ADHD kids are often less mature than their peers. So it isn't completely unusual that your daughter doesn't act like a typical 25-year-old. Also, women with ADHD are often slow to get diagnosed and treated.

If you are interested in learning more about ADHD, I suggest you start with these articles:

ADD Women and Girls: Late Diagnosis, Little Treatment

Symptoms of ADHD in Women

ADHD Basics

I hope this helps. Dena

Quote

Sounds like a little more than ADHD. If she has few friends as you have described she may not know what is immature. I have a lot of friends who grew up in private school or home school and have a hard time with social situations.

Quote

My daughter is soon to be 26 years old and we have the same frustrations that you describe. She has been diagnosed with Asperger's autism. She is extremely intelligent and even gifted in some areas, which is one reason why the diagnosis took so long.

Let me tell you some of her symptoms: great difficulty with change, tantrums if things don't go her way, no real friends (she "smothers" anyone who would try), prefers the internet to real people, tends to steer ALL conversations to herself and needs to be the center of attention.

Doesn't seem to notice other people's feelings, doesn't seem to care about others, can be inappropriately honest or loud or judgemental because she doesn't understand social nuances. She told a woman at church (outloud) how she would have more money if she kept her legs together and stopped having kids!! She has a childlike interest in Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings and other fantasy lives. She would BE those people if she could because she hates herself so much. She is very impressionable when people in authority suggest things to her. Someone once told her that she was adopted (not true) and we were years trying to convince her otherwise. We finally got DNA testing done and ONLY then did she put that to rest.

If some or all of this sounds familiar to you, I would recommend that you go to a search engine and read up on it. From there I think you should get a consultation with a psychiatrist. while there is no cure, therapy and behavior modification is avaiable. Also she would be eligible for medical and financial help as a "handicapped" adult, ie special housing, job assistance, maybe even SSI.

Good luck!

Quote

My daughter is 19 & a senior in highschool still. I feel like she's so far behind emotionally. She wants to hang out with me more than anyone else. She's never had a boyfriend. She has a lot of friends, but no best friend. She was hanging out with some equally immature kids a few years ago and was quite close with one girl, but I had to put my foot down when the group was caught shoplifting. My daughter was the oldest in the bunch & could have gotten into the most trouble. She's not ready for college. Sometimes it's like she'll never leave home, how could she get through a day without me? She stopped her meds this year too. I just keep plugging away, giving her positive encouragement, but I'm truly worried.

Quote

She might have Asperger's Syndrome, which is often misdiagnosed as ADD because it has many similar symptoms. There's a lot of information about it on the internet, so if you want to take some time to check it out, it might be something to look into.

Quote

HI, I'M 31, & I HAVE ASPERGERS, ADHD, & DEVELOPMENTAL DISABILITIES. I'M VERY HIGH FUNCTIONING, I WORK, & DRIVE, BUT STILL LIVE AT HOME. I DON'T HAVE MUCH FRIENDS, & THE FRIENDS THAT I DO HAVE, ARE EITHER YOUNGER THEN ME, OR OLDER. BECAUSE, I LOOK NORMAL, BUT DON'T ACT LIKE I'M 31, IT CAN BE FUSTERATING, BECAUSE PEOPLE DON'T ALWAYS UNDERSTAND. I WENT OFF 1 OF MY MED, & BUT I HAVE FOUND OTHER THINGS, ALONG WITH THE MED, THAT WORK FOR ME. IF YOU'D LIKE TO TALK, GIVE ME A CALL, 952-212-8670, I'D BE HAPPY TO TELL YOU A LITTLE MORE ABOUT ME, & OTHER SOLUTIONS, BESIDES MEDS, THAT MIGHT WORK.

Quote

My kid is 20 and in college and I would say on many levels, he has the maturity level of a 14-15 year old. Unfortunately, he is in college where he is dealing with kids who are chronologically his age or slightly younger but more mature. Of course, there are those who don't have ADHD who seem even less mature in some ways. Socially, he is very immature. He is not my child...really--we just took him in emotionally and in other ways when he severed ties with his abusive mom. So I did not realize the true extent of his immaturity until the last few weeks when he was at our house for ten days over spring days. My husband, who has spent less time with him than I have over the past couple years, remarked to me: "He is so immature sometimes." In comparison to my 17 year old daughter,...well...I won't even go into the differences. Then I told my husband about the maturity issue. This boy has lots of difficulty with peer relationships, preferring to be with people who are older (i.e., me--I mean, what typical 20 year old would rather hang around with the person who is essentially mom than kids his own age?) and sometimes those younger. He plays and kids around in very childish ways. He cannot manage money and now I just had to have him sign up for online banking so I could watch over his funds--he spent over $1,000 on video games and eating out...I have to hope he doesn't spend what's left so he can pay for his summer class...I don't know if he will be able to find and keep a part time job because of his maturity level. Then, conversely, there are a few ways in which he exercises remarkable maturity. He refuses to follow the pack and smoke weed. I won't say he never drinks with his peers but rarely and after he got intoxicated once and breaking down, thereby embarassing himself, he limited it to one beer...a lesson many adults don't learn until they embarrass themselves many times over. Then, he treats women, including me, with enormous respect, and is not out to use women in any way...I know that one night at a party a young woman hit on him (and I think he wasn't used to it...) but even though he knew she would be an easy target and he does not have much experience, he walked away because she was intoxicated and he did not want to be responsible for any problem that could arise--plus, he said, "It wouldn't have been any fun" because she was too drunk. If that's not mature, I am not sure what is...but in so many ways, he seems to be 14 instead of 20.

Quote