I felt exactly the way you did when I was finally diagnosed with the ADD/ADHD 10 years ago. I know you will find whatever works for you. I live with my husband and daughter both non-ADDers . So I took back what was mine ; and gave back to them what was theirs. I put all my bills on the computer in the bank so I don't have paper all around . I do my classes on-line ; but still buy books. It does take time to figure out what works, Read The book "Delivered from Distraction" iT has many practicle suggestions. Also don't strive to be anything you think someone else wants.Do your best but remember perfection doesn't truly exist , be neat, so you can find things; and work to your strengths, forgive your mistakes, laugh about some of the blunders . And if wrong say "I'm sorry" and if they are wrong don't take their blame. Good Luck in finding yourself

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I'm sort of in your same boat and have been wondering myself how to get started. I've been struggling for so long and I really thought the diagnosis would lead to treatment that was going to help me be "normal." Not so.

It's almost as though I feel that I finally have a reasons instead of excuses, so it almost makes it harder to keep up. I would love to know how people overcome this hurdle.

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...so he responded with a serious and well-educated tone of voice that I do present with 8 out of 10 'qualified characteristics' of someone with ADHD, which I've probably had my whole life. And this is the way I started my journey called: "So, now all I have to do is re-learn everything I learned during my first 50 years of life, right?" But, wait a minute, I was responding to Husband, Father, Teacher...Sorry! I tend to get a bit, okay very distracted when the day's last dose of Adderral wears off.

First thing I'd like for you to do is give yourself a good, atta boy! You're facing the biggest challenge you'll ever come up against...YOURSELF. It takes courage to look deep inside oneself especially when realizing that the discovery isn't a cure. I agree with the responder, who referenced the book, "Delivered From Distraction". The same authors had previously written "Driven To Distraction." (By the way, I've not finished reading either of these books.) Go figure! For my part, though, I'd like to offer this: Learn as much as you can about Executive Functioning...Plan, Organize, Follow Steps, Filter Distractions, Track What You Do , Make Adjustments, and Evaluate Your Results. I've framed these words and posted them in my work office on the wall directly opposite my desk. I write them across the top of my 2-page/week productivity planner. If I forget, well let's just say that my structure breaks down. I wish you and your loved ones the best because they need and want your manly caring and compassion.

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I was also diagnosed at age 35, 10 years ago. The first couple of years were a lot of self-discovery. It's normal to go through the gamut of emotions--relief, resentment, what-might-have-beens--and you just have to let those run their course. You're right, it can feel overwhelming at time. It helps to get someone else's perspective. Practical answers: 1. This is bigger than you. Don't expect to come up with your life plan on your own. A coach has been invaluable for me! If you can afford it, try one. Mine helped me engineer a total career change. It takes a lot of burden off my wife. 2. A therapist was also incredibly helpful. She helped me learn to accept who I am and how to make my marriage better. 3. I live by my PDA. No more little pieces of paper and notes scattered all over the place. It's worth learning how to use one. The initial setup is an investment in time, and a steep learning curve, but for me it's been life-changing. It's always within 5 feet of me, so I never lose it. It lives in a soft case so it won't break when I drop it. And I back it up regularly. As a grad student (I don't know your field) you may also be able to store some of your texts on a Palm, or find programs in your field that you can run on a handheld.

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Once I read this thread I felt compelled to figure out my password and post a response. I was diagnosed at 34, four years ago. The more I understand about ADD, the better I learn how to deal with it and explain it to those close to me. I went through exhaustive testing with leading ADD experts because I just didn't believe I had ADD at first. I no longer doubt it! Medication and cognitive therapy have helped me be much more productive and successful.

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edforlife said: I am a husband, father, teacher, and graduate student. I am okay at the first two, horrible at the second, and just starting the last. I have a hard time getting motivated to do what is important even though I value it. After my late diagnosis of ADD at 35 years old, I thought life would be a little easier. Not so! I need some direction.

There are so many issues around Adult ADD. To get a coach or not, paper planners or PDA's, this and that....what in the world. The paper is great because it is easier to see and doesn't require hours of input. The PDA reminds me "HELLO!!!," that I am supposed to be somewhere else. I can't manage both. I don't even know where to start to begin having a better life. There is just too much info sometimes. I need a step-by-step plan to change my life.

I am glad that I know more about myself and details of ADD, but now what?

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