Keep in mind that many people do not truly know the complex working of ADHD. Many believe that it is just excuse to get out of doing work. The teacher you speak of should be reported immediately. Then you should make sure that the district knows that this teacher violated your sons right to privacy, and in addition a violation of the HIPPA laws as well. The new IDEA laws also state clearly that any behavioral redirection must be postive not negative. Many people believe that to have a behavioral program in place the child must exhibit troubling behaivors, like swearing or hitting, ECT. this is not the case. If your child is having difficulty staying focused, and it is impacting his education to the point that he cannot learn, then he is entitiled to have a behavioral accessment performed and positive interventions put into place so he can be sucessful in school.

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Hi Brenda:

Football Mom is absolutely right that your son's teacher violated his right to privacy. What you describe is not appropriate teacher behavior and should be reported to the school principal (if not the district superintendent) - not just to punish the teacher but, more importantly, because her behavior suggests that teachers in your son's school have not been properly trained in working with special-needs kids. The fact that she thought all children with ADHD should behave alike (her children being the standard) is very troubling.

Does your son have an IEP or 504 Plan at school? If not, I would suggest setting one up. You can read this free chapter from ADDitude's "ADHD at School" report to learn about getting classroom accommodations for children with ADHD. The first step would be to request a meeting with your son's teacher, his principal, and the school counselor in charge of special services...

I'm not positive, but you may even be able to stipulate in the IEP that your son's teacher is barred from discussing his ADHD in front of his classmates...

Good luck!

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This sort of thing makes me so angry I could spit nails!

Fear of teacher and peer humiliation is exactly why my then middle school aged ds did not even want to get an ADHD evaluation, much less be diagnosed, put on meds, or have accomodations. He saw how the other kids with ADHD, LDs, and bipolar were treated, mostly as severe discipline problems! They were forced out of class, given zeros for whispering, not having a pencil, etc. They were interrogated about whether or not they had taken their meds that day. They were written up, whispered about amongst the staff, given daily detentions, etc. etc.

We got the eval anyway and he went on meds.

He was refused restroom passes although we had a dr's note stating that he had IBS and issues due to his meds that make him have to go more frequently. They thought he just wanted out of class or was smoking. In 9th, when he did get caught smoking, I said, "punish the smoking but he still has a dr's note about using the rr, so you can't refuse him."

Sadly, I think many teachers and other school staff have NO idea what having ADHD and other conditions really means. One teacher went on a rant in Sunday School the other day, about how "those" kids just use their problems as "excuses" and the administration allows them to, because of the "stupid laws" that say they have to be given all these accomodations. Then a former teacher and current homeschooling mom with perfect little girls chimed in and said, "Oh, I know, it's so frustrating!" This was in discussion of a book by John Rosemomd, in which he takes the position of, "there are no disabilities, only unidsciplined and spoiled kids".

I wanted so much to speak up, but didn't want the humiliation for myself. I do feel that these people need serious training, though!

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i can't imagine what your son felt when the teacher publically humiliated him. from someone who is a mother of a son who has this as well, this is what i would do: 1. Go directly to the teacher and tell her exactly how your son felt and that this is completely UNACCEPTABLE. 2. Go directly to the principal of the school and complain. 3. If you get no help there, I would head straight to the local paper!! parents will be appauled that she did this. your son does NOT have a voice as big as yours and its your job to step up for him! this is unacceptable to treat another human being like this whether they have add/adhd or anything else. that is something that will affect him the rest of his life and he does not deserve that treatment. by standing up for him, you will teach him greater things about life possibly far more than what he's learning from her in the classroom. teach him to never "ALLOW" someone to mistreat you. sometimes lines are crossed and i believe this is one of them. i'd be anxious to know how you do handle this....GOOD LUCK!!!

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My husband and I did indeed demand a meeting with the principal. We were please to learn that the principal has a degree in education and psychology, and had previously held positions positions in the school district as a 504 Coordinator. He was very receptive to us and absolutely agreed that this teacher was out of line. He said he had already spoken to her and would speak to her again. We insisted that she be written up for her behavior which we reminded him was not only reprehensible but illegal as well. The next thing we did was to request a 504 meeting with all his teachers. We did not do this before the school year started. We wanted to wait to see how our son did in all his classes. I now think we should have requested a meeting before school started if for no other reason than to make the teachers aware that he has ADHD. We did meet with the guidance counselor before the year started and he assured us he would let the teachers know that our son was ADHD, and to let him know if our son was having problems that would warrant a conference and possible accommodations. Big mistake. What I learned is that you can't rely on school personnel to do your bidding for you. As a parent, we are our kids greatest advocate and we need to be out there in the foreground providing information to the teachers, counselors, and administrators. We need to be informed of our rights and let the school personnel know that we know what our children's rights are under the law and that they have an obligation, moral and legal, to abide by the law and do what's best for our kids.

In our case, I think we had a successful outcome. The 504 meeting was attended by all his teachers and the guidance counselor. I came prepared with a typed page of 6 or 7 accommodations that I felt were needed. We reviewed them one by one, and all but 2 were adopted into the 504 plan. I was also pleased to meet face to face with the offending teacher. We did not get into what she did, but she is now aware that we are messing around when it comes to our son's education. We will go the distance for him no matter what. I think they got the picture. Since then he has not had any problems.

As an aside, the ADD boy who approached my son after the class to apologize for the teachers behavior was taken out of that class at the insistence of his parents. They were appalled by what happened, but so proud of their son for coming to the emotional aid of our son. We chose not to remove our son from the class, partly to encourage him to learn how to deal with difficult people and partly to show the school that we are willing to work with them to resolve problems.

I feel good about the outcome. Thank you all for your advice and support. Everyday I hear about more and more kids with ADD symptoms. I just wonder why. What in our culture is causing this...video games, TV, lack of outdoor play, food additives...I don't know but I don't think it's just genetic.

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