You CAN do it. I am sure it is very tiring trying to raise the kids alone and provide structure and stay sane. The ADDitude website has some very helpful articles about parenting ADHD kids with tips on how to provide structure.

Being a tyrant isn't a bad thing if it helps maintain peace and order in the long run. Kids need rules.

Organization Help for ADHD Kids and Their Parents

Creating Limits for ADHD Children

Survival Strategies for SuperMom

I sure hope this helps. Stay strong. Be confident that you can provide the structure these kids need.

Good luck Dena

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I will look up those articles. I guess I wasn't too clear on the type of tryant my ex was... I believe in rules, and in consistency and firmness (not that I'm very good at those, YET! :) ), but I DON'T believe in screaming and yelling, calling your kids "evil", and making your children cry just so that you can maintain "control," because one's expectations are just too high. I also belong to another ADHD site called CelebrateCALM and I really love the way they advocate parental authority...with firmness and consequences (both good and bad). That site deals mainly with CHILDREN and there's not as much help for the ADHD adult, so that's why I'm so glad that this site is there for me too. Thanks again, Debi

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I think you might have an unused resource. My husband, son and I are add. I think I know where you are. You make up the chore list, post it, explain it to your kids and then Really try to check to see it they did the work (on top of everything else single parent has to do). If your kids don't hate each other try something a little bit different. Set up the chore list but this time include yourself in it and include checking if the chores got done as a job for the child who isn't add. That's right he gets to police you and he better be nice about it. Remember if you feel guilty about it remember that this non-add child has a good chance a marring(sp my add is showing) someone like you and a better chance of haveing kids like their sibling. This might be fantasic training for them.

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I found a lot of helpful printable templates at diyplanner, they have a lot of good ones to help organize people and their families, and a few of them were chore lists that you can fill in with your own list of chores, and then boxes that you can mark off once it's done. If you got some stickers and bright colored markers it might make it more fun for your kids. My friend swears by getting her kids to "race" to get chores done, the winner will get to pick the movie to watch that night, get to stay up 15mins later, things like that. Hope this helps some.

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