I have seen true love many times ; but I not sure what you mean by normal. Each love is different; but they all transcend the difficulties and theire love for each other is evident. Love is proably the most powerful thing you can give another person. It comes in every shape and form . So what is normal before I go on?

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Normal never was never important to me. people, kindness, a smile, empathy, listening to a friend, you would think, but juyst yesterday, my own husband told me that iu'm not normal, nothing i do is normal, and he resents me and blames his ruiened liufe on me.

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I know that there no true love fairy tale in real life , I know there is no such thing as a prince on a horse that is going to come & resque me and take me to his castle up in the sky . To me true love & normalcy is - honesty, openess , respect, considersation , emphathy , understanding , supportive , unselfishness , humbleness . To me the true definatation of love is waking up every day & saying what can I do to make my partner feel loved, appreciated , supported & comforted when their upset, scared - how can I show my partner how much I appreciate them and all they do for me . The defination of love is being able to sit down with your partner face to face & talking to each other about everything , being able to talk to each other about subjects that sensitive , having communication is the true key to have a long last relationship weather you are married or not & just in a serious long term comitted relationship . The defination of true love is the ability to stop and not think about your own feelings but to first think about your partner's feelings & thaughts .

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The problem I find and it seems to be common is we canNOT sit down face to face and "discuss" our problems etc. For myself with having dyslexcia & ADD there is a verbal processing deficit. On top of total rejection in our lives compounded with our inability to say things..."candy-coated?"

If you find that 'someone' who really tries to understand you, learns about our LD then you are lucky.....But our anxiety in combination with low self-esteem; however us being extremely bright and learned how to cover up when we do finally show our true selves, most people cant handle it.

I am VERY upfront now about what I have, but most dont believe me since I am articulate, speak several languages and have learned to cover up what I have.......it is like I never told them about my LD so when they get past the smoke screen..they cant handle it.........

I have come to the conclusion.......screw them...the one worthy of me will do all they can to understand me. I have made it this far on my own held a job for over 20 years, own a home and if they dont think I am worth a few books and joining this 4m then they aren't worthy of what I have to offer,,,and it is more than any non-LD person can.

Life is too short to be miserable.

I would rather be alone and face my unhappiness than be with someone who makes it worse and cost me a lot more in the end.

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One of the things that I have discovered is that life and love are what you make it. Stew what you are asking for in a person is for that person to try to understand you to a point they are almost a crutch. Love is a verb as well as a noun. To receive love you must feel that you are worthy to receive that love. Then you must give love in a way the other person understands. In this respect the golden rule doesnt work, the platinum rule does. Treat others as they would like to be treated. Love them as they wish to be loved.

This came hard to me as well. My low self esteem caused more issues than any of my other disabilities. My wife of 13 years asked me for a divorce three years ago after she had lived with me through a dot-com layoff and failing business venture. We decided to work it out and are still together. We had no money, so we had to figure this out on our own. The book the 5 Love Languages helped tremendously. Also the day to day determination that regardless of what happens tomorrow, I will choose to love her today in the best way I know how. Everything else is up to the Universe.

We did this day by day, filling each others "love tanks" as much as possible. I learned how to fill my own "love tank." True Love is the "child" that is created in the spot that is created when peoples love intersect. It fills that space that is shared. It is a living thing. That place needs to get nurtured like it is a child.

In the movie Casanova with Heath Ledger there is a line he tells the lovestruck young man pining for the love who does not respond to his attentions. Paraphrased "Notice how the moth keeps trying to get to the candle, but the flame keeps it away. Do not be the moth, be the candle." Let your light shine and those attracte to the person you are will come. The love will come. It works for me every day.

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