My son is 6 1/2 and has ADHD. A little over a year ago I heard about a "Feingold diet" which is essentially the elimination of all artificial colors, artificial flavors and some preservatives from the diet. My son instantly became happier,less aggressive, somewhat able to listen,sleep better,and very few mood swings.He is like a different child. This diet will probably help your son.

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Hi Aprill:

Welcome to the ADDitude forums. I was so disheartened to read your post because it's so obvious that you love your son very much, but that your frustration with his behavior is overwhelming. I can understand why...

First, have you considered joining a support group for parents of ADHD children? You might find that being able to cry, yell and laugh in front of other parents helps relieve some frustration, plus I'm sure other moms and dads will have some winning strategies to share.

Second, it's clear to me that your son's OCD and ADHD are a lethal combination. I wonder if another evaluation and diagnosis are in order because it's possible your son is dealing with other comorbid conditions that are interfering with his ADHD medication - that's just one possible explanation for his continued ADHD behavior problems.

I know you said that punishment and rewards don't seem to make a difference, but I wonder if a daily report card would be worth trying at school.

Finally, here is a great article about altering ADHD medications to reduce side effects that might give you some new treatment ideas. I also like our free Alternative ADHD Treatment booklet, which has great info about fish oil, exercise, nutrition, behavior therapy and more.

I hope this helps!

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I came to this forum today to throw a pity party for myself, feeling overwhelmed by the scope of my son's (and daughter's) problems, feeling cursed by this condition, and wondering why nothing seems to be getting better despite my most fervent efforts. I am reminded that I am not alone, and others face even bigger obstacles. The scope of your son's problems are larger than what I am dealing with and my heart goes out to you. I've been reading "Healing ADD: The Breakthrough Program That Allows You to See and Heal the 6 Types of ADD" by Dr. Daniel G. Amen. It's probably not the cure-all it promises to be, but there's alot of information in there. Like your son, my son usually sits next to the teacher; he goes to the special ed room every day and will take his 3rd grade assessment seperate from his class; in kindergarten, the principal called saying he got caught strangling a kid who was trying to get in front of him in line. I'm frustrated by his inattention, his impulsiveness, the way he doesn't put effort into things he doesn't like. He doesn't seem to learn from past mistakes, talks too much, and won't compromise so he doesn't keep friends. He instigates his sister, ensuring he get's into trouble. It's all very typical, buy why?!!!! Why does ADD exist? Why would there be a group of people born into this world with intelligence, but unable or unwilling to prove it? They know between right and wrong, but often choose wrong when right is so much easier? I am so frustrated by this thing, so irritated that other people don't ever have to contemplate this stuff. I've read the explanations, here and elsewhere. I've talked to many with ADD, seen the consequences and effects myself. Why?????? P.S. about the peeing...my son doesn't pee in bed, but does vomit in bed. Both my kids do. Maybe it's part of the executive function issues I just read about on this website. Another lovely consequence I guess. My son also hoards stuff I consider trash; not food though, so I should consider myself lucky I guess. I guess I did throw myself a pity party today. I'm sorry. I hope you can take solace in the fact you're not alone.

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Ladies you are not alone. I have two, a daughter 9 ADHD, ODD,and a son 8 ADD and coping problems. My son also did the destructive phase. Broke my cell phone ($100 one not a free one) , cut sheets, blankets (not his own of course), put the curtain on the bare light bulb to see if it would burn, cut his sister's clothes and her hair, stole $35 from my wallet and put it in his sister's backpack, stole candy and nail polish from the store, stole pencils from school and church school, hoared food in bathroom cabinet and under dresser until it reeked, saves trash and others I am sure I have conveniently forgotten. My daughter has slapped kids at school, thrown books at kids and stabbed a boy with a pencil because he was "bugging her". All of this I am told is ADHD/ADD. Yes they are both medicted and yes they have done these things on meds. So would you say the meds work? Not hardly. Yet if you go to the MD they just give you more meds. You ask why these kids are like this? It is the chemicals, vaccines, preservatives in the food. Think about it. The last generation did not have all these convience foods and chemicals we have now and there were fewer incidents of ADHD, ADD and Autism. So what do we do? Get rid of the affending items. I put my kids on an indiviualized nutrition program. They eat no soy, no wheat, no sugar and no dairy. The above things have not happened since they have been on the nutrition program. It has been 13 wks. They feel better and so do I. I also got rid of all the toxic cleaners in my home and my daughter no longer coughs. The MD's will tell this won't work, of course not they have not been trained in prevention. I am not bashing MD's I am a nurse and work in the hospital. There are other cures besides meds out there, just keep looking. The key is education on your part. Join groups on the internet, there are people out there with great ideas and recommendations, you just need an open mind.

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I'm a behavioral health case manager and I work with parents and teachers on children with the sorts of difficulties I've read about here. What sorts of therapies have you all tried? What other adults are involved in the children's lives? It is often the mother that seeks support such as these types of groups. How is the father handling the situation? If you are a single parent, what support system do you have? You also need to think of ways to do things for yourself. Life is stressful when you have children with issues like this. You are not bad parents. I know that many of you may feel that way but there so many external factors that exacerbate the problems your children are having. You have to reach out and network. Find a local support group in your area, join a church, get the kids into some sort of organized sport...reach out the community around you. There are programs and supports out there, you just have to look. Even if it doesn't completely eliminate the problem, you can find ways to reduce the severity. Don't take it all on your shoulders!

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