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Drive Them Away Before They Leave?

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Thread : Drive Them Away Before They Leave?
19 Apr 2008 @ 7:44 PM
stew4aa	Join Date: Sat 19th Apr 2008 Threads: 2 Posts: 11
Drive Them Away Before They Leave? I have ADD and Dyslexia. I am bright articulate and have learned over the years of undiagnosis how to get by....to hide it. In relationships though that is another thing, awful all of it. I appear to be as "normal" as anyone else. I am attractive and articulate but my verbal comprehension is 23% with severe dyslexia and ADD that encompasses many aspects of the diagnoses it really is an art to cover and fit in. I was asked in Flight Attendant training if I had this since I couldn't pass my city codes test? (transposing the letter) I had no idea what this was in 1989. I said no. What's that I thought only boys got that? I had always been told I didn't pay attention, didn't try hard enough, was lazy, stubborn...the standard self esteem busters undiagnosed people experience. But I am determined and tenacious and have a photographic memory with parents especially my Mother who worked tirelessly to help me pass. I work very hard on my own and am a perfectionist (mellowed now with years) but push myself to succeed or find a way.. I worked very hard to cover that I didn't "get" the jokes and quit asking questions after being laughed at. I am lucky I have this trait, because it has enabled me to be a successful 20-year employee of a major airline. (this is a great job for people like us, by the way). However being in a relationship is a whole other deal. I am insecure, way too nice and giving, too gullable and either sub-consciously or consciously, tend to test people to see if they will stick around, which is apparently a no since I have either chosen complete losers or drive them away by my insecurity and need for reassurance. I then end up destroying anything positive. I am ambitious and have had to work hard for EVERYTHING so I have little tolerance for the "victim" mentality and laziness for those who don't have our "gift" as many refer to it as. I have very little true trust and live a very solitary life, which I hate. But can't seem to escape becuse I am very protective of my son and my heart. I am very active in my sons life, who also has dyslecia & add and is only 10 years old. People who meet me never dream I have this so when it begins to show they are confused and think I am weird. Which hurts so much. I have been more forth coming about this since I was "expalined" to where I could understand my test results 5 years ago.I had my test done 9 years before but didn't understand the results and therefore lived even more years suffering....But I don't complain I am positive and make the best out of what I can. I am now on ADD meds, which has really helped but, I continually fail and fail miserably in a "dating relationship." I am not having a "pity party" but, need to know how to date? How to be me with out scaring them off? I am different, I am just tired of being me and it not being okay..... I try to explain it to them if I think they are worth opening that much to someone and ask them to read about it, too understand me better. I am at my wits end over this. Any advice would be appreciated. I don't want anymore critisism in my life or srtess, so please respond only if you have been through this or, have some insight to share. Thanks for yall's time! Quote Last edited by stew4aa : 24 May 2008 @ 1:11 PM. Reason:

Thread : Drive Them Away Before They Leave?

19 Apr 2008 @ 7:44 PM

stew4aa

Join Date: Sat 19th Apr 2008
Threads: 2 Posts: 11

Drive Them Away Before They Leave?

I have ADD and Dyslexia. I am bright articulate and have learned over the years of undiagnosis how to get by....to hide it. In relationships though that is another thing, awful all of it.

I appear to be as "normal" as anyone else. I am attractive and articulate but my verbal comprehension is 23% with severe dyslexia and ADD that encompasses many aspects of the diagnoses it really is an art to cover and fit in. I was asked in Flight Attendant training if I had this since I couldn't pass my city codes test? (transposing the letter) I had no idea what this was in 1989. I said no. What's that I thought only boys got that? I had always been told I didn't pay attention, didn't try hard enough, was lazy, stubborn...the standard self esteem busters undiagnosed people experience. But I am determined and tenacious and have a photographic memory with parents especially my Mother who worked tirelessly to help me pass. I work very hard on my own and am a perfectionist (mellowed now with years) but push myself to succeed or find a way.. I worked very hard to cover that I didn't "get" the jokes and quit asking questions after being laughed at.

I am lucky I have this trait, because it has enabled me to be a successful 20-year employee of a major airline. (this is a great job for people like us, by the way).

However being in a relationship is a whole other deal.

I am insecure, way too nice and giving, too gullable and either sub-consciously or consciously, tend to test people to see if they will stick around, which is apparently a no since I have either chosen complete losers or drive them away by my insecurity and need for reassurance. I then end up destroying anything positive.

I am ambitious and have had to work hard for EVERYTHING so I have little tolerance for the "victim" mentality and laziness for those who don't have our "gift" as many refer to it as.

I have very little true trust and live a very solitary life, which I hate. But can't seem to escape becuse I am very protective of my son and my heart. I am very active in my sons life, who also has dyslecia & add and is only 10 years old.

People who meet me never dream I have this so when it begins to show they are confused and think I am weird. Which hurts so much.

I have been more forth coming about this since I was "expalined" to where I could understand my test results 5 years ago.I had my test done 9 years before but didn't understand the results and therefore lived even more years suffering....But I don't complain I am positive and make the best out of what I can. I am now on ADD meds, which has really helped but, I continually fail and fail miserably in a "dating relationship."

I am not having a "pity party" but, need to know how to date? How to be me with out scaring them off? I am different, I am just tired of being me and it not being okay.....

I try to explain it to them if I think they are worth opening that much to someone and ask them to read about it, too understand me better. I am at my wits end over this. Any advice would be appreciated. I don't want anymore critisism in my life or srtess, so please respond only if you have been through this or, have some insight to share.

Thanks for yall's time!

Quote

Last edited by stew4aa : 24 May 2008 @ 1:11 PM. Reason:

20 Apr 2008 @ 1:41 AM Reply # 1
leese	Join Date: Sun 23rd Dec 2007 Threads: 0 Posts: 1
Fly with the Eagles Dear sweet stew.. I hear ya and I get ya. My ADHD was finally diagnosed at age 48, I'll soon be 51. I refuse to smother you with platitudes. Bottom line, we are different. We have some aspects of intelligence and insight that defies explanation, and other aspects of "not getting" what normals are saying. The later can be so frustrating and debilitating. Maybe we've been given both to infuse some level of humility in us. Here's what I've decided to do this year. Come what may, I am going to the national ADDA convention in Minneapolis this summer. I want a few days of being around "my people", my "type". I NEED to hang with a bunch of adders. Think of it, to be able to be yourself for 3 or 4 days and not worry about people judging your every word. I believe every person I meet will have valuable nuggets of truth on every life topic.. love, career, family, under-sensitive reactions from normals, how I can better my communication/understanding of the non-ADHD world I live in. There are NO adult ADD/ADHD support services in my town. Who knows, maybe I'll start one after this conference. Thing is, Stew, it's natural for us to recoil and isolate after so many negative experiences. Stove's hot; but because we are inherently passionate and inquisitive, we keep touching it... and we get burned a lot. Yet on soooo many, many levels, I think we are the most amazing people on the planet. Fun, innovative, interesting, creative, smart, we like walking on the edge and experiencing ALL of life. The majority of people in this world aren't like us and spend an inordinate amount of wasteful time trying to get us to fit into their boring "normal box". GAH!!!! Dr. Hallowell got it right when he said to be happy in love and career makes us thrive. It's up to us to just hit the delete button when we know a relationship/career isn't right for us. And we're gifting with exceptional intuition, we KNOW when something's not right. The quicker we hit delete and move on, the further ahead we'll be. BTW, Dr. Hallowell and Dr. Handelman have a new website @ www.UnwrappingTheGiftofADD.com. In their words: "The field of ADD is in need of a paradigm shift - a shift toward the strength based assessment and treatment of ADD to unleash the genius within ADD". Lots of positive, insightful stuff. We need that. Fly with the eagles long enough and you'll find an eagle who cherishes your strengths. Poop on the rest of 'em, most normals will never get us. It is what it is. Quote

20 Apr 2008 @ 1:41 AM Reply # 1

leese

Join Date: Sun 23rd Dec 2007
Threads: 0 Posts: 1

Fly with the Eagles

Dear sweet stew.. I hear ya and I get ya. My ADHD was finally diagnosed at age 48, I'll soon be 51. I refuse to smother you with platitudes. Bottom line, we are different. We have some aspects of intelligence and insight that defies explanation, and other aspects of "not getting" what normals are saying. The later can be so frustrating and debilitating. Maybe we've been given both to infuse some level of humility in us.

Here's what I've decided to do this year. Come what may, I am going to the national ADDA convention in Minneapolis this summer. I want a few days of being around "my people", my "type". I NEED to hang with a bunch of adders. Think of it, to be able to be yourself for 3 or 4 days and not worry about people judging your every word. I believe every person I meet will have valuable nuggets of truth on every life topic.. love, career, family, under-sensitive reactions from normals, how I can better my communication/understanding of the non-ADHD world I live in. There are NO adult ADD/ADHD support services in my town. Who knows, maybe I'll start one after this conference.

Thing is, Stew, it's natural for us to recoil and isolate after so many negative experiences. Stove's hot; but because we are inherently passionate and inquisitive, we keep touching it... and we get burned a lot. Yet on soooo many, many levels, I think we are the most amazing people on the planet. Fun, innovative, interesting, creative, smart, we like walking on the edge and experiencing ALL of life. The majority of people in this world aren't like us and spend an inordinate amount of wasteful time trying to get us to fit into their boring "normal box". GAH!!!! Dr. Hallowell got it right when he said to be happy in love and career makes us thrive. It's up to us to just hit the delete button when we know a relationship/career isn't right for us. And we're gifting with exceptional intuition, we KNOW when something's not right. The quicker we hit delete and move on, the further ahead we'll be.

BTW, Dr. Hallowell and Dr. Handelman have a new website @ www.UnwrappingTheGiftofADD.com. In their words: "The field of ADD is in need of a paradigm shift - a shift toward the strength based assessment and treatment of ADD to unleash the genius within ADD". Lots of positive, insightful stuff. We need that. Fly with the eagles long enough and you'll find an eagle who cherishes your strengths. Poop on the rest of 'em, most normals will never get us. It is what it is.

Quote

21 Apr 2008 @ 10:59 AM Reply # 2
Anni	Join Date: Thu 25th Oct 2007 Threads: 2 Posts: 187
A Little Insight Hello stew4aa: Thank you for sharing with the ADDitude forums - you've come to the right place. I did an archive search for you and found a few ADDitude articles that might offer a little guidance and hope to your situation - some focus on marriage, but I think the advice really applies to dating as well in many cases... Relationship Work: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd-web/article/643.html ADHD & Relationships: Marriage and Friendship Help: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/838.html Strengthening Your ADHD Marriage: How to Focus on Love: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/992.html Tips for Couples: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd-web/article/597.html And More... http://www.additudemag.com/topic/adult-add-adhd/friends-relationships.html Hope that helps! Quote

21 Apr 2008 @ 10:59 AM Reply # 2

Anni

Join Date: Thu 25th Oct 2007
Threads: 2 Posts: 187

A Little Insight

Hello stew4aa:

Thank you for sharing with the ADDitude forums - you've come to the right place. I did an archive search for you and found a few ADDitude articles that might offer a little guidance and hope to your situation - some focus on marriage, but I think the advice really applies to dating as well in many cases...

Relationship Work: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd-web/article/643.html

ADHD & Relationships: Marriage and Friendship Help: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/838.html

Strengthening Your ADHD Marriage: How to Focus on Love: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/992.html

Tips for Couples: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd-web/article/597.html

And More... http://www.additudemag.com/topic/adult-add-adhd/friends-relationships.html

Hope that helps!

Quote

4 May 2008 @ 1:10 AM Reply # 3
stew4aa	Join Date: Sat 19th Apr 2008 Threads: 2 Posts: 11
Looking beyond.... I think the big problem I see in myself and others like us, is we are so willing to believe people. Look beyond their shortcomings, because of our own. Outside they see this one person, but when they get past that, it isn't what they thought or expected. I guess it is hard to be truely confident and secure when your whole life you are told different. I as am sure others like myself have learned to "cover" this very well. However I cannot live a lie. I am too honest. People in the " norm" don't like the truth. Even though they "try" to get it, I just don't think they ever will, or ever really want to. I do not use this as a "crutch" as they like to say, but this is who I am, and I have a very hard time expressing emotion to others, even just friends, because it comes out often wrong. Then they leave. Anyone else feel this way? Quote Last edited by stew4aa : 24 May 2008 @ 2:05 PM. Reason:

4 May 2008 @ 1:10 AM Reply # 3

stew4aa

Join Date: Sat 19th Apr 2008
Threads: 2 Posts: 11

Looking beyond....

I think the big problem I see in myself and others like us, is we are so willing to believe people. Look beyond their shortcomings, because of our own.

Outside they see this one person, but when they get past that, it isn't what they thought or expected.

I guess it is hard to be truely confident and secure when your whole life you are told different. I as am sure others like myself have learned to "cover" this very well. However I cannot live a lie. I am too honest. People in the " norm" don't like the truth.

Even though they "try" to get it, I just don't think they ever will, or ever really want to.

I do not use this as a "crutch" as they like to say, but this is who I am, and I have a very hard time expressing emotion to others, even just friends, because it comes out often wrong. Then they leave.

Anyone else feel this way?

Quote

Last edited by stew4aa : 24 May 2008 @ 2:05 PM. Reason:

5 May 2008 @ 2:01 PM Reply # 4
ADD RN	Join Date: Wed 21st Nov 2007 Threads: 6 Posts: 120
Don't get ya I guess after being told that I was different also that I figured that is really okay. I'm married and sometimes he doesn't get it . He tries but at the time of another mess up he wants to divorce me. It always blows over because he knows that It not because I am malious. I however have to many times reign in my impulsiveness .It usually works and frankly since being on this site it has been easier to do because I found a place where they do get it. If a person doesn't get it always that can be okay . I know what kept him attracted to me is because I'm never dull. I love to play, try new things such as trips to the mountains, white water rafting and other things most females shy away from. will try try foods that are of different cultures etc, love music will go to jazz, classic etc concerts and have a mirage of animals. I am not the most organized or even though I have the money always pay my bills on time, I have problems sleeping and keep him awake so I tend to like sleeping alone. It takes me day sometimes weeks to clean my office but it works. When you do find the guy who really likes you for you and look pass what the other consider normal behavior it will be for him real fun ; and times some frustration. However it never will be dull. It is a sad to hear before they find out about you push them away. I have many male friends because even though we couldn't live together they remained in my life because they enjoy that I see life as adventure and tackle it with gusto. I learned long time ago to say "NO" so I am no push over and I do not engage in risky behavior that would cause my demise, I don't drink, do drugs or have sex outside my marrige . It scary to let yourself be open; but I think the chance is worth the risk of getting hurt. Really do you care that most people don't get ya? Hey just have fun Quote

5 May 2008 @ 2:01 PM Reply # 4

ADD RN

Join Date: Wed 21st Nov 2007
Threads: 6 Posts: 120

Don't get ya

I guess after being told that I was different also that I figured that is really okay. I'm married and sometimes he doesn't get it . He tries but at the time of another mess up he wants to divorce me. It always blows over because he knows that It not because I am malious. I however have to many times reign in my impulsiveness .It usually works and frankly since being on this site it has been easier to do because I found a place where they do get it.

If a person doesn't get it always that can be okay . I know what kept him attracted to me is because I'm never dull. I love to play, try new things such as trips to the mountains, white water rafting and other things most females shy away from. will try try foods that are of different cultures etc, love music will go to jazz, classic etc concerts and have a mirage of animals. I am not the most organized or even though I have the money always pay my bills on time, I have problems sleeping and keep him awake so I tend to like sleeping alone. It takes me day sometimes weeks to clean my office but it works. When you do find the guy who really likes you for you and look pass what the other consider normal behavior it will be for him real fun ; and times some frustration. However it never will be dull. It is a sad to hear before they find out about you push them away. I have many male friends because even though we couldn't live together they remained in my life because they enjoy that I see life as adventure and tackle it with gusto. I learned long time ago to say "NO" so I am no push over and I do not engage in risky behavior that would cause my demise, I don't drink, do drugs or have sex outside my marrige . It scary to let yourself be open; but I think the chance is worth the risk of getting hurt. Really do you care that most people don't get ya? Hey just have fun

Quote

7 May 2008 @ 3:57 PM Reply # 5
littlewing27	Join Date: Wed 7th May 2008 Threads: 0 Posts: 1
Hello there! I completely understand your frustration! I'm 31, never been in love or experienced a long term relationship...it's really tough sometimes. My bad habit is always going for the bad boys, who never really want me. So, I decided to go back to counseling, since what I'm doing is not working for me. My untreated ADD, became an issue and she recommended the book, "Women with Attention Deficit Disorder," by Sari Solden. She basically told me no counseling will work until I address my problem with medication, which was very hard for me to swallow at the time, but I'm going to try what she suggested. Anyway their is a chapter in the book about relationships, which was pretty interesting...it went on to say what kind of men women with ADD attract, and one of them was the unemotionally available ones. What I got out of it is that sometimes, we choose the wrong ones or the right ones and we sabotage it because we know that there is something wrong with us and it's our way of protecting ourself. Not letting them in, because they will find us out. I guess we have to believe that we are OK, and fully learn to embrace ourself and our condition before we let anybody in. I've been doing this since I was 14, so think it's behavioral and will continue counseling once I'm medicated. I have a question for you...I also have problems with jobs, and my only passion currently is traveling, so I applied with mesa air as a flight attendant and have an interview tomorrow! Why do you think that the job is good for people like us? Mesa is a smaller airline, do you have any advice on a better major airline to work for after I get my experience? I wish you the best of luck! Quote

7 May 2008 @ 3:57 PM Reply # 5

littlewing27

Join Date: Wed 7th May 2008
Threads: 0 Posts: 1

Hello there!

I completely understand your frustration! I'm 31, never been in love or experienced a long term relationship...it's really tough sometimes. My bad habit is always going for the bad boys, who never really want me. So, I decided to go back to counseling, since what I'm doing is not working for me. My untreated ADD, became an issue and she recommended the book, "Women with Attention Deficit Disorder," by Sari Solden. She basically told me no counseling will work until I address my problem with medication, which was very hard for me to swallow at the time, but I'm going to try what she suggested. Anyway their is a chapter in the book about relationships, which was pretty interesting...it went on to say what kind of men women with ADD attract, and one of them was the unemotionally available ones. What I got out of it is that sometimes, we choose the wrong ones or the right ones and we sabotage it because we know that there is something wrong with us and it's our way of protecting ourself. Not letting them in, because they will find us out. I guess we have to believe that we are OK, and fully learn to embrace ourself and our condition before we let anybody in. I've been doing this since I was 14, so think it's behavioral and will continue counseling once I'm medicated.

I have a question for you...I also have problems with jobs, and my only passion currently is traveling, so I applied with mesa air as a flight attendant and have an interview tomorrow! Why do you think that the job is good for people like us? Mesa is a smaller airline, do you have any advice on a better major airline to work for after I get my experience?

I wish you the best of luck!

Quote

23 May 2008 @ 8:57 PM Reply # 6
stew4aa	Join Date: Sat 19th Apr 2008 Threads: 2 Posts: 11
finally an answer I get!!! Thank You will go buy book tomorrow! Flight Attendant is a great job for us!!! Quote

23 May 2008 @ 8:57 PM Reply # 6

stew4aa

Join Date: Sat 19th Apr 2008
Threads: 2 Posts: 11

finally an answer I get!!!

Thank You will go buy book tomorrow!

Flight Attendant is a great job for us!!!

Quote

26 May 2008 @ 11:18 PM Reply # 7
Cheri	Join Date: Mon 26th May 2008 Threads: 0 Posts: 2
Thank God! I couldn't believe it when I found this forum and yours was the first one I read. It was like reading my life. I have been with losers until I met my present boyfriend 3 1/2 yrs ago. That was also when I was diagnosed (at 49 years old). I was terrified when I read the statistics of failed relationships but was determined that if I JUST TRIED HARD ENOUGH I could make it work....knowing the enemy is half the battle, right? Whatever! We are now readying our house ( my dream house) to put up for sale so we can go our separate ways. There are absolutely no words that can describe my devastation, humiliation and feeling of stupidity. Also, at the risk of singing "Cry Me A River And Build Me A Boat", I had excepted the cold, hard truth that I will never be in a healthy relationship so "buck up, Cowgirl!" Then I went online to see if anything new was there to make me feel better. Where was all this in the beginning? I might have been better equipped and possibly could have made it work. Quote

26 May 2008 @ 11:18 PM Reply # 7

Cheri

Join Date: Mon 26th May 2008
Threads: 0 Posts: 2

Thank God!

I couldn't believe it when I found this forum and yours was the first one I read. It was like reading my life. I have been with losers until I met my present boyfriend 3 1/2 yrs ago. That was also when I was diagnosed (at 49 years old). I was terrified when I read the statistics of failed relationships but was determined that if I JUST TRIED HARD ENOUGH I could make it work....knowing the enemy is half the battle, right? Whatever! We are now readying our house ( my dream house) to put up for sale so we can go our separate ways. There are absolutely no words that can describe my devastation, humiliation and feeling of stupidity. Also, at the risk of singing "Cry Me A River And Build Me A Boat", I had excepted the cold, hard truth that I will never be in a healthy relationship so "buck up, Cowgirl!" Then I went online to see if anything new was there to make me feel better. Where was all this in the beginning? I might have been better equipped and possibly could have made it work.

Quote

27 May 2008 @ 12:37 AM Reply # 8
Cheri	Join Date: Mon 26th May 2008 Threads: 0 Posts: 2
RE: ADD RN......sleeping That really has to be one of the worse things about AD/HD. It has plaqued me since childhood. I take dexadrine through the day so taking a sleeping med at night wasn't sitting well with me. No matter how early I took it I was groggy in the morning. I tried liquid melotonin over a year ago and it seemed to help.....sometimes. This year I just happened to find a tea called "Nighty Night" and decided to give it a try. When I did I also decided to take the liquid melotonin. It's MAGIC! I now take the L.M. and have my tea in bed while I watch TV. Not only do I sleep, if I do wake up during the night (bathroom!!!), I can go back to sleep and feel really rested in the morning. It's incredible!! Now if I could find the cure for "Social Grace" I'll have it made!!! Quote

27 May 2008 @ 12:37 AM Reply # 8

Cheri

Join Date: Mon 26th May 2008
Threads: 0 Posts: 2

RE: ADD RN......sleeping

That really has to be one of the worse things about AD/HD. It has plaqued me since childhood. I take dexadrine through the day so taking a sleeping med at night wasn't sitting well with me. No matter how early I took it I was groggy in the morning. I tried liquid melotonin over a year ago and it seemed to help.....sometimes. This year I just happened to find a tea called "Nighty Night" and decided to give it a try. When I did I also decided to take the liquid melotonin. It's MAGIC! I now take the L.M. and have my tea in bed while I watch TV. Not only do I sleep, if I do wake up during the night (bathroom!!!), I can go back to sleep and feel really rested in the morning. It's incredible!! Now if I could find the cure for "Social Grace" I'll have it made!!!

Quote

6 Aug 2008 @ 1:17 AM Reply # 9
stew4aa	Join Date: Sat 19th Apr 2008 Threads: 2 Posts: 11
Thanks Cheri I feel the same way................. How are you now? I really have just given up. I am tired of all the mess. Quote

6 Aug 2008 @ 1:17 AM Reply # 9

stew4aa

Join Date: Sat 19th Apr 2008
Threads: 2 Posts: 11

Thanks Cheri

I feel the same way................. How are you now? I really have just given up. I am tired of all the mess.

Quote

8 Aug 2008 @ 3:18 PM Reply # 10
Exit	Join Date: Thu 7th Aug 2008 Threads: 1 Posts: 7
New to posting, not to these forums.... I've been to the Additudemag.com site a lot, but I'm rather a timid and sad sort, and responding to comments from mostly women is extremely intimidating to me. Why? Because I'm a guy and not an especially smart one. In other words, when I think that I'm being cute, actually women find me - this from my ex-wife of twenty-five years - not so much. So, after two or three omlette flips in my twisted and manipulative mind, I've decided to toss my drivel into your here-to-fore, pristinely enlightened conversation, knowing that because many of you are sensitive and respectful of everyone's feelings, and you've got ADD, thus doubling the quotient, you probably will refrain from hammering me too badly. Also, kindly note that as a new poster and fellow ADDer, I'll shortly burn myself out and crumble away, never to post again. I have a question for "leese" (posting on 04/20/2008), or anyone else, who mentioned that she was going to attend an ADD convention, where she'd be round other ADDers. Did you go, and what were your findings? You left me in the dark. My fear is that a stern phalanx of my cognitively impaired peers will also judge me obnoxious and boring, just as some of my more normal, even best, friends do. And then there's dating. I want to date a known fugitive from this website, or in other words, an age appropriate woman with ADD/ADHD, not someone so crazy that I'll wake up and have to walk a highway to find a missing body part, but definitely someone certifiably ADD/ADHD or some combination, thereof (I'm both). Anyone, please elaborate on your experiences meeting, romancing, etc. fellow ADDers. Thank you. Now I will duck and cover. Quote Last edited by Exit : 9 Aug 2008 @ 11:26 AM. Reason:

8 Aug 2008 @ 3:18 PM Reply # 10

Exit

Join Date: Thu 7th Aug 2008
Threads: 1 Posts: 7

New to posting, not to these forums....

I've been to the Additudemag.com site a lot, but I'm rather a timid and sad sort, and responding to comments from mostly women is extremely intimidating to me. Why? Because I'm a guy and not an especially smart one. In other words, when I think that I'm being cute, actually women find me - this from my ex-wife of twenty-five years - not so much. So, after two or three omlette flips in my twisted and manipulative mind, I've decided to toss my drivel into your here-to-fore, pristinely enlightened conversation, knowing that because many of you are sensitive and respectful of everyone's feelings, and you've got ADD, thus doubling the quotient, you probably will refrain from hammering me too badly. Also, kindly note that as a new poster and fellow ADDer, I'll shortly burn myself out and crumble away, never to post again.

I have a question for "leese" (posting on 04/20/2008), or anyone else, who mentioned that she was going to attend an ADD convention, where she'd be round other ADDers. Did you go, and what were your findings? You left me in the dark. My fear is that a stern phalanx of my cognitively impaired peers will also judge me obnoxious and boring, just as some of my more normal, even best, friends do.

And then there's dating. I want to date a known fugitive from this website, or in other words, an age appropriate woman with ADD/ADHD, not someone so crazy that I'll wake up and have to walk a highway to find a missing body part, but definitely someone certifiably ADD/ADHD or some combination, thereof (I'm both). Anyone, please elaborate on your experiences meeting, romancing, etc. fellow ADDers. Thank you. Now I will duck and cover.

Quote

Last edited by Exit : 9 Aug 2008 @ 11:26 AM. Reason:

9 Aug 2008 @ 11:30 AM Reply # 11
Exit	Join Date: Thu 7th Aug 2008 Threads: 1 Posts: 7
One more question, and then I'll disappear. Cheri- What is Liquid Melotonin? Is it very safe? Do you still use it nightly? For whom is it recommended? Where do you get this stuff? Thanks. Quote

9 Aug 2008 @ 11:30 AM Reply # 11

Exit

Join Date: Thu 7th Aug 2008
Threads: 1 Posts: 7

One more question, and then I'll disappear.

Cheri- What is Liquid Melotonin? Is it very safe? Do you still use it nightly? For whom is it recommended? Where do you get this stuff? Thanks.

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Local Time : 7 Sep 2008 3:15 PM
(Sun, 07 Sep 2008 19:15:23 GMT)

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