Hi Rebecca,

None of us can diagnoses whether or not your child has ADHD but I can tell you whether or not the symptoms you mentioned are typical of a child with ADHD.

First, I'd like to point out that according to scientific research, if an adult has been diagnosed with ADHD, the chances that his or her child will have ADHD is 52--54%. Bad handwriting is typical for many kids with ADHD, but not all. My son's handwriting is horrible, my daughter's is fine. (They both have inattentive ADHD, I have inattentive ADHD and my husband has the combined type--the classic ADHD) I was intelligent and always got good grades in school and have a college degree as well. I was only recently diagnosed with the inattentive ADHD, partly because my intelligence and my anxiety helped to compensate for the disorder. But I never had the success that my IQ would indicate I was capable of.

Intelligence has nothing at all to do with ADHD. Not completing, or even starting homework or an assignment, is a common complaint of parents with an ADHD child. They are easily frustrated, show their emotions more and get upset much more easily than the average child. They aren't good at reading social cues and can have problems making and keeping friends because of their inability to respect boundaries, their impulsiveness and bossiness.

According to Dr. Russell Barkley, one of the leading scientific researchers and experts on ADHD, "This disorder creates as much of a deficit as autism does but it does it to the executive system." They know what to do but they just can't do it.

The executive system includes the ability to self-regulate one's behavior and emotions, the ability to use time effectively, organization and planning for the future and the ability to motivate oneself. The symptoms get worse with time because as we mature, more is expected of us. The executive system doesn't acquire knowledge, it applies it. There is a deficit in their ability to apply what they know.

They can be motivated if there is immediate consequences to their actions or if they are interested in what they are doing. They do not tolerate boredom well. My son had many of the symptoms you mentioned except that he didn't have as much of a social issue because he is inattentive and therefore doesn't tend to be hyperactive and impulsive.

The quickest and most effective treatment is medication. Once my son was on medication, it made a huge difference. Instead of repeatedly asking him to do a chore or do his homework, he did what I asked him the first time and sometimes I didn't even have to ask--he had already done it! No more emotional and dramatic outbursts. The incessant whining to let him do something he wanted or to buy him something stopped. It was like he matured overnight. He was able to do school projects without any input from me. Prior to that, it was a nightmare getting him to do a project. He never knew how to begin and I had to walk him through it step by step. It was like pulling teeth and I dreaded it when he had a project to do.

My son played sports as well. For him it was baseball. He was even able to recognize himself how the medication improved his ability to focus. He's a great pitcher and he loved to pitch. But I heard him tell the coach one night that he couldn't pitch because he had forgotten to take his medicine. On the rare occasion when he forgot his medicine the other parents would comment that he didn't seem to be pitching or playing ball as well as he usually did. They didn't know why but they knew something was different.

My son has been on medication since he was first diagnosed at age 10 in the fifth grade. He is now 17 and a junior in high school. He told a therapist last year that he noticed that he didn't get angry as easily when he was on his medication. (I've noticed the same thing with my husband!)

All four of us take medication for our ADHD and we all see a big difference in our lives because of it. Stimulant medication is one of the most researched and safest of the psychiatric medications and have been in use for more than 60 years. The risks of not treating ADHD ( greater academic failure, more auto accidents and traffric tickets, more unplanned pregnancies, more unprotected sex and earlier sexual encounters, more job changes and twice the risk of being fired, etc. are just some of the scientifically documented risks for untreated ADHD) are far greater than the risks associated with the medication.

Educate yourself about ADHD esp. reading books from the experts like Russell Barkley, Thomas Brown, Thomas Phelan, Joseph Biederman and organizations like CHADD (www.CHADD.org). Do not get your information from the TV or media. Look to the doctors, researchers and the experts not the media.

Good luck, Elaine

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HI,

What a great response above! Thanks for sharing all that information. I've only been the mom of an ADDer for one year, but my 9 y/o son had all the same symptoms that you are describing, Rebecca.

My son had horrible handwriting and also trouble in sports even though he really wanted to play. He was eager to play but was uncoordinated and became frustrated very easily. Upon his first ADD evaluation, our physician found that he had a fine motor deficit that was causing the handwriting and sports problems, and we had no idea. She said that is isn't uncommon for this combination of ADD and motor deficit to occur.

Our son also had trouble with boundaries, easy anger and staying on task. He would also frequently shake his head back and forth and hang his tongue out all of the time. When he started the headshaking, we knew something was wrong. Again, at his exam, DS told the doctor that he shook his head to try to make his brain 'be quiet'. He had never told us that before!

We did choose to medicate and I am also a newly dx'd ADD'er as well ( at 35, though I've known for years that I have it). DS and I take our Vyvanse together every morning :)

One year later, DS is a straight A student, competing in football this year, an avid Boy Scouter and a much, much better big brother. We do still have many struggles, anger outbursts and lots of 'bucky' moments, but his life is better. And, he feels better too.

Good luck! I've found this board to be so valuable, so please consider coming back if you need to chat!

Lisa

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