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New ADHD Diagnosis - What To Do?
Hi!
I am so glad to have found this site, and I have a question and I really hope to get a better opinion, as I can't stop worrying about this. I see a therapist for postpartum depression, and I am well on the road to recovery with that, but I was talking to her about going back to school, but afraid, because school has always been SO hard for me. She suggested that we go ahead and have a full neuropsychological exam done, so that we can see if I have any LD's, so we did, and since then I had a friend tell me that she thinks that I may have ADHD, so I started to research like crazy, and really saw myself in the stories that I read, I actually cried to my husband, because I felt like something has always been different about me, and here I was reading about other people that sound just like me.
I got the results to my exam today (which they apparently tested me for ADHD with part of the exam) and the Dr told me that I have mild ADHD, and she told me that I excelled in most of the academics parts, and have an upper average IQ, which really surprised me, because I thought she was going to tell me that I have a lower than average IQ. Anyway, the problem is that I have always had this great fear that I am bipolar, not that there is anything wrong with being bipolar, it's just that for some reason I have a fear of it, so when I took the tests I made sure to minimize anything that might have to do with impulsivity, or hyperactivity, because at the time I was only taking the test to see if I have a LD. I told the lady this and she said that she caught a lot of my impulsivity in the testing, but I really feel like I may have altered the testing as she seemed to think that this is only a minor problem, that won't need medication, or much treatment, that I just might need to study harder, and test in a quiet area.
Since taking the tests, I really believe that I have ADHD, and I want help with it so badly. I am so frustrated now, because I think I screwed up my results, by not being fully honest on my tests and with the Dr giving them. Here are my issues, that cause me to believe that I have ADHD, let me know what you think about me having it, and where I should go from here:
-Impulsive shopping, I see something that I want and I just buy it, then later wonder why I can't control my shopping impulses.
-overwhelmed by my toddlers, ie, my head feels like it's going to explode when they climb on me, and distract me from anything I am trying to focus on.
-I spend hours each day on the computer, researching and with like 5 tabs open, and it is one of the only things that is relaxing for me.
-My roommate before I was married was in her doctorate program for psychology and she told me she thought I had ADHD.
-When I was a little girl, I couldn't stop talking... ever, still can't. I remember that I got in trouble constantly by my teachers, because I was turned around in my seat talking all the time. It was the main thing that they told my mom at parent-teacher conferences. Also, my mom would pay me in nail polish if I could try to stay quiet for 5 minutes, I couldn't ever do it.
-I love to read, but when I am reading almost all textbooks, or anything that doesn't interest me, I can't focus, it's nearly impossible.
-I can't remember anything, and I am always losing things. I have lost friends over this, and constantly hurt people's feelings, because I forget to call them back, or do something I said I would.
-My mind is always running a million different directions, I am always changing the subject.
-I get these huge ideas for projects, and business ideas, and then I impulsively go at them, until something else catches my eye, then Imove onto that. (This frustrates my husband to no end) I just can't finish them, I want to, but I can't.
-I can no longer do the laundry, wash the dishes, or do other mundane tasks, because of the distractions from my toddlers.
-I can't sit and focus on my toddler boys much at all, and I want to so bad, but I can't.
-My husband says that I am always deep in thought, and he has to say my name several times sometimes, to get me to hear him.
-I can not sit and do nothing, I always have to be reading a book I enjoy, or be on the internet, or have my ipod in, otherwise I just feel overwhelmed.
There is so much more, but I feel like I am beating a dead horse, so I hope this is enough info for any of you to give me some advice. I felt so relieved reading about ADHD and feeling like this explained away my whole life, and now the Dr says it sounds like a very mild case. I feel like it is more than mild, and I want help. How accurate are those exams? Can you alter them? What do you think?
Thank you so much for reading this!
Ohhmama
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