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abbeyainscal said:

Here's the thing - this has been a pattern at EVERY single job I"ve ever had. I LOOK like the greatest thing on paper and I am 90% of the time. But, then, I get "off track" due to many unknown reasons but I sense that it has something to do wtih extra stress in my life but every one of the screeners describes me to a T.

I talked to my husband who totally thinks I have ADD but I feel so weird thinking that because (not to offend anyone), I"m not sure our modern world just doesn't create this "ADD problem". You know, the hurry up life we all live, the constant media barrage, etc. He says he's been cleaning up after me for years (he's right) - I leave the stove on and get caught up in vacuuming. Or I misplace things all the time. And, I definitely feel there are tons of times where I just can't focus and get my brain to stay in one place. But, I also think it's because I always want to learn something new, be creative, etc. and get bored with the minor details.

The fact that you said this is a pattern indicates it is more than just being stressed, although being stressed can aggravate the ADD symptoms. As for the modern lifestyle causing ADHD, it doesn't. However, the modern lifestyle does make it even more difficult for those who have ADD than a simpler lifestyle might.

My son was the first one in our household to be diagnosed with ADD about 7 years ago (he was 11 at the time) and my daughter who was 20 at the time felt like she might have it as well so she had herself evaluated and was also diagnosed. Two years later my husband was diagnosed. In the meantime, I read many books and articles on ADD and attended a support group for parents of children with ADHD. I was the most organized person in our household and I had a degree in accounting so I never thought I had it. However, one day the doctor said something to my son that started me thinking.

He said that studies had been done on individuals with ADD and those without ADD who had the same IQ and similar backgrounds and that those with ADD were consistently one school behind those without ADD. If someone with ADD graduated high school but went no further, the individual of the same IQ but no ADD tended to have a college degree. An ADD person who attained a bachelor's degree compared to a non ADD with the same IQ who obtained a master's degree. Considering the equivalent IQ's those with ADD did not acheive the same level of success as their counterparts without ADD.

I knew what my IQ was from my school records and I went online to read up on IQ. I found a site that gave certain ranges of IQ and the education those people in that range should be able to attain and the types of jobs they were quailified to do. When I looked up my IQ, I noticed that I was seriously below what my IQ would indicate I could accomplish. I started to consider the possiblity and mentioned it to my doctor (the same one who saw my son) and he told me to check out the book, "Driven to Distraction" and after reading it, to list any of the symptoms I had and give at least 2 examples of that particular symptom in my life (from childhood and adulthood) and to come back and see him after I had done so. The more I read, the more it started to click. I gave him 5 typewritten pages when I returned. I had all the symptoms for the inattentive ADD but none for the hyperactive/impulsive symptoms.

The doctor also explained that because I was more intelligent I had learned to compensate for some of my shortcomings and I had been able to get by easier in school because of my intelligence. In addition, my anxiety helped compensate for the ADD as well because worrying helps you to focus. ( I had noticed that my ADD symptoms had gotten worse after my anxiety was treated. ) I started on medication and I couldn't believe the difference it made. I told the doctor that I was now able to organize the thoughts in my head. The information was always there but I had trouble pulling it all together until I went on the meds. For the first time I found it so much easier to write letters, emails, memos, etc. The words and thoughts just flowed whereas in the past it was such a struggle to put something in writing. I was also able to comprehend and retain more of what I read, especially boring or difficult text.

My doctor was a general practitioner and he was the one who had first diagnosed my husband and later treated my son as well (but he had already been diagnosed by his pediatrician). He had an excellent understanding of ADHD so I was fortunate in that respect. Sometimes it can be difficult finding a doctor who understands and treats ADHD in adults.

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Even if you don't get a specific ADHD diagnosis, you can still employ the strategies ADHD adults use to keep their lives in order.

I found these articles on the ADDitude website about adult ADHD diagnosis:

My liberating, but Late, ADHD Diagnosis

Do You Have Adult ADHD: Why Diagnosis is Critical

Getting an Accurate ADHD Diagnosis

Adult ADHD Diagnosis: What to Ask Your Doctor

Life After My ADHD Diagnosis

I hope these articles help. Dena

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I'm just in the process of wrapping up my ADD diagnosis - I'm 44.

I could never figure out why I just didn't seem to be able "to get it together". I caught the last 20 minutes of the documentary "ADD and Loving It?!" last month and had an a-ha moment. I immediately began researching online and read a couple of great books. Everything I read led me to believe that ADD had been at the root of so many of the things I struggled with.

The information I read stressed the importance of an accurate diagnosis by a qualified professional. I made a few phone calls and eventually met with a great psychologist and he did some thorough interviews and testing. Next week I'll be wrapping up the analysis part and moving forward with a plan to live a life with ADD - and I couldn't be happier about it. I finally have a name for the thing that was holding me back. I was always reading self help books, looking for that magic thing that was going to make it obvious what the solution was. Over the years I had began to just think I was less than everyone else - it was depressing. Knowing that you're bright - yet never feeling like you're really harnessing your potential.

Although it's only been a few weeks since I started down this path I can already feel my outlook starting to improve. I've started to believe in myself again.

Go check it out and find out one way or the other. It could really change your life.

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I wanted to thank you all for replying, I received a lot of good advice. I was lucky to get an appointment with a psychologist and after asking a million questions, he says his "guess" is either bi-polar or "add". Now, he wasn't actually trying to guess, I pushed him for waht he thinks.

However, I don't think bipolar fits me at all, I've had postpartum depression but never really the "mania" where you are super hyper.

Anyway, the outcome of that visit was I get to now visit the actual psychiatrist to see what he thinks, talk about meds etc.

Having said that, are any of you on meds? If so, can you describe what you take and what if any, side effects there all. I will keep you posted. If you were kind enough to reply, I figure I should tell how it turns out.

I also will continue to see the psychologist about 1 x every 2 weeks to help manage my "life" but I hope that's not a long-term things. Well, I can't let it be - I don't really have the "time". Thanks again, Linda

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I am taking meds for my ADHD - both Ritalin and Wellbutrin. I take 150mg of Wellbutrin in the morning and 20mg of Ritalin with breakfast and lunch. My prescription allows 10mg of Ritalin with dinner, but I rarely take it.

Initially, I noticed a significant loss of appetite, but that faded quite a bit as I got used to the meds. It's still there, but not nearly as much. That's really the only side effect I've had. I haven't see any side effects of the Wellbutrin.

Ask your psychologist what the plan is in terms of your therapy. It shouldn't be an ongoing thing - it should be focused on specific goals and should be pretty short term.

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thrown in? That would be ok except I'm worried about further side effects. I don't know but I almost never have an appetite and I think it's the Wellbutrin but doc says no. So, what is it? I've lost a significant amount of weight in 2 years - I do exercise and did do WW but I kept losing. Seriously, like food disgusted me. It's been a little better and I put on a couple pounds. So that's my concern about stim meds.

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Hello Linda,

I found out that I have ADHD at age 39. I had been seeing a psychiatrist for several years for depression, and had asked exactly what my diagnosis was. When he said depression with ADHD I was floored! Why hadn't he mentioned the ADHD before? Why wasn't I being treated for it? It was only when I changed doctors that I was taken seriously and provided the help I need.

After receiving the diagnosis, I first thought there is no way I could have it. I am a middle-aged woman for goodness sake! I am quiet and shy-nothing like the young obnoxious boys that had been labeled ADD in school.

After denial came relief. My thinking was that this diagnosis explained a lot of what I thought were just personality defects, and it is easily treatable. Then came anger. Why hadn't anyone noticed sooner, and helped me? How can it be that I graduated high school and two college degrees without one teacher detecting it?

After trying a couple of different medications, I am now taking Adderall 20mg 2x/day. It has really helped control impulsive actions, and helped me be more patient with other people and driving situations. It is a hassle to fill the prescriptions since the doctor can't prescribe re-fills, it is a month to month prescription. Also, my insurance has to call the doctor each time to verify the prescription "because I am over 18". Apparently, it is a very controlled substance-although I cannot imagine it being worth the hassle for someone who doesn't really need it.

That is my experience as a fellow female about your age with the disorder. My advice to you would be to meet with a specialist in ADULT ADD for testing/evaluation. There seems to be a lack of experience in treating us non-school aged women, so finding the right qualified professional is worth the effort. Also, you may find reading books and visiting online sites like this helpful in understanding yourself, and how others without the disorder may mis-interpret your actions. If you have any children, you may want to have them tested as well, since it tends to run in families.

Best of luck in your journey. I wish you all the best in treating and understanding this sometimes confusing disorder.

Linda in Michigan

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Don't get too scared of the possibility of a bi-polar diagnosis until you are properly evaluated. I was mis-diagnosed with bi-polar type II several years ago. I was later re-tested and found to have ADHD with anxiety. I also found out thru a social worker that the doctor who made the original bi-polar diagnosis has since retired and was known by professionals in the field for over diagnosing people with bi-polar. Aparently some of the symptoms are similar, especially to professionals who don't recognize ADD in women.

I take Adderall 20mg 2x/day and Wellbutrin 200mg 2x/day and have had good results. Initially the Adderall made my heart race and I felt like I was "wired" all of the time until the dose was lowered. Also, I initally lost weight without trying the first week or two. Unfortunately that side effect has gone away :) Try to be patient when trying medications as it can take a couple of trys to find the correct drug and dose for you. Aparently age and body size do not apply as much to these medicines as much as they do for others, so a large adult may be prescribed less than a small young child with the similar level of disorder in some cases.

Good luck-it sounds like you are on the right track!

Linda

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I have a psychologist appt next week - will ask about testing. And, then the week after that I have the psychiatrist appt. So, I will keep you posted.

As for the lady who described herself and "shy and unassuming" what symptoms did appear that finally got diagnosed as ADD? More curious than anything. Also, I want to say I"m sorry you didn't find out sooner - I"m pretty much in a similiar boat too and I feel angry but hopeful because I don't want to fail at yet another job (I have to admit, I was only fired once but I was always in hot water for careless mistakes, etc).

And, not to insult anyone but I"m only a medical receptionist - that's no where near the management field I used to be in full-time (BK - before kids). BK, I worked full-time but still had these problems. And, anxiety!!!!

The hard part is now I"m overchecking, etc. things as work - keeping a list to make sure all my patients got what they needed or called for (like medical advice or rx's called in etc.).

I feel on edge all the time now at work like the minute I make a simple mistake, oh, that's it, Linda's stupid as always! Oh well - that's what a little tiny bit of Klonopin is for. I hate to take it but I will just until these doc visits are over and I figure out what's going on!

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Sorry, posted twice.

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I have an advantage. I know for a fact that I have a disorder. I spent the first 30 years of my life experiencing multiple involuntary muscular clinching attacks per day. This started when I was a child and got worse and worse over the years. I have been through countless epilepsy (EEG) exams and every time they were negative. I finally fell into the belief that it was anxiety, and it was. I actually learned to control these unusual panic attacks by not allowing myself to continually think about the same thing over and over again. Believe me it took around a 100 attacks per day before I got the motivation to put in the mental work required to fix this problem.

This leads me to my point. Though it may seem contrary, but what you are dealing with is far worse than these attacks, and what you are dealing with could cause problems like these attacks if you don't see a good therapist regularly. I suggest a therapist who can perscribe medications.

Currently I am in the same situation that you are. My therapist and I can't figure out what the problem is; if anxiety is causing ADD symptoms or ADD is causing anxiety symptoms or maybe I have a bit of both. Either way...these attacks may sound horrible, but they are nothing compared to the pain and anguish of the constant state of physical tension throughout the body also caused by anxiety. You say you don't like Klonopin, but it saved my life. It reduced my tension immediately. The body tension is gone, but the constant bombarding thoughts remain. And the attention disorder remains. (Very minor issues compared to the constant body tension)

My ADD symptoms are limited when it comes to forgetfulness, but severe with keeping my attention on something boring or having to switch my thoughts when interrupted.

Now that I have the anxiety partially under control I need to fix the ADD. I am naturally very high energy, and people consider me very intense about my passions. All of these medications for ADD are stimulants and I feel like JO JO the circus boy everytime I use them. (Hince: I have been up all night because of Straterra). My wife said Strattera most definitely improved my ADD symptoms, but damned if I don't get hyped up and worst of all much of the body tension comes back. The ADD meds are counter acting the anxiety medication.

I hope my situation will help you understand the possibilities you face, and I suggest you listen to others about what they complain about when dealing with you. It is very hard to determine between what is normal and what is not. If loved ones and friends are noticing something or always pointing something out...that should be your starting point.

My guess is that you have an attention disorder. Don't give up, don't be afraid of medication, and drop meds or decrease the dose immediately when they don't work perfectly. I spent 30 years of my life believing that we all have issues and just need to deal with them. These people and their standard issues have not even a slight idea of the pain involved in these disorders. I made a successful life out of sheer determination, but until about 2 months ago I had just about given up.

Klonopin is a must for me. Straterra...I'm hoping lwith long term use of a very low dose will be my next big improvement. I wish you luck and apologize for the long email if not helpful. 5:24am...guess I'll try and get an hour of sleep before the new day dawns!

Whatever the reason for this disorder leave it to the scientists. Isolate the main issue, fix it, and move forward with further treatment from there. I truly feel for you. Quote:

abbeyainscal said: Sorry, posted twice.

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Thank you for your heartfelt response. I tend to agree about the attention thing but you are right, which came first the anxiety/add or the add causing anxiety! And, now I"m paranoid about my job but I know I"m doing better just by actively (hard to do) focusing and double checking even simple stuff. Thank you ALL - it makes me feel so good there are people that care enough to answer an anonymous person about this stuff - Linda

PS: Best of luck with your journey - I"m thinking about you.

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I found out about ADHD by watching the behavior of a fellow worker who had been diagnosed as a child. The symptoms he exhibitied were uncannily similar to my behavior.

I will say that my symptoms, especially hyperactivitity and impusiveness symptoms, have diminished with age. I am now 49 and only experience distraction symptoms, especially when I am part of a large group listening to a speaker. That will never change.

Remember that ADHD can mask more serious underlying mental conditions. If you decide to venture into the diagnostic labyrnith, be sure to seek multiple perspectives from clinicians who have a track record of diagnosing and treating ADHD.

http://www.adhd-information-exchange.com

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As a woman only diagnosed with ADHD at 45, I feel a lot of sympathy with your description of your job problems. I have also had a lot of trouble with focus, follow-through, and understanding employer expectations. I was diagnosed with bi-polar disorder but it never seemed correct because I never had any psychotic symptoms and never lost awareness of reality. Despite my continued lack of response to standard medication and frustration over the diagnosis it took 9 years for my doctor to re-diagnose ADHD. In the past few years I've been really able to see a difference in my ability to function effectively. There isn't a magic cure. It's still hard to keep my brain corraled but the improvement is huge. The medication most helpful to me is STRATTERA. I wouldn't have improved without it. Hang in there and good luck!

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Told me to stop the Wellbutrin (was on because have always been told I"m depressed) and just start taking the Adderall. Very nervous - I already think I have anxiety but as I've said in earlier posts, which came first? Add or depression/anxiety because of it?

I guess I'll keep you posted on this "experiment" - thanks again, Linda

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Don't feel bad I wasn't diagnosed until my early fifties. I am a Vietnam vet and for years did not understand the problems I was having. I had never heard of PTSD and all the problems that go with it. The Veterans administration would not even admit ther was such a thing as PTSD for many years. Finally a fellow Vietnam vet persuaded me to go to the Veterans clinic near me. after a long fight with them I was finally diagnosed with PTSD depression,anxiety and ADD though they did not prescribe me anything for ADD. After a longer fight I finally got my disability benefits. I was only given anything for ADD{adderol{ after telling my local doctor about my problems with concentrating and trying to make myself accomplish anything. Now I am taking adderal,klonopin for anxiety and one other drug for the PTSD. The adderal works better some days than others but it always helps. I have had no side effects from it at all. Good luck as you go through your search for an anwer and never ever give up. No matter what anyone,even a doctor rells you. You know more about your body and how you feel than they do.

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