Amanda,

I may be able to help. I have a few books that have chapters or sections dealing specifically with the effects on the family when a child has ADD or ADHD. And both of my children have ADD, the inattentive type. My husband has the combined ADHD and I recently found out I have the inattentive ADD as well. So I've had plenty of personal experience as well.

A few quick things I can tell you:

Mothers of ADHD children are at a much greater risk for depression

There is a lot more stress and anxiety

Sibling rivalry is generally more intense

Parents of children with ADHD are more likely to divorce or separate

The child with ADHD may not have many friends and be left out or ostracized; the entire family may be excluded from events because other parents don't want the ADHD child around.

If you've ever had to sell a house, you know that real estate agents will tell you the house should be neat and clutter free for the prospective buyers who are viewing the house. How do you show a house when your daughter's bedroom looks like a cyclone just went throught it? Unfortunately, we didn't know at the time that she had ADD.

I could go on and on but it would probably be easier to send you some of the information. It might be easier if you would like to email me at elaine5687@comcast.net If so, I could also give you my phone number if you wanted to talk more specifically.

Are you writing a paper for college?

I look forward to hearing from you.

Elaine

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My 17 year old son is ADHD & has been on medication since he was 7 years old. My husband & I have chosen to not do the "med vacations" for a variety of reasons. One is that my son is constantly learning - the other is for the sake of my son & his relationship with the family. He has a very short fuse and explosive anger. Staying on meds has helped him with this. I don't worry about it effecting his size for a number of reasons: 1. Mom is only 5'1", Dad is 5'11", paternal grandparents - 4'11" and 5'5" (go figure), when he was very young - baby/toddler he fell off the growth chart. That was before meds even started. My son is extremely tactile as a learner; not inappropriate physically touching others (nephew like that - doesn't understand personal space). CJ, son, is the third of four kids. boy, girl, boy, boy. There is almost 4 yrs difference between one and two; the last three are with in three years of each other. CJ always had trouble falling asleep - even before meds. As an infant he had to fall asleep holding our finger - then we would sleep a toy link into his hand and he would stay asleep. For a while during elementary years I had to give him benadryl to help him fall asleep - other wise he would be up to 1 or 2am. In middle school and beginning of high school he sleep under his bed (it was higher off the ground than usual) on the hardwood floor. He sleep on a small camping mattress (not very thick!) and then he would have his comforter fall to the ground so his room would be completely dark. Then he would put on a book on tape/CD and listen to that and fall asleep. It has been a wild ride at times - but all our children are unique in their own ways. Hope this helps. Good luck deyette

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