspot.com

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Thanks for the feedback. And it makes a lot of sense, add is about behaviors. The coach sounds esp expensive since I'm unemployed. But I will try not to give up and stay discouraged. Thanks my peeps!

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Read the article. Thanks for the link. Its great. And it did reassure me that I have a good therapist. She's not perfect. But she is patient; I don't scare her; she does listen and refocuses me. (phew!) So a coach huh? A support group would be good too, I think.

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adhdmomma said: What a fantastic response @kbare! Very helpful advice.

@tickelme, when I read your post I immediately thought of this article on ADDitudeMag.com, "The 10 Worst Therapists for ADHD Adults," (http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/7287-11.html) outlining some signs that it might be time to change course.

I agree with @kbare too though, it may be time to find an ADD/ADHD Coach who can help you move forward and beyond feeling "stuck."

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