If you have seen a chnge and not posititve one it needs to brought out and thee air cleared. Don't let him talk you into sleeping with him until the air is cleared ; and he understands he will never hit you with anything ever again. Make sure he understands this f he does you have him removed from your house . I would also change the locks and keep your keys because I 'm not sure but he beginning to take you as someone who follows what he wants and the atmosphere is conducive of being taken advantage of. However the biggest thing that say should he stay ot should he go is how do you feel . DO NOT LET HIT<BELITTLE OR USE in anyway ; and if it done 2nd time hit he must go. Because a hit becomes slap a punch, etc it does increase and become worse if this happens Don't stick around

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I think I gave you the wrong impression. Although I do realize that abuse is abundant, that does not mean every injury is abuse. I want to make this clear.. he did not intentionally hit me. He was flipping the remote in his hand and catching it again. He missed and it smacked me in the wrist bone. It was a complete accident. Trust me, I am not the type to allow anyone to intentionally hit me in any way. I am quite capable at speaking my mind and standing up for myself. The question I am asking is not about abuse, its about weiither or not to pursue this new relationship to its conclusion or get out of Dodge. I am disturbed by the fact that alot of spouses cheat and am concerned about the intimacy issues and emotionally problems that are associatied with this particular type of disorder I guess is the best way to put it. Which I don't like using, but no other word is any better...

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Hi Gaiadiva,

I have ADHD (inattentive type) and my husband and both of my children have ADHD as well. I also happen to know a lot of people personally who have ADHD. I can tell you that some of the behavior you are dealing with is not the result of ADHD. Calling someone numerous times might be cute when you are teenagers but this is a red flag and not typical ADHD behavior. You referred to "intimacy issues and emotional problems" not to mention the "game playing", quick mood changes and acting as if nothing happened when you had just had an argument earlier. These are all red flags to a deeper problem. Unfortunately, I am all too familiar with those symptoms because they are also representative of a disorder that my husband has in addition to his severe ADHD.

If you were just dealing with ADHD issues and OCD, there would be some things you might have to learn about and decide whether you wanted to deal with, things like forgetfulness, disorganization, interrupting, etc. But those would seem like a piece of cake next to the more serious behavior issues that you have described. He's all sweet, caring and wonderful but then he can turn on a dime. The disorder is actually quite common, ocurring in 6% of the population but it is little known and even less understood by those who do know what it is. Many times it is misdiagnosed as depression or bipolar disorder, but in more cases it is never diagnosed at all. It is referred to as borderline personality disorder but it boils down to a problem with emotional regulation , frequent misinterpretation of events or conversations, particularly ones that involve negative emotions, and a pattern of instability in relationships. In spite of this, some of these individuals can function very successfully in their job and few people other than those closest to them, are aware of any problems. Others are not able to hold a job and the lower functioning is more apt to be noticed and diagnosed.

Regardless of whether or not he has this additional disorder, there are too many red flags that spell trouble with this relationship. There is also a high comorbidity between the two disorders in adults so they frequently occur together. Of those who have ADHD in adulthood, who were not treated while growing up, at least 25% were found to have BPD as well. And 50% or more of those diagnosed with BPD had ADHD. But they are two separate disorders, even though some of the symptoms overlap like impulsivity and low frustration levels.

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Hi, Jimmy from Canada. Attitude and behaviour influence each other, and both are choices. You can choose how you behave and you can choose the attitudes you hold. This article illustrates how important it is that you are aware of your choices and that you make good ones. Jimmy [url="http://jobs.bizoppjunction.com"]Job Search[/url] <a href=http://jobs.bizoppjunction.com>Job Search</a>

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gaiadiva said: ... he calls every few minutes to "see when I'm going to be ready", stating he doesn't want me waiting around for him. (Which of course is irritating the sixth time and makes me feel rushed. But also is a little sweet.) The other day he hurt me by accident, (nothing major, just whacked me on my wrist bone with the tv remote..) and when he asked what was wrong, I told him. No apology what-so-ever. Then stated he was hungry and was going to leave to get food and be back. Which I snapped at him for and he turned around and said, F*k y*. Niiiice. That prompted and argument. Which I could not get him to take responsibility for so I dropped it ...Once I was home he completely seemed to block out that we had an argument at all! ...not sure if I should run for the hills or try and commit myself to having a relationship with a person with ADHD/OCD. What do you all think?

I'm not going to tell you what you should do personally, as that's your choice to make, but I wanted to let you know that my husband acts very similarly to this, and it's not improving. We have been married for almost eight years now, and he is diagnosed with ADHD, depression, and bipolar disorder. What you described is a typical day for him, especially the total block of earlier disagreements. It has actually gotten worse the longer we've been married, not better, and I'm having to consider now whether it would be better to get divorced and be a single parent to my two children from a previous marriage (both ADHD, with other diagnoses also), or to try to continue the daily struggle.

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