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Thread : Will Empathy from Friend be Helpful?  
13 Mar 2009 @ 2:04 PM
giddy Join Date: Sun 8th Mar 2009
Threads: 2 Posts: 5
Will Empathy from Friend be Helpful?

Hi,

If you haven't read I'm an 18 yr old guy with ADHD, depression and psychotic tendencies.

Now, my biggest problem is no empathy from anyone (even my parents), I just received a reply to my email from my aunt, she says "i think your ADD is just laziness, with 'superior intelligence' you should be able to study what street children manage" Thing is, people in my family have been through a lot, so they feel we're in a "better" state and should not complain but tolerate.

Now I fell pretty depressed, I think I'm going to slit my wrist again tonight.

So, i have one friend, Jennie, shes really nice and she's my friend because we made a deal, i helped her pass a computer science degree after she failed once, she did, and in return she helped me with my 12th grade (yes 12th grade) but i'm going to fail my exams, they were really bad. She knows i visited a psychiatrist and i told her i have ADHD but it doesn't seem very serious to her, i haven't told her i have depression and i haven't told why(my family issues). Unfortunately, she lives extremely far away so we can't meet very often.

Now i have one last set of exams coming in November, if i fail those i think i might go suicidal.

I was thinking of meeting her soon and telling her everything, all i'm looking is for her to understand i have "something" I might start by showing her my blood stained wrist? No one except the docs know about my wrist.(she might not like it though, she hates blood!!)

So what do you guys think, should i go and do it?

Thanks so much.

Gideon

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14 Mar 2009 @ 9:15 PM Reply # 1
JestyNuff Join Date: Fri 13th Mar 2009
Threads: 0 Posts: 4
Things to think.

Gideon:

You probably shouldn't slit your wrists, that's a bit counterproductive; bear with me a bit; When I was 18, I worked in a constructon gang in northern Canada - they wouldn't let me in the nickle mines - I was too young. When I was 23 I joined the army. Part of the initial forms was a survey of my work life - I found that I'd worked 56 different jobs in five years. I can't carry on a conversation for more than a couple of minutes, have never had much of a social life and don't know what having a real friend is like. My profile is posted under "JestyNuff." Have a read if you want. Gideon, if your friend will listen without judging that's gold. Trust her and talk. She won't need to see your wrists - your honest communication should be more than enough.

I've found that folks don't usually need someone to feel sorry for them; they just need someone to listen and care.

By the way, I'm in my mid 50's now, have just found out what ADD really is and that I got it . And that's a blessing - now I know what the problem is and what I need to learn and do to help it. Please holler back if you'd like.

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16 Mar 2009 @ 12:38 PM Reply # 2
Anna Join Date: Fri 13th Mar 2009
Threads: 0 Posts: 4
This will pass

Hi Giddy, I am so sorry you are so sad. Please don't feel so hopeless. You are not alone in this, use this site as a tool for you to communicate with others that are in similar situations, and educate yourself about ADHD as much as possible. I don't know what your religious background is, however I want you to know that your life is a blessing, a gift from God. Please don't ever make taking your own life an option. I know you feel very overwhelmed right now, but this time in your life will pass. You have a long wonderful life ahead of you, you must try somehow to see the bigger picture. You obviously are a very smart young man...you have great times ahead of you. Don't throw away your life over this. I know your family loves you, they just have no understanding of what you are dealing with. They see the potential in you, and know how smart you are, and it sounds like they are trying to push you to be happy and successful in the only way they know how. Talk with your friend, and talk with the people on this site who are experiencing the same type of things. This way you can build a support system around yourself to help you even if your family doesn't understand what your going through. Focus on taking care of yourself mentally and emotionally. If you need to leave India to get the treatment and counseling you need, then make that a goal for yourself. Hang in there, this difficult time in your life will pass. Good luck to you, and may God bless you. -Anna :)

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16 Mar 2009 @ 1:28 PM Reply # 3
giddy Join Date: Sun 8th Mar 2009
Threads: 2 Posts: 5
some hope may lie ahead

hi,

I'm christian by religion and i have strong faith in Jesus Christ. Unfortunately my father being a "pastor" who has a drinking problem and doesn't talk to my mum gives me a lopsided view of things when i'm depressed. Its just when i'm alone at home i get a little crazy.

I decided to join dance classes to keep me ok, i was at a little dance session for a week and it was so fun i was so normal, but soon as it got over and i'm alone at home i go berserk!

I'm going to meet a new counselor on wednesday and then Jennie (my friend) on thursday, she thinks we're just going to meet to discuss how im going to study last 12th grade attempt in november. I hope it goes well.

Thanks so much

Gideon

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