Here is where it is IMPERATIVE that you become your childs advocate. Here are some things:

1. Formal diagnosis based on numerous criteria. 2. It's going to change your life, her life, family life, etc. 3. You need her to be on board to help your daughter and you want her to be a part of it......but also that you can not allow her to destroy it or undermine you or the treatment. 4. Offer her some good informative material about ADD/ADHD -- Two that I have grown to love are Driven to Distraction and Delivered From Distraction. 5. Explain that you are planning to follow this through not as an excuse for your daughter but as a way to better prepare her for the world. 6. Seek out the wonderful things about ADD/ADHD. Far too often we focus on the negative or bad stuff -- people with ADD/ADHD have some wonderful and vastly beneficial qualities and abilities. 7. After you invite her to come on this journey with you for the betterment of your daughter, you may have to be ready to explain to her that she is always welcome, her grand daughter needs her, and you need her -- but that you are the parent and you have to make the decisions that are best for your daughter and if she chooses not to support your decisions or undermines your decisions that she is a detriment to your daughter and you can't have that. 8. Don't back down and don't let her wear you down. Set boundaries and enforce them. Educate yourself, your daughter and your mom. Always make it about your daughters future -- not about it being easy for you, it solving a "behavior problem", or anything else. We as parents have a duty to help plan for and prepare our children for their future. It's not ensuring their future -- it's making sure that they have the right and effective tools for them to use as unique individuals to help them succeed.

Hope this helps.

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I tried to explain the situation to her and said many of the things you suggested, in my wn words, but her response went something like this... "It's just an excuse to dope up the more challenging kids so they don't have to deal with them or make them behave." What am I supposed to tell someone so "old School" who isn't open minded enough to listen? How do I curtail her resistance without being offensive?

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Our eight year daughter was recently diagnosed. My situation was similar in some ways, only it was my husband who said all the things your mother has said. I spoke with our pediatrician, who asked my husband to come in so he could explain it in terms my hubby was comfortable with. It made all the difference in the world. The dr. said to him," if your daughter had another illness, such as diabetes etc., wouldn't you want to her to have the treatment that she needs? ADHD is something that needs to be treated for her to be a happy secure child." He understood at that moment.

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