Hello noahsark:

My head is swimming just reading your post. You definitely have your hands full and I feel for you as a parent, trying to help your daughter while the symptoms of ADHD, ODD and more make every day a struggle.

You know by now that comrobid conditions are very common in children with attention deficit disorder. Sometimes these are primary conditions, which means they exist on their own separate from the ADHD. Other times, they are secondary to the ADHD, which means that better treatment of the ADD could improve symptoms of the related conditions. Only your doctor can determine what you're dealing with. But here are some resources that might help in the meantime...

ADHD and ODD: Parenting Your Defiant Child

Problems with Lying

9 Secrets to Surviving Your ADHD Teen

Alternative ADHD Treatment Report

I hope this helps!

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THE 6 YEARS OLD DOES THE SAME THING I DONT REALLY KNOW WHAT TOO DO BUT I TOUGHT IT GETS EASYER WHEN THEY GET OLDER BUT I GUESS NOT HO MY GOD AND I HAVE 3 GIRLS THAT HAVE THIS

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After reading your post, I could have been the one that wrote it. I also have a 13 yr old daughter, that is very identical to yours. We currently are getting some help with anger management counselors that seem to help and her meds are being reviewed. She was on spring break this week and let say, it was difficult. I would love to talk to you more and maybe we can help eachother with different expierences we have been through. you can send me an email at bawildcat@cox.net

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I really feel for you. As hard as it may to think about, have you considered this may be the early signs of a mental health issue? I work with kids who have mental illnesses, and what you are describing sounds way beyond ADHD and ODD. You sound like a good parent, who wants the best for your child. Hang in there, and don't be afraid to go digging for real answers. Sometimes it gets worse before it gets better.

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noahsark7 said: I have a 13 yr. daughter who has been diagnosed with adhd, oppositional defiance, and some other things . This child could charm the skin off a lion. She is very manipulative and almost an expert at it. She is the same way with lying and stealing. She also can tear apart a mattress in about 2 days if not stopped. She pulls the threads out of every thing and constantly tears at her nails. She has done things like cut open her mattress and hide lighters , knives and razor blades. She has set the house on fire once because she had to take a bath twice. She doesn't care about keeping clean. I could tell you so much more but right now I don't have time. She is on several meds. Give me some feed back please. I work at the school she goes to and she is costantly stealing and lying there. She also hides things like leaves, pine needles, tabs off pop cans, tore up paper, almost like a rats nest. she can turn the tears on or off at will. you can catch her in the act of stealing and she will look straight at you and say she did'nt take it. Maybe one day a week we can go without incident . Heavy medication at night to keep her in bed and gates on her door. Have had to put locks on cupboards and our bdroom to keep her out of things and to keep her from stealing. In the bathroom my towels and washrags are missing a lot of threads because she has pulled them out.

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noahsark7 said: I have a 13 yr. daughter who has been diagnosed with adhd, oppositional defiance, and some other things . This child could charm the skin off a lion. She is very manipulative and almost an expert at it. She is the same way with lying and stealing. She also can tear apart a mattress in about 2 days if not stopped. She pulls the threads out of every thing and constantly tears at her nails. She has done things like cut open her mattress and hide lighters , knives and razor blades. She has set the house on fire once because she had to take a bath twice. She doesn't care about keeping clean. I could tell you so much more but right now I don't have time. She is on several meds. Give me some feed back please. I work at the school she goes to and she is costantly stealing and lying there. She also hides things like leaves, pine needles, tabs off pop cans, tore up paper, almost like a rats nest. she can turn the tears on or off at will. you can catch her in the act of stealing and she will look straight at you and say she did'nt take it. Maybe one day a week we can go without incident . Heavy medication at night to keep her in bed and gates on her door. Have had to put locks on cupboards and our bdroom to keep her out of things and to keep her from stealing. In the bathroom my towels and washrags are missing a lot of threads because she has pulled them out.

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noahsark7 said: I have a 13 yr. daughter who has been diagnosed with adhd, oppositional defiance, and some other things . This child could charm the skin off a lion. She is very manipulative and almost an expert at it. She is the same way with lying and stealing. She also can tear apart a mattress in about 2 days if not stopped. She pulls the threads out of every thing and constantly tears at her nails. She has done things like cut open her mattress and hide lighters , knives and razor blades. She has set the house on fire once because she had to take a bath twice. She doesn't care about keeping clean. I could tell you so much more but right now I don't have time. She is on several meds. Give me some feed back please. I work at the school she goes to and she is costantly stealing and lying there. She also hides things like leaves, pine needles, tabs off pop cans, tore up paper, almost like a rats nest. she can turn the tears on or off at will. you can catch her in the act of stealing and she will look straight at you and say she did'nt take it. Maybe one day a week we can go without incident . Heavy medication at night to keep her in bed and gates on her door. Have had to put locks on cupboards and our bdroom to keep her out of things and to keep her from stealing. In the bathroom my towels and washrags are missing a lot of threads because she has pulled them out.

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noahsark7 said: I have a 13 yr. daughter who has been diagnosed with adhd, oppositional defiance, and some other things . This child could charm the skin off a lion. She is very manipulative and almost an expert at it. She is the same way with lying and stealing. She also can tear apart a mattress in about 2 days if not stopped. She pulls the threads out of every thing and constantly tears at her nails. She has done things like cut open her mattress and hide lighters , knives and razor blades. She has set the house on fire once because she had to take a bath twice. She doesn't care about keeping clean. I could tell you so much more but right now I don't have time. She is on several meds. Give me some feed back please. I work at the school she goes to and she is costantly stealing and lying there. She also hides things like leaves, pine needles, tabs off pop cans, tore up paper, almost like a rats nest. she can turn the tears on or off at will. you can catch her in the act of stealing and she will look straight at you and say she did'nt take it. Maybe one day a week we can go without incident . Heavy medication at night to keep her in bed and gates on her door. Have had to put locks on cupboards and our bdroom to keep her out of things and to keep her from stealing. In the bathroom my towels and washrags are missing a lot of threads because she has pulled them out.

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I know exactly how you feel. I really need some help on my journey too. My son is 7 years old and he has set clothing on fire in the bathroom. He has burned holes in my couch and my curtains. He is just very destructive. While at school, he is eating crayons, marking on his clothes and the table with markers, not doing his school work. He is currently taking Concerta once a day and it's not working for him at all. He was taking Vynase and it didn't work either. There has got to be some hope for them or a medicine that will work to keep them under control. What my biggest fear is that he might set the house on fire while we are sleeping and everybody will be killed. Does anybody have any suggestions for me?

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I totally understand what you're going through. I have a 15-year-old son who was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 5. He also has ODD, oppositional defiance disorder, which just adds fuel to the fire. Everybody loves Mark. He's polite, kind, helpful and respectful to others and very quiet (watch out for the quiet ones.) At home it's a different story. He is verbally and physically abusive and does not take no for an answer. He's relentless until he gets his way.

Mark was on Ritalin for a while but he stopped taking it and things went from bad to worse. I had to file what's called a CHINS with the court (child in need of services) because of his behavior at home. He's verbally and physically abusive and I just could not handle him. I tried everything. On our last court date the judge was so upset with him for pushing me and putting his hands on his 5-year-old brother that he put him into DSS custody but allowed him to go home with me (which is unbelievable because that almost never happens.) A few weeks after that my 5-year-old reported to his day care that his brother made him touch a Pepsi can that my son Mark made hot with a lighter (yes, he also is infactuated with burning things.) The day care reported it to DSS and Mark was placed out of the home as he is a danger to his brother. He also has a 16-year old sister that he verbally and physically attacks.

Suffice it to say it has not been easy. I love my son but I just cannot handle him. It's exhausting. He has been out of the home now since March 4th and we will be going back to court on April 7th. I do not know what will happen but we're doing everything we can for him. He's in anger management and counseling. He is on a new ADHD medication called Adderoll, which we're hoping will help. He's very impulsive. He has been suspended from school 10 days this year for hitting a student, putting a sexually inappropriate sign on another student and for horseplay. He is failing the 9th grade and almost stayed back in the 8th. He is not eligible for an IEP (which I don't know why) and he just can't focus and do the work. Hopefully this is the right medication.

I know some of you may not want your kids on medication but there are some that really need it. My son is "out of control" without his medication.

If there's any way I can help you, let me know. You are not alone, believe me.

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my daughter is on adderall in the morning along with 50mg of seroquel then at 4pm she gets another 50mg of seroquel and the an hr before bed time she takes 200 mg of seroquel a lexapro and a clonidine. but this doesnt keep her from stealing or lying or tearing things up or being defiant. i am just so tired of all the people who think she is so sweet and i am so hard on her but they don't live in my home and have to deal with it 24/7

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