I know the last time i wrote I was very down in life in general , the one yr annoversery of my grand mother's death , proceeded with mother's day , then three weeks after that dealing with my son's birthday as well as the one yr annoversery of giving my son up for adoption was very very emotionally trying for me . The relationship between Jeremy & I had been rocky the last 3-4 months , the emotional issues that Jeremy has with his brother's and sister has really started to affect our relationship , I have noticed that when Jeremy is arround his brother's and sister for any exteneded ammount of time , that he seems very aggrovated as well as frustrated . I know that alot of Jeremy pent up anger & resenment stands from his relationship with his 3rd oldest brother (Robbie) the relationship between Jeremy and Robbie has changed alot over the yrs , and when I say change I don't mean change for the better , change for the worse . Lately Jeremy has not gotten along with his brother Robbie at all , nor has Jeremy been getting along with his faturnal twin Jason , on top of that Jeremy's youngest sister owes us money & has yet to pay any of it back , so that relationship is very rocky . I have talked to Jeremy in great length about his temper , as well as him getting easly frustrated when it comes to really simple tasks , poor Jeremy with his ADHD he gets distracted very easly , by the phone ringing, one of his brother's wanting him to drop what ever he's doing , to come help them , I have felt so bad for Jeremy , bless his heart , he wants to stay on task & get his chores done , such as cleaning the car , or going grocery shopping . I try to help Jeremy as much as I can , I am trying better to keep up on the house work , keeping the house some what clean, such as wiping down the kitchen cabinets once a week , cleaning the bath rooms once a week, vaccuming once a week as well as dusting once a week , how ever it doesn't matter how much I try to clean once a week , with Jeremy's OCD it's never completely clean like he wants it . This of course leads to many agrueements , then of course once an agrueement starts , I get on to Jeremy about his temper , him taking all of pent up anger he has for his brother robbie out on me , telling him that it's not me he's angry with , it's not me who has hurt him so badly , that I can't take responsiblity for someone elses screw ups when it comes to sibbling relationships . I am an only child , so I don't know what it's like to have brother's and a sisters . Now even tho Jeremy and I have issues , with mostly surround his family , all the yrs of abuse and anger he has against them , I still love Jeremy & he still loves me . For the most part Jeremy does his best to provide , he does his best to make sure the bills are paid, the dog is taken care of , he does his best to make sure my mom is taken care of . I have spoken to jeremy many times about him taking an anger management class as well him going to some sort of therphy or counseling , I have also spoken to him about us going through some sort of couples counseling , so that away we can learn how to agruee better with out putting each other down , there for causing each other to feel like crap & have resentment towards each other .

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