Perhaps it isn't your ADHD causing the control issues. It might be that the ADHD is interfering with your ability to control things. Seems like a ironic combination, I'm sure it is frustrating and I'm sure lots of ADHD adults would agree that it makes them nuts when they can't keep things organized. Obviously many people feel the need to be better organized or there wouldn't be such a large number of products and services out there geared toward helping people get organized.

I like this article - Stop Feeling Bad About Clutter which is where the following quote comes from and it might apply to you:

“It’s chasing an illusion to think that any organization — whether it’s a family unit or a corporation — can be completely free of disorder on a consistent basis,” says Jerrold Pollak, a neuropsychologist at Seacoast Mental Health Center in Portsmouth, New Hampshire, whose work involves helping people tolerate the inherent disorder in their lives. “Even if you could control disorder, should you? Total organization is a futile attempt to deny and control the unpredictability of life."

Good luck, Dena

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What you describe is exactly how I feel. I am not the most organized person, but I do need control over everything for my sanity. I need my living room floor tidy (no toys lying around) so that I can feel comfortable about sitting on my couch to relax. If there is anything in the way, I feel so uncomfortable and it just bugs me. Is it really that big a deal that something is on the floor, ....well, no. But, my mind makes it so. I will definitely write more later. Gotta go fo now. Take care.

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You might also consider the possibility that you have OCPD (not OCD, which is different):

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsessive–compulsive_personality_disorder http://www.ocpdisorder.com/whatisOCPD.html

Like OCD, OCPD may co-occur with ADHD, and organization and control are hallmarks of OCPD.

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Is it possible that you have Asperger's? I do understand. I like to exert some control over my physical environment, but in my own particular way. It's not exactly 'order' in the conventional sense.

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is so we have control of our own as you put sanity is because we have rarely control in so many areas of our life/ It is so hard for us to keep organization in most areas of our lives. We rarely many of have control of our mouths, time , and so many things such as finances the sense of organization of our physical enviroment gives us assembly that we are doing okay. I can't stay organized for too long it just makes me crazy with anxiety to be so ridge it. I try really ; but it is allot of work . Yet I continue to try to be organized. I am thinking of moving and hopefully I will be organized (Judi)

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Sometimes OCD is a disorder that co-exists with ADHD; however, there is an aspect of ADHD sometimes referred to as "pseudo OCD" that exists as a coping mechanism to avoid overwhelm. Sometimes being overly organized, or very particular about certain things can act as a compensation strategy that relieves anxiety by keeping things that are important for functioning for that person in order. There are times when individuals will become very frustrated or irritable when others don't adhere to unspoken rules in their environment, but sometimes these "rules" can be communicated very clearly (and often sternly!), but the importance of these "rules" is not always understood by others because they are often a bit quirky and can also be very rigid. I have quite a few clients that exhibit this type of behavior and often basic self-care measures need to be improved (getting enough sleep, eating regularly, regular exercise, etc.) and can lead to more flexibility around these issues. Becoming aware of why there is such rigidity can be valuable so ADHD individuals can stop before snapping at the "rule breaker" and take a deep breath. And communication with others about why the "rule" is important to them and how relieved they are when things are kept a certain way may help others become invested. Although behavioral changes and communication can assist with these issues, sometimes medication adjustments are needed as these rigid and controlling behaviors can be the result of untreated ADHD or ADHD that is not being treated effectively. Good luck! Debbie Rowley, MSW http://www.madisoncoaching.com

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Zette said: Can anybody relate to this? Is this a common feeling among ADD/ADHD patients? I can't seem to find info about this online. . .

My experience would be along the lines of the comments from ADD RN. At my last job, I demanded a high degree of organization and had a reputation for insisting on order. I liked to keep the IT department looking like a clean and organized grocery store. I had similar behavior at home. I also have a problem when plans change or if I'm not given advance notice of plans that my wife might have for us. Even small changes of plans could get me upset. For me, cleaning, laundry, and organizing became a way to reduce stress.

After getting on the proper level of Ritalin, the compulsive behavior has subsided significantly and I am able to recognize that while being highly organized (or attempting to be) is useful, I was using it to gain some control wherever I could. As ADD RN suggested, controlling my mouth, managing my focus seemed to be impossible, but I could take some control over the physical world.

Demanding organization, for me, was an attempt to reduce anxiety and assert some form of control. Getting the right med level, then addressing my anxiety has helped. Whenever I have a strong desire to clean and organize, I ask myself what I am anxious about. My wife tells me I am much easier to be around even though the house might not be as clean. Now if the house gets messy, she'll kiddingly suggest that I skip my meds for a couple days and clean through the house.

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