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Wiped Out Mom and Dad Need Advice

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Thread : Wiped Out Mom and Dad Need Advice
24 May 2009 @ 10:45 PM
Stacia14	Join Date: Sun 24th May 2009 Threads: Posts:
Wiped Out Mom and Dad Need Advice Hi there, Short history. I am a 40 yr old mother of 1 teenage daughter and 1 young elementary son. our Children are 11yrs apart. My husband and I have been down the bumpy off road trails of ADD, ODD and Bi-polar with our teenage daughter, Our son has had allergies to Cow milk and all Soy products sense birth. At the age of 3 yrs old we began our journey in helping our our son cope with his Anxeity Disorder. Rainbow during the storm, after 6 yrs we finally got an all clear from the Allergy Specialist. Then we got the confirmation of what I had suspected all along, that our son, like his dear old mom, has ADHD. We are not strangers to the on going and some time hair raising, adventures of working with the school system and all that goes with having both an imaginative, creative and inattentive child. I how ever am trying to find the energy to physically, emotionally, mentally and yes spiritually travel down two adventure trails at the same time. I await any and all tips that will help my husband and myself be the parents we need to be to both of our chlidren and still have time for each other and time to regenerate our own well being. Thank you. Stacia Quote

Thread : Wiped Out Mom and Dad Need Advice

24 May 2009 @ 10:45 PM

Stacia14

Join Date: Sun 24th May 2009
Threads: Posts:

Wiped Out Mom and Dad Need Advice

Hi there, Short history. I am a 40 yr old mother of 1 teenage daughter and 1 young elementary son. our Children are 11yrs apart. My husband and I have been down the bumpy off road trails of ADD, ODD and Bi-polar with our teenage daughter, Our son has had allergies to Cow milk and all Soy products sense birth. At the age of 3 yrs old we began our journey in helping our our son cope with his Anxeity Disorder. Rainbow during the storm, after 6 yrs we finally got an all clear from the Allergy Specialist. Then we got the confirmation of what I had suspected all along, that our son, like his dear old mom, has ADHD. We are not strangers to the on going and some time hair raising, adventures of working with the school system and all that goes with having both an imaginative, creative and inattentive child. I how ever am trying to find the energy to physically, emotionally, mentally and yes spiritually travel down two adventure trails at the same time. I await any and all tips that will help my husband and myself be the parents we need to be to both of our chlidren and still have time for each other and time to regenerate our own well being.

Thank you. Stacia

Quote

26 May 2009 @ 11:44 AM Reply # 1
ADDitude Editor	Join Date: Mon 12th Jan 2009 Threads: 2 Posts: 258
Support for Worn Out Parents Stacia, The first suggestion that comes to mind is finding a support group. You may get a lot of comfort and strength from other parents who have been down the same road. A support group is a great way to vent your frustrations and share solutions to problems. Also,don't forget to take care of yourself! With everything you are going through, you should take some time each week to do something special for yourself, even if it is just a quiet bath. Let your husband watch the kids while you relax. Both you and your husband need to find a way to recharge your batteries on a regular basis. Do you have someone how can help with respite so you and your husband can get some quality quiet time together? Good luck, Dena Quote Last edited by ADDitude Editor : 26 May 2009 @ 11:45 AM. Reason:

26 May 2009 @ 11:44 AM Reply # 1

ADDitude Editor

Join Date: Mon 12th Jan 2009
Threads: 2 Posts: 258

Support for Worn Out Parents

Stacia,

The first suggestion that comes to mind is finding a support group. You may get a lot of comfort and strength from other parents who have been down the same road. A support group is a great way to vent your frustrations and share solutions to problems.

Also,don't forget to take care of yourself! With everything you are going through, you should take some time each week to do something special for yourself, even if it is just a quiet bath. Let your husband watch the kids while you relax. Both you and your husband need to find a way to recharge your batteries on a regular basis. Do you have someone how can help with respite so you and your husband can get some quality quiet time together?

Good luck, Dena

Quote

Last edited by ADDitude Editor : 26 May 2009 @ 11:45 AM. Reason:

27 May 2009 @ 7:37 PM Reply # 2
momx2	Join Date: Tue 21st Oct 2008 Threads: 0 Posts: 2
Here's my short list... Hi, and good luck. In my experience one can't get it all running smoothly at the same time! I have an ADD 13 yr old daughter and 10 yr. old son with explosive behavior and some undiagnosed verbal-logic problem and a husband who travels a lot and works 60-80 hours a week. I reached depleted yrs ago. For 3 weeks now the kids and I go to neurofeedback sessions and all of us can see a level of calmness in the others, although its funny to hear each thinks it isn't having an effect on her/himself. It isn't inexpensive but I feel its a good use of money. It is painless and my daughter likes the feeling of relaxation she gets. My son likes practices to be a Jedi knight (he uses his brain to control the video game on the screen, not a joystick). The brain mapping done in the first session showed I have anxiety and depression issues, so I get colored flashing lights and meditative music. I get to close my eyes and practice thinking of nothing (harder than it sounds for me). I also institute 1 night a week when we light candles or use flashlights and don't use any electricity after dinner. Not only does it help the planet, but it calms the kids down, too. After dinner they get candlelit baths, and being read to by candlelight. It settles them right down. My best advice is: in retrospect, a regular calm-down routine (of any kind) is very important to having some kind of tool when you need to influence their behavior. I hope this helps. chfuir Quote

27 May 2009 @ 7:37 PM Reply # 2

momx2

Join Date: Tue 21st Oct 2008
Threads: 0 Posts: 2

Here's my short list...

Hi, and good luck. In my experience one can't get it all running smoothly at the same time! I have an ADD 13 yr old daughter and 10 yr. old son with explosive behavior and some undiagnosed verbal-logic problem and a husband who travels a lot and works 60-80 hours a week. I reached depleted yrs ago. For 3 weeks now the kids and I go to neurofeedback sessions and all of us can see a level of calmness in the others, although its funny to hear each thinks it isn't having an effect on her/himself. It isn't inexpensive but I feel its a good use of money. It is painless and my daughter likes the feeling of relaxation she gets. My son likes practices to be a Jedi knight (he uses his brain to control the video game on the screen, not a joystick). The brain mapping done in the first session showed I have anxiety and depression issues, so I get colored flashing lights and meditative music. I get to close my eyes and practice thinking of nothing (harder than it sounds for me). I also institute 1 night a week when we light candles or use flashlights and don't use any electricity after dinner. Not only does it help the planet, but it calms the kids down, too. After dinner they get candlelit baths, and being read to by candlelight. It settles them right down. My best advice is: in retrospect, a regular calm-down routine (of any kind) is very important to having some kind of tool when you need to influence their behavior. I hope this helps. chfuir

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