Ahh, the messy ADHD teen. You aren't the only one trying to find a solution to that problem. Experts say you must establish ground rules for cleaning up and that everyone in the family should stick to those rules. They also say that parents should NOT clean up their kid's messes. ADHD kids need to learn how to take care of their own messes. Setting a deadline might help.

These articles include tips specifically for getting an ADHD kid organized.

Organization Help for ADHD Kids

Better ADHD Behavior Through Chores

Top 10 Routine Builders for ADHD Kids

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While I agree that my teen son should be cleaning his room on his own, he did end up getting ants in his room, which I wasn't aware of, until they started going into my husbands office, which is close to our sons room. My son was scared silly of the ants, can you believe it? Since I wanted to stop the ant problem I had to clean the entire room. No more ants now. My husband expects me to be cleaning our sons room, so I don't have much choice. My husband also has ADD. He was an only child and his mom did everything for him. What do the experts say when your husband expects you to keep on top of things. I do agree with you Dena, I cleaned my own room as a teenager too, My husband doesn't let me in his office to clean, so other than dusting and mopping, when it comes to the office, it is up to him. Of course, he never leaves food around either. Thanks for your quick reply. Elizabeth

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I have a 17 year old with ADHD. And I have to tell you I feel your pain, and I have a DD!!! LOL!!! Here's what I do, I hope maybe it will help a little. Try not to nag, it just makes it worse. I have a strict rule about no food/drinks upstairs in their rooms (because of the ants). I also try about once a month to go up there and hang out and "help" with some picking up and going through clothes to give away and dirty laundry, etc. It helps keep down the total mess and I like the time as usually at time everyone comes up and is in her room hanging out!! I make sure she has her meds before I do that!! That being said, I do sometimes nag, especially to bring down dirty towels and laundry (made her go upstairs on her way out and bring it down, boy was she hot!!). They do sometimes take food/drinks upstairs so I go up and do a check through and bring stuff down. I forget too, and kids are kids. I know its hard, Good Luck

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Thank you so much for that info. You sound so organized. That is what I am going to be doing when he gets back from camp. We did have ants so that is why I had to do something. My son is refusing to take his meds now, any ideas? He is sixteen and doesn't think he needs them anymore, no matter what my husband and I say otherwise. My daughter did the same thing at age sixteen as well, so this bothers me. She is older and doesn't live at home now. I know he will also do better in school this year if he takes his meds, but he won't, and our GP thinks our son could possibly outgrow ADHD. As soon as our GP said this, in front of our son he refused to take anymore meds for ADHD. Our GP is a good doctor , except in this area, as he doesn't know anything about ADHD, and wouldn't learn about it unless a family member had it. Thanks again

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I went with her to buy some strogage bins ; and then gave her a time limit to clean her room. I told her if I am going to clean it. I was going to disconnect her computer , and if still not cleaned turn off her cell phone. I must admit It not easy to have them keep there rooms clear; and at this point I was at my wit end ; But she know I would do it. She felt she could not "LIVE" without these things. So her room is clean. I have given her hints to keep it clean such as before sleep clean up the things such as cup , plates and wash them in the sink. If clothes are dirty ; put them in the basket so it won't be on the floor and easy to put in the laundry. I also do these things for myself ; and I can say my office is been remaining clean, and better organized with these little thing. By the way my daughter doesn't have ADD/ADHD ; but I find all teenagers responed to something. I am the ADHD person so keeping things neat and organized is a great feat.

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Elizabeth, thanks for saying that I sound sooo organized ha, ha, ha, ha, ha I have ADD so I totally am not organized. But what that gives me is a real insight as to what my DD is going through. That way I try to keep in mind that it is difficult for her too, she does forget, and threatening or using any kind of force or punishment or taking away things does not work for my 17 yo ADHD child. As far as your meds question goes. My DD went through something similar although she didn't refuse she would not take them or forget (on purpose). And when she got some of her grades back and saw how she did when she didn't take them and when she did the light started to turn on. You may need to sit down and have a nice quiet heart to heart with him. Maybe say while you understand that he may not think he needs them and even though your Dr. said you may outgrow (I highly doubt that) your ADHD how does he feel he is going to do in school without them? Also I am not sure if he is driving to learning to drive but does he feel that he can concentrate enough to drive a motor vehicle and not be distracted and get into an accident. Because if he does get into one his insurance will go up. During the summer my DD does not take her meds everyday, and even during school she may not take them on a Sat or Sunday if she is doing nothing and staying home. But she realizes now if she needs to focus and get stuff done or drive she has to take them. Don't fight about it, because that will just make it worse, try and talk and get him to understand maybe wait until school starts and say if you can get your stuff done and get good grades (whatever the benchmarks are) without your meds then ok, but if you can't prove it to me by your actions and grades then we will agree you will take them. And give it a month timeframe. If those don't work I would probably say maybe getting a second Dr.'s opinion to help him understand. I try to really concentrate on the grades issue, give alot of praise and support and try to be really patient in all the other areas with my DD. Remember most ADHD meds raise their anxiety even more so if I have to remind her to take out the trash at night when her meds have worn off, oh well. I have tried to make her high school years more of achievement and fun while trying to help and guide but trying to make sure to let her be independent. I don't want to be constantly on her back about every little thing, I wanted her to figure it out and let the light bulb turn on. I wanted to enjoy the last couple of years with her, plus being on their back all the time is really stressfull for me!! It will work out.......just hang on.

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You are welcome. I do still think you are organized. You seem to have well thought out plans for dealing with your DDs ADD. You sound like a good mom to me. To bad we aren't neighbors. You haven't seen my place and I don't have ADD, although everyone else in the family does. My son for whatever reason has never responded well to praise for anything. When he was little I would tell him how proud of him I was for cleanning his room and in such a short time. He never did that again. Whenever I praise him for anything, good grades, or whatever, he stops. Now I am afraid to praise him for anything for that reason. I don't know of anyone who responds this way. Thanks for telling me that some ADD meds cause anxiety. I did'nt know that. My doctor tells me nothing about that, however he is the best doctor we have found so far. Have a good day, and thanks again for all your ideas.

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So far so good. He likes everything we have done to his room, and so far it is clutter free. In the meantime am takiing your advice.

Elizabeth

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I'm in the same boat. I'm starting to think that if I just got one huge bin and just asked that they throw everything in there when they are done playing with it then it will make a difference. If that isn't easy enough for my 2 10 year old boys then I don't know what I will do! I like everything in my house to match perfectly, I know I'm a freak. So, does anyone know where I can get a wood toy chest as opposed to something plastic? I have looked at all the major stores in Indianapolis and can't find one. I just did a search online and found this website that has a wood <url="http://www.woodtoybox.com/">Toy box</url> but I don't normally buy stuff online. I'm afraid of giving out my credit card info. If anyone has experience getting stuff from that website, can you please let me know? I would love to hear a review of the company before I make my first online purchase. Thanks flyladies.

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