My daughter's 12, and still doesn't have this down the way she should. I know that when I get frustrated, angry, upset and talk to her about "responsibility" (without having a practical solution to offer along with the lecture)-it really just makes things 10 times worse. She gets even more forgetful, and will start to tell (easy to see through) lies about schoolwork if she's under enough pressure, just to avoid that "negative feedback" for a little while longer. Of course then she gets even more of it! I think this is why all the experts preach "positive reinforcement" so much--it breaks that cycle. So far, I've just had to "mature" my positive reinforcement, as she grows and her interests change.

The best really practical advice I've seen and used so far, for blank homework planners and all the homework issues related to that has been homework emails, which my daughter's middle school supplies anyway (that's a lifesaver! ) and when that still didn't result in those completed assignments actually getting turned in, she got a daily progress report added. She has to get it signed by each of her teachers at the end of class. It's a little bit of a hassle, true, but I don't what else will really work. Without some small amount of additional supervision, it's really hard for these kids to get into good work habits in the first place.

No matter what physical age, or how smart in other ways, your son's organizational skills may still be back in middle or even elementary school. Being organized, keeping on top of paperwork, is a skill set, like any other. It takes reinforcement and often practical step-by-step instruction to learn. I can only imagine, as independent as by daughter already is, that a teenager would balk even more at being "treated like a baby," but it sounds like he may need some (intelligent, age-appropriate) support for keeping track of assignment, so that he has a fair chance of doing them, getting them in, etc., and maybe some real practical instruction in strategies to stay organized, streamline materials, making and using checklists, technology, etc. Unfortunately, just reminding my daughter that she's responsible for doing it- doesn't always give her the practical information and tools she needs to get it done. Beyond just getting supports, and teaching some practical things that help, there's also the issue of getting her to actually USE them. That is where positive reinforcement (age-appropriate of course) and natural consequences really come in handy. Conversation from last year: "Mom, my whole project for reading is due tomorrow!"-only words spoken from 4:40pm to after 10pm while my daughter typed furiously at the computer one night last year, "Are you going to wait till the last minute with your project for science too?"-my words, which got an emphatic "NO!" -and the project for science was turned in a day early. I also got her using a folder for just projects/book reports/long term assignments, etc., with a little list of what class it's for, the due date, etc. so she can get a better feel for prioritizing, and see when various due dates in different classes are starting to bunch up. She's still nowhere near "there" yet. but she's improved tremendously over having half a quarter's classwork in lost in her binder, mostly completed but not turned in (zeros and more zeros') and has come a very long way from stuffing unfinished work in a nearby empty desk and crying when asked about it (2nd grade). It's a lot more work that it should be to teach my otherwise very bright daughter how to keep up with simple, obvious things, but it does get easier, for both of us, as she learns ways to do this that work for her.

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I know how you feel. My son is 11 and I can count on one hand the number of times he has made it home with all of his homework and needed materials. I have a couple of suggestions....#1 get an extra set of books to keep at home, less to remember. #2 a daily tracking sheet. I have just started this with my son so I cannot tell you how well it works, but I have my fingers crossed. Basically all it is is a table with a line for each class, then there is are columns for his teachers to check. For my son his columns have a behavior rating, a planner check (are his assignment written in it), did he turn in his homework and then a line for the teacher to sign. At the bottom there is a place for notes. I write in things that he needs to remember to do/turn in outside of the normal classroom work. For example, I would write in turn in field trip permission slip today or bring home extra math book, things like that. I hope this helps and good luck!

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