You say in your message that you have been diagnosed with ADHD. But I feel you also might have social phobia. You seem to be preoccupied with what other people think, that is the main thread that goes through your message. Who cares what other people think? Don't live your life like that. Nobody is better than you. And people are too concentrated on themselves/ their problems to worry about you. Trust me. Look at Brittany Spears, she has been in a real mess a couple of years ago, and the whole world witnessed that. And now she seems fine, and everybody has pretty much forgotten about her mental health problems. You definately need better diagnossis, find another therapist who will understand you better. Wish you good luck.

Quote

Are you getting treatment for you ADHD? Has your doctor prescribed any medications? The right ADHD medication may help quite a bit. But remember that sometimes it may take a little trial and error to find the right medication.

Also, take heed in the fact that you aren't alone. Many ADHD adults suffer from bouts of depression and low self esteem. The conditions may also improve with the right treatment.

Hang in there. Dena

Quote

You say you are ADHD ; but the wide mood swings and the preoccupation with what other are thinking and thoughts of suicide are features of other disorders. If you are not currently seeing a psychiatrist I strongly advise you to seek one out. You may have ADD/ADHD : but you sound like you have another co-morbid that needs to be treated. Also if you have a history of substance abuse I would seek out a narc anonymous 12 step program and you will find people who are straight; but have struggled with addiction as well. A good friend who has been clean for 18 years now says" Everyday you wake up want to get high; but today I choose not too" You have to choose not too get high. It not easy to forgive ourselves but we need to . It is also up to us to own up and go to those we hurt and accept the things they say. Some may forgive; other may not . Don't remain alone go to narc anonymous and get those other things treated. GOOD LUCK!!!!!

Quote

Hi there. Wow, what a story. You know, you sound just like me several years ago. I'm 45 and just now have my life together. You have some wonderful feedback from these folks and they are right, get another therapist. It took me having to move from my city to get away from the 'friends' who were substance abusers. I wanted to be accepted. I was the 'life on the party' on the outside, but needed to get approval from anywhere I could. If you can get into school, they have excellent programs that accomodate. Study something you love. What is your passion? I was finally able to get my Master's degree. Once I was diagnosed in 1994, I was so relieved at the knowledge of what was going on, but also had to get over the 'label' of being 'learning disabled'. At that time, they had no idea of ADHD, at least for my case. I went from job to job, relationship to relationship. Now with the right meds, I have been able to find an excellent job, and am finally in a wonderful relationship. Life is short, get the help you need and don't give up. Your true friends will forgive you and be happy that you get the help you needed. I wish you the best.

Quote

When I was reading your piece I had to look twice to see I hadn't written this while my mind was somewhere else as it sounds so much like me it is uncanny. I was diagnosed with A.D.D. in July 2008 and to date I'm still not sure how I'm coping with it. I obviously still have all the characteristics of an A.D.D.er but now it has a name it all feels so real and I personally think that is the scary part - well it is for me. You said you have always had thoughts of death/suicide. I also felt that and tired to commit suicide for the first time when I was 12. The last time was when I was 24 and had to have my stomach pumped. Dr said if my partner of the time had been 15 minutes late I wouldn't be writing this. As others have said before me it reads as though you have co-morbidity with your A.D.D.. I have O.C.D. and bouts of depression. My confidence and self esteem are low, I have B.D.D. and S.A.D. (Social Anxiety Disorder not Seasonal Affective Disorder) and I also have P.T.S.D.. If you are not presently taking medication maybe you should talk to your dr. about this, unless he doesn't think you need this. My dr. doesn't but that doesn't help with my over active mind that insists on staying up all day and all night for heaven knows how long, and all while my body is exhausted and wants to rest Is there a support group in your area? Do you know others with A.D.D.? Do you feel you can confide in someone in a trustworthy manner? Whatever you do please don't go down the Suicide Route as it isn't worth it. You are very special and important and you matter. I'm actually tired as I'm writing this, having been up for 3 days and 2 nights with no sleep as my mind has been racing constantly, so if I have rambled or said something to offend I sincerely apologise for I didn't mean this. But do take care - there is help for you and it is there so please do take it. With blessings. Charlotte. UK. 23:13 6/30/09

Quote