My son's been diagnosed with adhd at the age of 2 1/2 and so far he's been his hyper little self but his environment has been able to cope with him. He's not on any meds and I don't really want him to go on anything because I know what it's like being on Ritalin etc, having adhd myself. And personally, I've got a rather positive view of adhd: being creative, lots of energy, imagination, exurbant etc. Those are all traits that are not negative and make him special. So instead of looking for something to 'cure' or 'control' him, we find ways to help him manage situations in which he struggles. We also help him with expressing his feelings, which brings me to my problem.

Here in New Zealand the new school year has just started. And the preschool he goes to is just fantastic with him. They make allowances for his energy and creativity. And I'm really grateful to them, because it takes effort and time on their part.

Today though he had one of his very excitable days, literally bouncing off the walls at preschool. So much that the headmaster thought it would be good to get him re-assessed. Which I'm fine with. Assessment helps to find his strengths and areas in which he is not coping well.

I'm wondering though if others have had similar problems with preschoolers, but more importantly what they did when there kids are bouncing off the walls :-)

So far the changes in routines and lifestyle are: nutrition (no artificial additives & preservatives, whenever possible organic), fish oil (eye-Q liquid which his high in EPA), lots of motivation, punishment only for purposely defiant actions (time out), otherwise helping him and showing him alternative ways to react/express/handle situation, ignoring tantrums, reward system, limited tv (max half hour a day if at all), lots of playtime with playdough, lego and crafts which he loves, daily routine but with allowances in time for impulsive ideas (going to beach, doing something together) and last but not least, I'm on ritalin to keep me 'in check' and 'under control'. Though I have to admit I hate taking it. I like being impulsive and creative, though household and finance don't. (PS sounds like perfect parenting when I read this, but I'm not, sometimes I really struggle keeping my cool and I do yell at him sometimes when it gets too much. Plus our household is rather chaotic :-)

Problems for us: 1) time out doesn't impress him at all. It's the most boring place you could imagine - the hallway, all doors closed, no furniture and no windows, and the light turned on. All he can do there is sit down or roll around on the floor. But the only thing he wants to know is how long he has to be there and then he'll go there and sing songs or whatever. So time out is more a place to calm down for him. 2) frustrations - if something doesn't work (for example lego) he can get into such a rage and throw everything around and hit the closest person or dog near him.

Any ideas on how to deal with these frustrations? I want to show him how to do it differently or help him find his own solution, but first I need to get him to calm down. He's in such a rage that holding or hugging him results in getting hit and bitten, leaving him be and the furniture gets thrown around. Sometimes I drag him into time out (hallway) but then he'll just bang his head on the walls in frustration.

Are there any other ways of punishing him for doing something naughty on purpose, since time out doesn't seem to have that effect? Taking toys away doesn't bother him either. He'll just shrug his shoulders and say that he doesn't want it anyway, which at that time is true. He's not interested in it at the time, so he doesn't really care what happens to it. Even the reward system has limited results. Although the rewards are things he really likes having, he sometimes just isn't interested in gaining another star. He's a really strongwilled little personality who really knows what he wants (at the time). Bribing doesn't work either :-)

What I'm going to change from tomorrow, instead of driving him to preschool we'll walk there. It's about a 20 minute walk, and that might help him work of his excessive energy. Plus I'm going to try doing some yoga with him this afternoon (ahem, we'll see how THAT goes :-) Doing the Tree Pose, Rocking the Boat, Playing Dead Bug, or so. I've got this book which I'm looking at with ideas.

Parenting ideas and techniques and ideas for how preschool could cope would be great!

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