You can't give up your kids are counting on you! Emotions make a horrible master, but a great servant. Give your life to Christ & rely on His strength excluesively, it will change your life! -Brandon

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I too have been praying through this. I attend a church, but have been hurt before when I shared my struggles with this at another church I attended.

I just feel like I've let so many people down and don't know where to turn for help. I do have a dr. appointment, but it's not until the 7th of August. I'm just so tired. I thought I would be doing better in the 4 years since my husband died, but having lost both of my parents and not being close geographically to other family, am struggling feeling like I'm trying to do it all alone.

I am just so tired right now. I'm not currently taking any meds so I know that's part of the problem.

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I'm so sorry to hear about all of your struggles and the loss of your husband. Can you join an ADHD support group in your area? http://www.chadd.org has a great list of resources under "Finding Support" and the ADDitude site also has a listing of support groups at http://directory.additudemag.com/results.php?category_id=122

It will help SO much to talk through your struggles and frustrations with someone who understands ADHD and can help without judging - judgmental people who don't 'believe' in ADHD or somehow feel compelled to badmouth it are not going to help you one bit!

I hope this helps!

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i can't really tell you anything that you haven't heard before, but right now, i think it's critical that you reach out to someone, so you don't feel like you're doing it alone. you mentioned you were hurt when you tried to talk about your struggles with someone at your church.

maybe try another avenue, where attitudes are open and accepting and where folks are more likely to be knowledgeable about whatever it is you're facing. this could be someone in a support group/chat room online (there's various recovery groups on the web that have live "meetings" every 3 hours), a member at an OA meeting, a colleague. just talking it out and having an outlet for your thoughts, however negative or irrational or burdensome you might think they are, can do so much (i've been there...).

thanks for sharing your story, and keep coming back. I've gone/am going through some of the same struggles you name, anxiety, depression, ED, and definitely felt what your wrote. do not give up! do not shut down. things do get easier.

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I tend to agree with the previous posting that you need to reach and stay strong for your children. It may be hard for you but maybe a a grief support group would be right up your alley since they have all been there knowing how hard it is after a loved has passed. There is no time limit on grief and since your husband your parents all have passed I would not be suprized if you are depressed. Add your struggles with coping with finances and you have added heaped on another stressor. If you can afford one try a financial advisor. Or have money put in a saving acount directly deposited from your check. Do not get a debit card for this account so anytime money needs to be taken out for use you would have to go to the account and pull it out ; also you should a different bank then all of your other banking. This would give you time to think about it and realize do you need to purchase something. When shopping do a check :ask if I nedd it or do I want it. If the first then buy it. Wants are different they are ususally something we could live without. Also see if this purchase is to fill a personal void or emptiness if it is don't buy it and find something else that would fill your spirit.. Help take your daughters and go to the park , walk and play together this would give you one on one time. the girls will fell happier and so will you. It also cost nothing and the benfits, smiles and laughter, and possible weight loss.

I would also continue on with this site; I found a great supportive group who listen well. Don't judge and understand me in a way no others seems to get. Good luck! and you will see a brighter light soon

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I have a son and a daughter but apart from that, I could have written your post word for word. You are NOT a screw up - you are "financially challenged" :-). Look, I do the same thing and my solution was to accept that I can't be perfect at everything (isn't being a great Mom enough?) and this is one area that I am a complete imbecile. Think of it as dyslexia for dollars.

The thing that has made the biggest difference was to work out my expenses (right down to the toothpaste) and to set up a seperate bank account where this amount went directly fom my pay every pay day. I also put another 10% away into a savings account that I cannot access so that I have some backup for the bad times. I also set up direct credits and debits for all bills so that I do not have to think about it - I know there is enough in my account to cover it. The other thing that makes a huge dufference is that I pay a set amount ($100) into my utilities each month regardless of the bill so that I am in credit in summer and can cover myself over winter. Then whatever is left over is mine and I can waste it on plastic trinkets if I want to. I would also advise getting rid of the credit cards immediately. This means that you can't lose track of hidden spending and, in itself, will cut your spending in half.

I hope this helps. Just remember that when we ADDers are under stress, things get less organised so please go easy on yourself.

Take care ... Lizzie

PS If you are tired, take some time off to recover. There is nothing wrong with hiding under the covers for a week if that is what you need. Sometimes not facing something head on is a legitimate coping mechanism. Look after yourself.

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