It doesn't seem that his symptoms are under control at all. Your Dr. may need to revisit his medications. I have two that are sleepless but I give them a homeopathic calmer until they get back on schedule. If the counselor isn't helping, perhaps you need to keep looking. My dad believes a butt warming is the answer as well...He just doesn't get it. "They are just boys". I realized that one of my sons was hating school and hating homelife and that he really felt that there was "no safe place to fall". I had to find a place for him that was not about his ADHD but about him! He loves video games and that is his motivator. I actually tell him that his video time is his time without ANYONE telling what to do or that what he is doing is wrong (violent outbursts and cursing are not allowed, though). What makes him tick? What is it that he could do that made him feel like himself? Help him find his place, whatever or where ever that may be. They need to know what "okay" is like. I forgot that and, man, did mine pay the price. I stayed on him 24/7 until we were both miserable. Homework got done but (he got me!) it didn't get turned in! projects were started but (got me again!) broke before they got turned in. Please right the symptoms down and take them to your Dr. Life doesn't have to be miserable for the two of you... but it will probably always be busy and interesting.

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It doesn't seem that his symptoms are under control at all. Your Dr. may need to revisit his medications. I have two that are sleepless but I give them a homeopathic calmer until they get back on schedule. If the counselor isn't helping, perhaps you need to keep looking. My dad believes a butt warming is the answer as well...He just doesn't get it. "They are just boys". I realized that one of my sons was hating school and hating homelife and that he really felt that there was "no safe place to fall". I had to find a place for him that was not about his ADHD but about him! He loves video games and that is his motivator. I actually tell him that his video time is his time without ANYONE telling what to do or that what he is doing is wrong (violent outbursts and cursing are not allowed, though). What makes him tick? What is it that he could do that made him feel like himself? Help him find his place, whatever or where ever that may be. They need to know what "okay" is like. I forgot that and, man, did mine pay the price. I stayed on him 24/7 until we were both miserable. Homework got done but (he got me!) it didn't get turned in! projects were started but (got me again!) broke before they got turned in. Please write the symptoms down and take them to your Dr. Be sure to tell him about the insomnia. It is a symptom, too. Life doesn't have to be miserable for the two of you... but it will probably always be busy and interesting.

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I really sympathise with you. I am a single mum with 2 boys both diagnosed with ADHD. Both behave in completely different ways. The oldest is 13 and relatively placid but away with the fairies at times. He is on Concerta and it works well for him. The youngest is 11 and has oppositional defiant behaviour, which the medication doesn't help. He has tried the long acting meds and they don't seem to suit him. so after another trial he is on the short acting Methylphenidate again. I find the best way to keep him on track is to feed him a hearty breakfast. Usually cooked i.e waffles, sausage, bacon and beans. Then I know he has had a good start to the day. He doesn't do cold food so lunch times are an issue. I took him out at lunchtimes for 2 years so I could feed him properly. Now I cook a meal and his teacher heats it for him at school. Both the boys are bright, above average at school and easily bored. Like yours they spend most of their time on the pc, or playing video games, which I find infuriating! However I know this is what makes them tick and life tolerable. Confrontation just isn't an option often. It does happen and there are times when the boys know that I want to do something and come hell or high water we will as a family do that activity. :) Happy mum leads to happy children......hopefully. Tomorrow is one of those days and they know that if they don't come willingly then they will lose the pc etc for the rest of that day and they know that I will carry that out! I started programming them a week ago about tomorrow. Programming is the word I use when I want to get something through to them.:)

The youngest boy has had issues at school where the other children know what buttons to press to get a reaction and Versuvious errupts and it does. He has been excluded from school on a day when he has been on a med change. I have had to get out of my pram on many occassions with the school. The issues have been many and I shall be glad when he leaves this school. On the other hand he has had some very good and understanding teachers too. His current one is exceptional.

Homework is another issue and at 11 it is not an issue that I'm willing to battle with. There are enough battles to fight as it is. However when he moves up to secondary school he will have to do his homework or face the consequences. Programming has already started.

I have read many books on ADHD and pick out the bits that are important to us as a familly. I believe that the most important thing these children need is to know that they are loved for who they are and not how they behave. When the youngest blows I have been know to shout at him 'I love you, even now!' I never, never carry forward an argument. To be honest I never remember what started it half the time.

Bedtime is an issue withthe eldest he finds it har to switch off. I can relate to that so allow him to read at night. PC' etc go off at 8.30pm and bed time is 9 ish and then they can read. He is often still awake at 11pm. but quietly reading. I often have to wake him at 7am. I haven't tried any remedies for it, I was the same and now I sleep on a clothes line!!

My parents think they need a good whallop too....do they think I didn't do that, and did it work when they did it to my brother.....NO. I'd say don't worry what they think. If you have some good friends that know you are doing your best get them to support you. Find time for yourself while the kids are at school, I do, and it is a tremendous help. I tried our local support group but they didn't focus specifically on ADHD so that didn't help. Have the school got a parents group or are you able to start one. You'll be surprised how many parents feel the same as you.

Anyway I guess I've waffled enough....that helps too! Helps put my situation into perspective. I'm off to the allotment and my safe place now!

Love your son for who he is, don't punish him too harshly and remember, its not winning all the battles that is important its winning the war!!!

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Map768 said: I am a single mom with 2 boys. My youngest who is 12 was diagnosed with A.D.H.D. at the age of 8. Since then i have been trying to find a support group or something to help me cope with his many outbursts and to help him help himself. There are many battles over bed time which he does not go to sleep until after midnight and thats on a good night. Then there is the battle to get him to do his homework which is lost completely because i get so frustrated. He is flunking the 5th grade because he wont do his school work in school or his homework at home and i have tried everything i can think of to make him want to do his work. I have taken everything away from him from his toys to video games and that has not worked. I dont know how to motovate him to want to do his work, i have tried by rewarding him with a night out and a night with mom playing a game or watching a movie and so far nothing has worked. I have no support system from my family, my mother says he`s not A.D.H.D. he just needs a good butt warming,she doesnt understand why he does the compulsive things he does or why he lies and why he acts like an 8 yr old instead of his age. I have tried to give her pamphlets on it but she says its a disapline problem and nothing more. Believe me i wish it was because of that because then when i punished him he would behave ,but sometimes he just doesnt know what hes doing or saying will hurt him or someone else. He is on concerta and sees a counsoler twice a month but other than that i really dont know how i can help him other than just being there for him and talking to him. The kids at school pick on him daily because hes not like them and he feels so isolated and alone, he wont get up in the morning to go to school and then when i pick him up hes always upset about something and says he never wants to go back to school. If anyone has any suggestions for me please let me know because im very frusterated and at my wits end.

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My 10 year old was diagnosed in 1st grade. He currently takes Concerta. I am fortunate to have a pediatrician friend/neighbor. Over the years she has recommended what the site is showing today: high protein diet, with protein at breakfast to start the day. Her explanation was that it assists the medication in the kids system throughout the day. Protein is metabolized slower and helps the kids stay regulated. Melatonin has also saved us. It is a natural sleep aid. Ask your doctor about dosing, but we are currently giving ours 2 mg in the evening about one hour before bedtime. It helps calm them down. Reading, instead of "screen time" helps too. My son uses his Itouch for music all night. He picks a song and I think it helps his mind relax. It seems to help him sleep all night with no problem. My son is in 4th grade and also feels that the kids (girls especially) think he's a "freak". I continuously remind him of the friends he has, how good they are, and that he is a good person. And I am truthful. He is different. But different is okay. Find him books on people who were "different" such as Thomas Edison, Albert Einstein, Bill Gates, Ty Pennington, Richard Branson....many who have/had "differences". I hope my son's differences serve him as well as it has served some of these people. Also, get the book "The Edison Gene". Very interesting perspective and ADHD. It has helped me look at my son's behavior in a whole new light.

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I too am single mom of 7 yr old twins... I give them Melatonin... 3mg each night... when they dont have it... bedtimes are AWFUL... with it,, no problems... that helps them get up better in the morning and keep a better schedule which helps them during the day... dotn get me wrong- we have lots of isues during the day but that has helped with the falling asleep issue.... hang in there! Ann

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