My name is Michelle and I am a mother of two kids boy 16 and a daughter 14. My son is ADDHDHA. I took that lable off of him when I saw what it did to him, Chris was in school had an I.E.P then we found that the school was not doing what they needed to do to help him. As a parent we give our kids over to the school and think they know what's best for our kids. The question in our home was would you give your child to a stranger and just walk away and hope for the best? NO. Christopher is not on meds and he does fine. I pulled him from school and for the frist week we did nothing I pulled out his I.E.P. and looked it over I made a list of everything they say he couldn't do and then asked him why he thought he could do it. I was floored when he told me because I have never been showen how to do that. I then asked him what do you like to do his answer was I don't no so I then took him places to see what he liked an boy oh boy we found he loves art, music skate bording and spending time with other kids outside. I sat him down and told him that if he wanted free time he was going to help our family help him. So I was off the frist thing I did was to put in place 20 min short talks what would you like to do what is it that you are in need of from your teachers me the family. Shocked at what came next was time time with you and time to have fun so I took time and fun and put it to the test I took him to Low's they have a free class on the weekend to show you how to build lay a floor, so we did that after he saw other people mess up and lol he became a new person.I asked him what he thought of seeing adults mess up he said it was fun to see that we mess up and that in the end evrything worked outfine. I say that to get to this. When I had my son in school he was in grade five and I went in to check on him when I found him in class coloring a picture of graps, and it had nothing to do with class so I saw that right then I needed to be his voice until he could speak for himself. the school saw nothing wrong with this but I was haveing none of it. My husband pulled him out of school that day, we suede the school and won and now christopher is wellon his way to a full life I am not saying this works for everyone but when Chris got into collage it was well worth it one on on time and keeping what he wanted to do and how he learned was the goal love was easy and enjoyment was key. If you feel that you and your son can just have a fun day play what he wants wether you want to or not open the dor to his world once inside you will be able to get what you need from him and the school. and don't always beleave what the school is telling you or even the teacher they do see everything and yes they can be wrong sometime A MOTHER WHO HAS BEEN THEIR AND WON

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My son is also starting 8th grade. He also has Asperger's and social anxiet disorder. We can't get an IEP)he tests too well). Yesterday he had a major meltdown including starting school. I emailed his psychologist to let him know. I also told Daniel that we would go before school started to meet his teachers instead of the registration night which is crazy. I volunteer at the school so all the teachers know me. But i still have to stay on them about his modifications. He will start back on his ADHD meds before school. The only suggestion I can make is to try to keep the lines of communication open between you and the school. If you can try to plan something fun either before school starts or "treats" for after school -we often go to Mcdonalds. Here's hoping things go well -I'm already dreading High School!

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i'm not sure about your area but here where I am in Florida I wentthrough the Child Find Program. My son is only 4 but it enabled us to get on the right road to get his IEP and to start preschool early. Last year was his first year.

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I worked with legal services in our State as I couldn't get my son on an IEP either with his ADHD. What I found out was that he was eligible for a 504....read up on them. Our kids may be fine academically speaking but their disability does effect their learning ability and their behavior. Social skills are just as important as academics...probably more so. Check with your state's PTI (Parent Training and Information Center) and PACER for more info...great great resources.

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Hi All, As a Mom with a child with ADHD and also a teacher in Canada, I have to say I can see both sides of the coin. It hurts me to see so many posts that criticize the school system or individual teachers. I have to say that all of the schools I know of and teachers I know do their very best to meet the needs of each of their students. With twenty or more students in a classroom, that about 2 minutes per hour with each child - not mentioning bathrooms breaks, time to teach the whole group etc. Many classrooms have at least four or more students with ADD/ADHD and many other children with LD's including severe behaviour challenges. We do so many things to try to help children including small groups, differentiating learning, and trying to motivate students through their interests. But, we are only one person in a class of twenty or more - so of course I could never give the amount of time and thought that a child's parent(s) could spend on directing their attention toward their needs as I need to divide that between all my students. With that said, the children who face the most challenges are often the children whom I am very close to and care for deeply. I am not always thrilled with everything that my daughter's teachers do or don't do, but I also understand that they are human and often overwhelmed with their own families,planning, teaching, and all of the extras that they provide for their students in arts, sports etc.

The best thing you can do is support your child's teacher through open communication, have patience, and try not to criticize. They will never be able to do 100% of the things that you wish they could, but just like you, most are doing their best to help your child grow and succeed socially, emotionally, and academically.

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My fourteen year old daughter is entering high school and I am so worried about how she will do socially and keeping her work organized. She is very capable, but often does not know when assignments are due etc. and her social interactions have always been a challenge - which often results in her being the one left out, picked on etc. It breaks my heart. She is already getting worried about missing her bus etc. I am going to get her timetable and walk around the school with her to find her classes in a quieter setting, any other suggestions from parents who have been there?

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My daughter also loves gaming, media etc. anything that she can tune out to. I use them as leverage in a system where once she finishes homework, then she can use it for a certain amount of time. If she gets out of hand, then she does not have them for a certain amount of time ranging from a night to a week. I actually find she is a much happier less grumpy teen when she spends more time away from media - although she fights it initially!

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I'm not totally sure, but I think that you as a parent can request an evaluation. If the district does not comply with your request, they have to explain why. In Iowa, there is an advocacy group that helps parents. Don't know if your state has one or not. I had to request an evaluation for my daughter after having teachers tell me there's nothing wrong except that she is lazy and distracted. I am a teacher, so this hurt me tremendously as we worked with her to try to help her "speed up." We discovered a processing problem which I had been saying for two years.

I will stand up for teachers as it is hard to distinguish between learning problems and 'don't want to' problems at times. I hope your teachers will try to do what's best for your child. I've found that I am the best advocate. You have to be a watchdog even when they child has an IEP or a 504 plan; AND I used to write the 504 plans for our school! Sometimes it is a slip up, sometimes it is a teacher who does not think the 504 or IEP means anything. I always wanted to give the teachers the benefit of the doubt.

Good luck with the school year. Due to other mental health issues for my daughter, she is pursuing her GED. It isn't the school's fault; it just is in our case.

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As a parent if you write a formal letter requesting your child have a formal evaluation legally they have to do it withing a certain amount of days. i would also request the days and times of said scheduled testing and send your child in unmedicated. Meds go bad and become inneffective at times and my daughter was tested medicated and even then scored on the low end of normal (even though she is very smart) If they tested her without her meds she literally would not have been able to focus long enough to do the work and most certainly would have qualified for some services. She needs small groups in an out of the classroom setting. Any child who has a formal diagnosis of ADHD is legally qualified for a 504 and accomadations.

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FYI, my daughter's 504 was changed over to an IEP at the end of last year (and I can already see how it's more helpful to her) I know the school always tries to do their own testing, then tell you it was just short of qualifying for real help. I can tell you this, from what I've learned, most teachers would RATHER see a student getting additional services than have to keep dealing with an under-served student (and all the work and repurcussions of that) in their classroom. They just either can't or don't know how to make it happen. It's up to the parent. My daughter started getting anxious and depressed, and between my emails and letters, and the ADHD clinic she goes to backing us up, I pointed out to the school exactly how and why her problems WERE secondary symptoms of ADHD, developing BECAUSE of the pressure caused by not getting the interventions she needs. As parents, we want to hide when our kids are having real problems, but sometimes it's better to let those "secrets" out, especially when the school is (however inadvertantly) contributing to them, by not helping a student who needs it. I never ASKED for an IEP (I did contact the 504 chairperson for the county and have her come down and meet with my daughter's support team) but the school just finally saw the obvious-that it was easier to have one then keep dealing with unhappy student, complaining mom, complaining teachers, etc etc. No specific learning disability, but the whole combination of ADHD symptoms (lack of organization, lack of focus, social problems) and the fact that she already had an IEP for strictly her speech therapy, they just found it easier in the long run to do it right .

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crteacher said: As a parent if you write a formal letter requesting your child have a formal evaluation legally they have to do it withing a certain amount of days. ....Any child who has a formal diagnosis of ADHD is legally qualified for a 504 and accomadations.

Point 1 is not necessarily true anymore with the creation of Responsiveness to Intervention (RTI). However, each state's implementation varies.

The last statement is explicitly wrong.

the following is a quote directly from the Federal Dept. of Education Office of Civil Rights. http://www2.ed.gov/about/offices/list/ocr/504faq.html

"25. Does a medical diagnosis of an illness automatically mean a student can receive services under Section 504?

No. A medical diagnosis of an illness does not automatically mean a student can receive services under Section 504. The illness must cause a substantial limitation on the student's ability to learn or another major life activity. "

There are several FAQs of follow-up commentary on the site. For example, there is specific advice on how LEA's should handle medical diagnoses and perform their own determination.

http://askdreric-schoolpsychologist.blogspot.com/

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Come to think of it... I did kinda have to go on a "campaign" last year.... I think the email I sent to ALL my daughter's teachers (from the Schoolastic website-"Girls and AD/HD-Are You Missing the Signs?" -even PE and Home Ec-probably got some of their attention. (The Vice Principal and 504 Chairperson for the school did ask me to send any future such articles I want to share through her...) and the 10 page email I cc'd to the 504 Coodinator for the county school system probably raised a few eyebrows. I was just truly sick and tired of the school system doing all of these evaluations, agreeing that there was this issue, yet always doing a 360 whenever any teacher up and decided that my daughter's issues (with obvious AD/HD traits) somehow had NOTHING to do with her diagnosis. When communicating to the school, I kept the "whining" to a minimum, concentrated on just a few really important things that NEEDED to change ASAP (the bullying my daughter was enduring on a daily basis, the way she was being routinely humiliated in front of her class-which by the way was likely contributing to the bullying substantially, and the masses of missing assignments-the greater majority of which were classwork, not homework.) then pointed out HOW and WHY those really are issues related to her AD/HD. I'm a single mom, and I just don't have all the resources most of the other parents in my community have. I had to use what was available to me, without any advocate or attorney representation. The point is, if you keep pushing, you can get help. I didn't have a choice to sit back and hope it got better--I saw my daughter changing right before my eyes. She was getting depressed, waking up with nightmares about being hurt in school, her confidence was long gone, she was withdrawn and nervous, and all the progress she had made was slipping through our fingers. I know I'm kinda hard on the school system. I just feel like I have good reason to be. While some of the people I've dealt with have been absolute heroes (and believe me, a few have been!) still others have caused a great deal of harm to my little family, out of ignorance and pride. Believe me, if you really use all the resources at your disposal, somebody WILL eventually listen, even if it's just to prevent themselves from looking bad. One of the most effective things I've learned (and I'm sorry if this sounds terrible) is to use teacher's comments as "proof" that your kid needs and deserves real help. I ask for copies of everything now. I research the "complaints" -on the internet, on this site and Chadd's site, I take them to the AD/HD clinic that prescribes my daughter's medication, and I write back to the school how the complaint is related to a symptom. (Of course, only when it clearly is) Last year I really think they "complained" themselves into handing over and IEP for OHI!). Okay-dokey. My daughter's had a great start so far this year. There's at least one kid she trusts in just about every class, and her teachers are so far, terrific. She's excited about signing up for some extra-curricular activities. Yahoo. Bring on the complaints!

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