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Thread : Tips on Establishing New Habits and Routines??  
3 May 2009 @ 2:00 PM
Firecracker Join Date: Sat 31st May 2008
Threads: 11 Posts: 38
Tips on Establishing New Habits and Routines??

Hello all,

So I have been having an extremely difficult time managing my sleeping, eating and working habits and was hoping you might have some advice. I am currently trying to return to a more "normal" sleep routine (I'm now staying up until as late as 2am and sleeping in till as late as noon), eat more regularly/healthily (used to be pretty controlled, but have had issues with compulsive eating and bad meal planning) and contending with serious time-management/organization/procrastination issues (very long story). I also live alone, work only part-time (not completely by choice), have a desire/need to do activities that require discipline (prayer, writing) and will (hopefully) soon be transitioning into a busier, but not necessarily more consistent, schedule.

I'm not so much looking for advice as to what to do (I have plans of attack), but for advice (or encouragement) on initiating and sustaining my efforts at routine.

So any advice would be appreciated, as would be "accountability buddies" (ppl who understand and with whom I can check in regularly -- I prefer this to a "coach")

FC

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4 May 2009 @ 11:03 AM Reply # 1
ADDitude Editor Join Date: Mon 12th Jan 2009
Threads: 2 Posts: 258
Support Group

Have you considered starting or joining an ADHD support group? That sounds like just the thing you need to get motivated and meet other people to be accountable to. Also, they might have some great ideas to share about ADHD routines.

I did a search on ADDitude and found these articles about ADHD support groups--

Find ADHD Support Groups in Your Neighborhood -- has great information on how to start a support group in your neighborhood.

Support Groups 101 --This article is geared toward parents, but it has good information on locating ADHD support in your area.

Good luck Dena

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5 May 2009 @ 12:32 PM Reply # 2
CrystalFL Join Date: Tue 17th Mar 2009
Threads: 0 Posts: 4
Make changes in small increments to help them stick

FC,

It's great that you are wanting to make a lot of healthy changes! You mentioned you'd like to see changes to a more normal sleep routine, eating better, improving your time management, consistent prayer life, writing, and perhaps steady employment--overall just enjoying your life more and being more productive.

Sounds like your attitude is in the right place, but I would encourage you to tackle one small thing at a time. One way that I encourage myself is a simple question: "How will I feel about myself when this is done?" Rewarding myself with self-image improvements rather than food or things is really empowering. If I get a good night's sleep because I went to bed at a civilized hour, I have two choices. 1) I can beat myself up for having put off something that needed to be done, or 2) I can say "You made a change to get a good night's sleep--well done!" As I accomplish that life change, I am ready to move to another one. But, only one thing at a time, otherwise you set yourself up for more risk of failure. This way, you build on your successes, and can even look back over time and see concrete accomplishments instead of that awful start/fail/start something new/fail pattern.

Also, do you have a friend or friends who seem like they have it together? Copy some things that they do, whether it's how they manage their calendar, or how they keep their house. Tell them that you are copying them and ask them for feedback on how you're doing. It's a compliment to the organized person, and you get the benefit of having a more organized life. If you are a person of faith (and it sounds like it) :), then pray for patience, discipline and focus--not in all things, but for the specific area that you are looking to improve. God might be able to do all things at once, but the rest of us can't!

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7 May 2009 @ 11:05 AM Reply # 3
JackieTKD Join Date: Sat 26th Jul 2008
Threads: 0 Posts: 2
OMG! you and I have the same lifestyle.

For me , the late sleeping schedule is the worst. So I am forcing myself to take 3-5 mgs of Melatonin at 8pm.

Overall, I too can't seem to make improvments and scheduling routines stick either. it's not that I don't know what to do when. What happens is when the time comes...I talk my self out of it-'just this once'. Then just this once is pretty much every time.

I am definitlyt interested in seeing more replies in this thread!

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8 May 2009 @ 2:05 PM Reply # 4
CrystalFL Join Date: Tue 17th Mar 2009
Threads: 0 Posts: 4
Reward good decisions

Shift your focus away from how many times you've failed at staying organized. Instead, reward and acknowledge the times when you make a good decision. "I can't seem to make....., I'm forcing myself....." both are very negative thought processes that are SO much a part of being ADD/ADHD.

Listen to your self-talk and see where you beat yourself up when you could actually be praising yourself. One of my goals is to get my work clothes together the night before. I could say "Geez, you didn't even make it a whole week--again!" That would be a true statement, but it's not helpful, and it just focuses on my failure--and I don't need any help with that! Instead, I tell myself "You kept your routine for 3 days straight--good job! As time goes on, you're probably going to be able to do this even more days in a row. Keep up the effort." That's also true, and it's encouraging, too.

Try recording your thoughts out loud for a day or even a few hours. It's amazing to hear how nasty we can be with ourself--saying things that you'd never, ever say to someone that you love!

PS, It's generally recommended to take no more than 3mg of melatonin in a 24 hour period. Even with 8 full hours devoted to sound sleeping, you might find that you're still groggy if you go over that dosage. I try to use it only a few times a week, and split the 3mg tablets if I know that I don't have a full 8 hours available to sleep.

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8 May 2009 @ 11:59 PM Reply # 5
Keith Bailey Join Date: Tue 24th Mar 2009
Threads: 7 Posts: 46
Dogs

It wasn't until I got my first dog, Jasper, that I settled into a routine. Dogs thrive on routine, and Jasper helped me establish one by adhering to his. I write about how dogs help ADHDers in my book, "Dear Mary: My Life with ADHD.

Dogs support others who suffer debilitating physical maladies. Once overlooked, ADHd professionals are beginning to realize that canines also support those who live with ADHD. I am a living testament to this!

Don

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12 May 2009 @ 7:58 PM Reply # 6
hamilton Join Date: Tue 12th May 2009
Threads: 0 Posts: 1
I understand

Where are you located? I'm going through the same. I know what to do, just need support getting it done.

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13 May 2009 @ 6:59 AM Reply # 7
Firecracker Join Date: Sat 31st May 2008
Threads: 11 Posts: 38
Sent you a message

Hi Hamilton,

I just sent you a message replying to your post (the message system here can be confusing, and it's easy to receive mails without knowing to check...)

FC

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13 May 2009 @ 9:30 PM Reply # 8
djax Join Date: Wed 13th May 2009
Threads: Posts:
Establishing New Habits and Routines

This is my first post and I hope it is ok to suggest this I have had great success at FLYLADY. It is a free site that helps you get organized, create routines and get rid of all the Chaos in your life. It has helped me so much it is the guidance I need and it has made a huge difference in my life. I hope that you have the time to look at this site, it is for people who work and for stay at home parents they provide so much support to so many people, good luck I hope it helps you.

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3 Jul 2009 @ 9:36 PM Reply # 9
ADD RN Join Date: Wed 21st Nov 2007
Threads: 11 Posts: 358
It is said "Do what you need to do"

and it will take about 3 weeks to become a habit. I decided just like you to make a few changes. I am happily to report I have been able to organize my room; and it has floor space and I do a few minute sleep routine and haven't taken meds in over 2 weeks. These feel like major accomplishments because it takes me so long to fall asleep and i had taken sleep meds for over 4 years. Now I just take time to listen to quite music and read something. I exercise during the day so I am tired at night; also decreased caffeine nothing with caffeine after 2pm. It takes me about 45-60 minutes but i know i fall asleep because I don't feel exhausted in the morning. I also took stock of my living area and found i was so disorganized, I have over the last 3 days took everything off the floor, if I didn't need it got rid of it. Found a place for everything I wanted to keep , sweep and vacumed the floor , organized my cds, dvd and the such. It also is now translating over into my kitchen , and cellar I take about 1-2 hours a day to do this. I am also taking time to check my mail and shred things immediately that I don't want to keep and clipped my bills to a board, I take every friday to pay the bills for the week. I am also looking for a job so I am trying to get in a routine of sleeping by midnight and up by 9am. I am hoping to work 11a -11p. It should be a habit in anther week. The hardest thing is to exercise ; but i am trying to get into the habit ; and I have been able to do it even if I don't really want to. Tommorrow is the 4th so I will bike riding down to Liberty park to watch the fireworks so I will have exercised for the day. I have been kllistening to 1011.1 zto a and have been dancing for the past weeks I guess it better than nothing. All I know it take 3 weeks to make thing a habit so even if you don't want to do it take the time to do it so it becomesroutine and easier to do. Its like brushing our teeth who really wants to do it; but it is habit so we do.

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18 Jul 2009 @ 1:15 AM Reply # 10
kathy1955 Join Date: Sat 18th Jul 2009
Threads: Posts:
same here. great advice. i hardly sleep at night at all. maybe i

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JackieTKD said: For me , the late sleeping schedule is the worst. So I am forcing myself to take 3-5 mgs of Melatonin at 8pm.

Overall, I too can't seem to make improvments and scheduling routines stick either. it's not that I don't know what to do when. What happens is when the time comes...I talk my self out of it-'just this once'. Then just this once is pretty much every time.

I am definitlyt interested in seeing more replies in this thread!

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18 Jul 2009 @ 1:15 AM Reply # 11
kathy1955 Join Date: Sat 18th Jul 2009
Threads: Posts:
same here. great advice. i hardly sleep at night at all. maybe i

Quote:

JackieTKD said: For me , the late sleeping schedule is the worst. So I am forcing myself to take 3-5 mgs of Melatonin at 8pm.

Overall, I too can't seem to make improvments and scheduling routines stick either. it's not that I don't know what to do when. What happens is when the time comes...I talk my self out of it-'just this once'. Then just this once is pretty much every time.

I am definitlyt interested in seeing more replies in this thread!

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25 Oct 2009 @ 4:04 PM Reply # 12
HeatherMarie Join Date: Sun 25th Oct 2009
Threads: Posts:
RE firecracker

I really don't have much in the way of helpful tips. I actually came on here trying to find help for myself and my husband. My husband has ADHD, and it is severly starting to affect our marriage. I am so glad to find a site with so much helpful information.

I only wanted to reply to Firecracker: Congratulations on having the courage to establish new habits and routines. I (and i am sure many on this site will agree) understand how hard it is to do it alone. If you are still on track as of today, give yourself a huge congratulations. Taking small steps at a time seems to be the biggest help. Doing it all at once can get overwhelming, even for an adult without ADHD. So give yourself a big pat on the back, and keep up the good work! Please keep us updated, as I would really like to know how you're doing thus far. :)

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11 Jan 2010 @ 5:33 AM Reply # 13
geminizebra Join Date: Sat 9th May 2009
Threads: 2 Posts: 7
Habit Tracker?

I know this is a little late, but maybe it'll help someone later on....

I recently discovered a way to track my habits -- such as staying up to late and eating unhealthy food. I use an application similar to this one that's essentially a point system to track your habits:

http://www.joesgoals.com/index.cfm.

It's really quick and easy to use. And you can develop a weighted system so that maybe staying up too late is -3 points while eating a healthy meal is +3 points. It doesn't expect you to be perfect, but it gives you a system so you can balance out the good and bad!

There's also this one that is more a keeping track application and, IMO, doesn't have the kind of reward system that the previous one has, but each person has their own preferences: http://www.goalmingo.com

You can also set up an excel file or find an excel template online somewhere, but you might find it too hard to keep up, or might like the online aspect.

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11 Jan 2010 @ 2:34 PM Reply # 14
Firecracker Join Date: Sat 31st May 2008
Threads: 11 Posts: 38
Belated reply

Hi all!

Thank you for the encouragement and advice! As many have mentioned here and in other forums, habit-keeping for ADDers seems to be a series of false starts. This is still the issue I'm having :(

Ah well... I guess all you can do is just keep plugging away, right?

FC

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13 Jan 2010 @ 2:50 AM Reply # 15
geminizebra Join Date: Sat 9th May 2009
Threads: 2 Posts: 7
Think outside the box -- we ADHDers are good at that :)

"Thank you for the encouragement and advice! As many have mentioned here and in other forums, habit-keeping for ADDers seems to be a series of false starts. This is still the issue I'm having :( "

Firecracker, keep at it. Try connecting with someone who will keep you accountable. Getting the habits started and keeping them going is the hardest part -- like smoking, you know?

The most current strategy I'm going after is finding a hobby that takes something I love and combining it with my weaknesses. I love biology and plants. I'm not good at seeing things through to completion and keeping up daily habits. My plan is to develop a garden where I get to see the physical changes take place and will eventually have a delayed gratification.

I'm hoping that my garden -- along with other strategies -- will have the skills I develop spill over into other aspects of life. I'm also figuring out what the main problems I have (sleep, mostly!) so I can tackle the problem rather than a solution.

If you're not good at introspection, then I really think joining a group or talking to a counselor could be good for you. Sometimes they can give you insight into strategies that work for people and WHY. Tell these people some of your concerns -- like, my house is always so messy! Is the problem your house isn't laid-out to work for you? Do you have too much stuff? Are there certain tasks that you dislike that deter you from getting the job done?

According to the GTD Methodology, you should: 1) Collect info 2) Analyze that info 3) Organize everything (like, what's more important -- cleaning or getting enough sleep?) 4) Review the steps you need to take 5) Do it

It's like trying to lose weight. You can't do it all at once. And sometimes you "relapse" and have that piece of chocolate cake, but it's just as important to follow your natural way of doing things sometimes as it is to try to create a new natural way.

Anyway, sorry for the long post, but hopefully it helps get your juices flowing! :)

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14 Mar 2010 @ 4:54 PM Reply # 16
I Believe In Me Join Date: Sun 14th Mar 2010
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Melatoin is a wonderful thing!

FC,

I, too, have issues with sleeping habits. My doctors and I developed a plan to get me switched back to a nighttime sleep pattern and it has saved my life! Melatonin ( 6 - 9 mg. nightly) taken appx. 2 hours prior to when I'd like to be asleep has been a wonderful thing! I now sleep about 6 hours nightly, vs. 3 hours pre-melatonin, and I'm working on eliminating caffiene after 7p, as well. Drinking lots of water throughout the day often times helps energize so that some of my symptoms are lessened and I'm less likely to fall asleep at my computer. I have raised 2 ADHD boys, and this is something that we did to work with them, as well. Please check out my blog at http://adhdsymptoms-information.blogspot.com. I wish you the best!

I Believe In Me

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8 Sep 2011 @ 8:47 AM Reply # 17
russayde Join Date: Thu 8th Sep 2011
Threads: Posts:
DVD for Exercise

nice advice..<a href="http://sportvideos.com/">DVD for Exercise</a>

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Last edited by russayde : 8 Sep 2011 @ 8:58 AM. Reason: code not function
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