| Page 1 of 1 | 1 |
| Thread : A Visit to the Marriage Counselor 3 Months Ago . . . Now Here I Am | |
23 May 2008 @ 8:21 AM
|
|
|---|---|
| paperclip |
Join Date:
Fri 23rd May 2008
Threads: Posts: |
|
A Visit to the Marriage Counselor 3 Months Ago . . . Now Here I Am
I thought our problems were all HIS fault. I really did. But sitting there on the therapist's couch I heard him describe MY behaviors in a new light. She doesn't listen. She changes the subject abruptly. She plays free cell on the computer for 5-7 hour stretches. She spaces out all the time. The therapist looked at me and said 7 words I will never forget. "Have you ever been evaluated for ADHD?" "Me?" I asked incredulously. "No. I'm lazy. There is no way I could have ADHD." The therapist told me to look into it. Take an online quiz. Visit my doctor. Check out a book at the library. My husband and I left the counseling session feeling little resolve. We had a long way to go to heal what had been broken. But at least we were taking our marriage more seriously and dedicating time and effort to it. Now it seemed I needed to take some time to care for myself, too. A few days later, my husband and I were at Borders and I picked up "Driven to Distraction." I flipped through it, still cautious and skeptical about the possibility of ADHD, as I considered this to be a condition of energetic 8-year old boys. I scanned the chapter on Adult ADHD and read through the 50-some symptoms outlined. I couldn't believe my eyes. It was literally as if I was reading a character study of myself. Each trait, each symptom resonated with me...deeply. Tears welled up in my eyes the further I read. I stuck the book in my husband's hands and said, "Just look. You won't believe this." He read through the symptoms and just kept nodding his head. I made the appointment with my doctor the next day. After several appointments, our family physician diagnosed me with Adult ADHD and Moderate Depression. I have started medications (a mix of Wellbutrin and Strattera). After a month on the Wellbutrin, I find I can focus more at work. I don't have that sense of dread over difficult tasks for me (my house is still a mess but I'm holding out hope I'll find that motivation). I'm reading up on this condition as much as I can find the time for. Most importantly, I am thankful for this diagnosis. Just thankful. Thankful to know. Thankful to start the healing process. Thankful to have the opportunity to learn more and not feel ashamed. My whole life (I'm 33) I've thought the following of myself: lazy, stupid, fat, ugly, messy, gross, obnoxious, gossiper. Not an attractive self-portrait. Today, I'm beginning to see a new person. She is a Mom, Wife, Girl Scout leader. She is smart, kind, compassionate and healing. Healing. Healing. She is Healing. (Additudemag.com has been a wonderful tool for me in the past 3 months. I've never posted before but have read so many posts and found such comfort in them . . . knowing I wasn't alone. I wanted to share my story, too.) |
|
23 May 2008 @ 10:54 AM
Reply #
1
|
|
|---|---|
| Anni |
Join Date:
Thu 25th Oct 2007
Threads: 3 Posts: 275 |
|
Thank You
Hello paperclip: Thank you so much for sharing your story of Adult ADHD diagnosis, treatment and, as you say, healing. It was an inspiring and raw story that I that know will resonate with many other readers here. I'm so glad that you're feeling a new day dawning and that ADDitude has been a helpful resource. Have you ever thought about writing a blog about your treatment journey? http://www.additudemag.com/adhdblogs/20/3530.html
Last edited by Anni : 23 May 2008 @ 10:55 AM.
Reason:
|
|
|
23 May 2008 @ 12:29 PM
Reply #
2
|
|
|---|---|
| Chiappoc |
Join Date:
Wed 14th May 2008
Threads: 0 Posts: 1 |
|
Self-diagnosis
A pat on the back to your Therapist for cueing you in to this and an even bigger pat to you and your husband; first of all for trying marriage counseling as your marriage is obviously important to both of you, and now it seems that you will be working on your ADHD problem together. I have felt that something was wrong with me my whole life; mainly not being able to clean house, changing jobs way too frequently, and not having a lot of friends. I was treated in the past for depression and anxiety, but nothing really changed. Recently, I applied for a job to work with children and adolescents in a behavioral health setting; so to prepare for my interview, I thought I would brush up on childhood psychiatric disorders and when reading about ADHD, I was almost in tears because it hit so close to home for me. I was actually excited to have "found" what was wrong with me and to be able to put a name/face to it. I immediately made an appt with a Psychiatrist and yesterday I saw him for the first time. He is starting me on Ritalin. Let's keep each other posted on how we are doing since we are newly diagnosed! |
|
|
13 Jun 2008 @ 11:26 PM
Reply #
3
|
|
|---|---|
| kan65@ct.metrocast.net |
Join Date:
Fri 13th Jun 2008
Threads: 1 Posts: 7 |
|
Healing
Paperclip - I can totally relate to your experience. I applaud you and your husband for going to counciling and you for following through on helping yourself with ADHD. My ex-husband said the same things about me and made me feel that they were true even though deep down I knew they weren't. He would not go to counciling and did leave me which re-enforced all the feelings of I am lazy, stupid, disorganized, etc. My diagnosis of ADHD has opened my eyes like you. I am NOT lazy, stupid, etc. I am a Mom, sister, daughter, friend, baseball cheering section. Just knowing has lifted a weight from my shoulders. Best wishes to you and your husband and thank you for sharing you wonderful story. I am healing. Finally healing. |
|
|
17 Jun 2008 @ 2:56 PM
Reply #
4
|
|
|---|---|
| jojo |
Join Date:
Thu 13th Mar 2008
Threads: Posts: |
|
Best thing that could happen
Hi Paperclip, How are you? Hope things are going better for you and that the meds are still working well. I really enjoyed your post and I have often thought the same thing about why can't I keep my house organized and/or clean! It's never super dirty but if it's a bit dirty it sure doesn't bother me like I think that it should! Never ever stays organized no matter how much I try or want it too! All the good intentions in the world didn't change me! Then when I started meds that worked (ritilan) oh my gosh what a difference! It's so much easier and it doesn't pile up and drive me crazy like before! I still get distracted but not like before so that's better too. Hope all is well and thanks for the post. I am a great, loving, healing, fun, mom, wife, friend, daughter and even MORE! JoAnne |
|
| Page 1 of 1 | 1 |
« Previous Thread | Next Thread »
Local Time : 1 Dec 2008 10:26 PM
(Tue, 02 Dec 2008 03:26:27 GMT)
