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Thread : Need Some Discipline Advice---4 in Home with ADHD  
1 Aug 2008 @ 12:21 AM
skyfire_2_7 Join Date: Fri 1st Aug 2008
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Need Some Discipline Advice---4 in Home with ADHD

I 'm looking to anyone for advice. Both my children have been diagnosed with ADHD. My husband and I also have ADHD. The house is pure chaos. When our children need discipline my husband usually flies off the handle and calls them names. "You are an idiot, aren't you?" and "Are you stupid or what?" are his 2 favorite. Which pushes them to tears and starts a bigger tantrum than if he wouldn't have said anything at all. If I interfere he starts on me bringing up past mistakes and treating me the same way. I'm not sure if it is part of his condition or if it is really him. It's as if he doesn't understand it is not them it is the condition. How do I correct this issue? Any suggestions at all are welcomed I am at my wit's end!

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1 Aug 2008 @ 11:41 AM Reply # 1
tutmom Join Date: Thu 10th Jan 2008
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Need discipline forhouse of 4 with ADHD

I would definitely recommend looking at the website www.CelebrateCalm.com It is for families with kids (and parent) who have ADHD. You can also sign up to receive e-mail newsletters which are very helpful in dealing with ADHD issues at home and at school. It is run by a gentleman named Kirk Martin who himself has ADHD as does his son. He definitely knows how to deal with the issues. He has some wonderful CDs that if you could get your husband to listen to (and you and your kids), he will come away with a better understanding of himself and his kids. Kirk also hold seminars, parenting classes, classes for schools and teachers, all over the country. Check out his website, or even send him an e-mail. It has made a big difference in our house. Good luck.

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1 Aug 2008 @ 2:16 PM Reply # 2
Anni Join Date: Thu 25th Oct 2007
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Welcome

Hi skyfire:

Welcome to the ADDitude forums and thank you for sharing your story. You are not alone in your ADHD battles, though a household full of attention deficit does sound like an awful lot to handle. Would your husband be open to discussing discipline strategies with you - away from the kids? If so, I would do a bit of research into behavior therapy and suggest trying some of those strategies together - as a parent team - for a month or six weeks... Below, I've listed some links to ADDitude's best behavior articles as well as some about mothering with ADHD that I hope you find helpful...

13 Survival Strategies for ADD Moms: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/3998.html

Smart Ways to Discipline Children with ADHD: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/771.html

Behavior Therapy for Children with ADHD: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/1563.html

Discipline Without Regret: Tips for Parents of ADHD Children: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/2519.html

Behavior Therapy: How It Promotes Discipline and Focus in Children with ADHD: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/860.html

Good luck!

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26 Aug 2008 @ 2:57 PM Reply # 3
Momof3boys Join Date: Tue 26th Aug 2008
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WOW,

Not only did I just find this site (and am so grateful for that!) but I don't feel so alone!! Anni, your reply to skyfire really helped me...I hope it helps her, too. I forwarded some of the articles to my husband, too!!

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26 Aug 2008 @ 6:21 PM Reply # 4
bebekhn2008 Join Date: Sat 23rd Aug 2008
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Thanks Annie

I am new to this website and have a 9 year old daughter with ADHD and ODD on Metadate and an 8 year old son with ADD and coping problems. Both have anger issues. My daughter is very defiant, argrumentaive and "always right". She knows how to push my buttons and she and I get into yelling matches. I found the smart ways to discipline your child very helpful and will try the 1-2-3 MAgic with her. I am tired of arguing with her and just worn out. Has anyone tired any nutritional programs or alternative methods? Thanks again Annie and skyfire you are not alone.

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